Part 15 (2/2)
”Oh! Is not he very sorry?”
”Of course. n.o.body can help being sorry.”
”Do they all seem sorry? What did they do? What do they say?”
”Oh! They are very sorry; you must know that.”
”Anybody more than the rest?”
”Why some few of them cried; but I don't know that that shows them to be more sorry. It is some people's way to cry--and others not.”
Hugh wished much to learn something about Tooke; but, afraid of showing what was in his thoughts, he went off to quite another subject.
”Do you know, Phil,” said he, ”you would hardly believe it, but I have never been half so miserable as I was the first day or two I came here?
I don't care now, half so much, for all the pain, and for being lame, and--Oh! But I can never be a soldier or a sailor--I can never go round the world! I forgot that.”
And poor Hugh hid his face in his pillow.
”Never mind!” said Phil, stooping over him very kindly. ”Here is a long time before you; and you will get to like something else just as well.
Papa wanted to be a soldier, remember, and could not; and he is as happy as ever he can be, now that he is a shop-keeper in London. Did you ever see anybody merrier than my father is? I never did. Come! Cheer up, Hugh! You will be very happy somehow.”
Phil kissed him: and when Hugh looked up in surprise, Phil's eyes were full of tears.
”Now I have a good mind to ask you,” said Hugh, ”something that has been in my mind ever since.”
”Ever since when?”
”Ever since I came to Crofton. What could be the reason that you were not more kind to me then?”
”I! Not kind?” said Phil, in some confusion. ”Was not I kind?”
”No. At least I thought not. I was so uncomfortable,--I did not know anybody, or what to do; and I expected you would show me, and help me.
I always thought I could not have felt lonely with you here; and then when I came, you got out of my way, as if you were ashamed of me, and you did not help me at all; and you laughed at me.”
”No; I don't think I did that.”
”Yes, you did, indeed.”
”Well, you know, little boys always have to s.h.i.+ft for themselves when they go to a great school--”
”But why, if they have brothers there? That is the very thing I want to know. I think it is very cruel.”
”I never meant to be cruel, of course. But--but--the boys were all ready to laugh at me about a little brother that was scarcely any better than a girl;--and consider how you talked on the coach, and what ridiculous hair you had,--and what a fuss you made about your money and your pocket,--and how you kept popping out things about Miss Harold, and the girls, and Susan.”
”You _were_ ashamed of me, then.”
”Well, what wonder if I was?”
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