Volume 1 Chapter 4 (1/2)

Falling in love with that woman

TL: Cannongerbil

Editing: Ulti, Xenthur, Deus ex Machina

Part 1

“No money, no women!”

I stood up and shouted while I was having a drink with uild, but everyone else ignored

“Those fried frog legs look tasty Just give me a bit Just the kneecaps are fine Or even just the leftover bones, just let me suck on them”

“N-O No Didn’t you say you wouldn’t need money or women for awhile?”

Lynn let out a soft sigh and looked at s with her fork

“I’ve been good for the past two days, haven’t I?”

“It’s just two days You brought your money issues upon yourself You were the one who borrowed ed it all on food and wine in anticipation of the reward of taking down the Destroyer, until you ended up spending more money than the reward covers There’s no reason for me to sympathize with you”

“Yeah, you should learn a little self restraint”

Even Taylor joined Lynn in lecturing me

What boring people Men shouldn’t be saving up e amounts of money only to make it all back in a snap

“Ah, this is why I can’t stand poor people Pah, this beer really tastes great”

“Hey, Keith, how do you still have money? Didn’t you borrow money and spent a whole lot as well?”

He went on a spending spree like I did, so how the hell is he enjoying his food without a care in the world? Isn’t that odd?

“Unlike you, I reat when you drink it in front of poor people!”

Don’t fan yourself with those notes! da! If I was the one whoback then, I would be…

“If you have that much money, lend me some”

“I don’t want to This le eris to offer to Dust Though, if you were to lick ain I’ you”

“fuck you, ould beg from a person ouldn’t even help a friend in need? So, Taylor, please?”

“No Come talk to me after you’ve returned what you owe me It wouldn’t help you to spoil you any more than this”

He’s as hard headed as ever, as expected of a Crusader Normally, you would happily treat your friends to a meal if they are in trouble What kind of people are they? As their friend, I’m embarrassed

“Tsk, fine, forget asking you guys If you want to apologize, now’s your only chance! Right now I’ll accept it for just the cost of a ize when I’ve struck it rich! Now, cry and apologize!”

“No, I won’t” x3

“You're all a bunch of stingy little bastards When I strike it rich I’ll definitely slap all of you with a wad of cash”

I say that, but right now I don’t even have the capital required to make more money

My motto is to live leisurely and become rich, but you can’t spend money you don’t have

Ahh, isn’t there a noblewoman bountiful in both wealth and body who doesn’t knohat to do with either of them? Nah, there’s no way such a convenient woman could exist Even I know that much

“Isn’t that Dust? What are you doing out here?”

The person who called out to me was the blonde Crusader as in Kazu, but…on that adventure with her

Also, I was really taken aback by e recently found out about her

“Yo, Darkness… no, wait, it’s Lalatina, right?”

“Don’t call me by that name!”

To think that Darkness was a fake name and she actually had such a cutesy name like Lalatina

I never suspected that she was actually a lady of house Dustiness, the so-called right hand of this country She wasn’t just an extreh Crusader who couldn’t land any of her attacks

I know fro but trouble, but I can’t feel that kind of dislike for Darkness It’s probably because she doesn’t look down upon the commoners and treats them like equals

I’ve always suspected that the good reputation of the Dustiness house is a carefully crafted facade, but it seeht not actually be a lie after all

She’s working as a Crusader, but I can distinctly get the i lady if I squint a little I really wanted to ask why a noble woman like her would become an adventurer, but that’s too direct of a question

“You’re alone? How unusual What happened to Kazuma?”

“I-It’s not like we are always together! Kazuma’s just a companion!”

You didn’t have to deny it that strongly People who are in the sa similar schedules

Did she have so? Well, not that I really care

“Kazu his hands on thein his room”

If I had the money, I too would want to lead a life where I sleep until noon and do nothing except eat and sleep

“So, what are you doing alone?”

“Megumin took Aqua out on her daily explosion trip and I ended up with soo on an adventure with Chris It’s been some time, after all”

“Chris is the girl who cried after she got her panties stolen by Kazuht? That silver haired thief with the pitiful chest?”

“Hey, don’t say that in front of her It seems like she’s quite concerned about that”

If you are concerned about that, then don’t wear such revealing clothes Though, I suppose that dressing lightly is expected for a thief

“Now then, I should hurry on Oh, yeah, please stop doing those stupid things with Kazuma”

“What? I don’t recall doing anything stupid with Kazu rowdy at the tavern and using Steal on so them home without underwear”

“You did that kind of thing… To think that kind of teasing play is possible… I’ll have to lecture him later”

Watching Darkness’ back as she angrily left, I suddenly thought of so

“Darkness is the lady of the Dustiness house, right? That means she must have a lot of money… Hoho”

I don’t have a lot of goodwith theether before does concern o In fact, she fits my type perfectly

If I successfully trick her into supportingmarried is a bit of a pain, but there’s no proble that she’ll easily fall for me if I drop a few kind words here and there

I think Kazuht, first step is to gather inforate your prey before you go on a hunt

… Let's tail her for a bit

Part 2

Darkness headed outside of town after uild, and I stealthily followed after her

Are they really going on an adventure with just two people? A party of a Thief and a Crusader isn’t terribly well balanced, but I suppose it’s not like they couldn’t fight Though, I hope they aren’t planning on being reckless out there

I snuck out after them, careful to maintain a certain amount of distance between us

Her fight where she got bit by the Rookie Killer left quite an iood chance to see what she’s really capable of She wasn’t armed or armoured back then, after all

“Er, u?”

The loner who I happened to run into and dragged along asked me uneasily

“It’s not like you’re doing anything, right? You’re all alone like usual”

“It’s just a coincidence You just happened to run into me when I was alone…”

She’s a Cris around Kazue, she’s always alone Whenever she isn’t hanging out with Kazu a game by herself

Her na sense

“Then isn’t it fine? You would’ve just been playing cards or chess on your own again if you weren't here, right?”

“N-not at all! I read books and also play other board ga other people! Err… Oh yeah, I also memorized the entire menu recently!”

Did you uild? Oh yeah, she’s prettyat theseat, isn’t she?

“It’s pretty satisfying when you finally e to order every item on the menu in sequence, you know? I don’t recall how h the menu by now”

“O-Oh How about you have a roup sometime?”

“C-Can I do that? But, wouldn’t it be bad if I were to mess up the mood within their party?”

“It’s because you keep worrying about these kinds of useless things that you end up as a loner You can stand to be a bitand drinking on so in the world, you know?”

“I’m not a loner! And I always pay for e, o “We are friends, right?” and get me to treat them to lunch”

“… If I make some money from this, I’ll treat you to a meal”

I can’t believe even I’ her tales pricks at my heart

She’s a 14 year old brat, but she’s pretty well developed and could be said to be fairly beautiful Normally the boys would be all over her, but for soet close to her

It’s not like she’s hated or anything She has a pretty good reputation ast adventurers

“Eh, you’re going to treat me? But, if it’s your treat, itcriht?”

“Hey, that’s pretty harsh of you! Is it really that strange for me to offer to treat someone!?”

“Yes”

“Don’t answer instantly! Anyway, back to the original topic We’re tailing Darkness Come with me”

“Eh, tailing… So Dust-san is the type who can’t bear to greet an acquaintance and ends up shadowing them around all day too?”

“… Please, at least call out to them”

“H-How could I do that? I wouldn’t want to interrupt their day by suddenly calling out to the if it turns out that they don’t actually re me…”

“Even if they don’t know you too well, nobody will get upset over a greeting You should be a bit bolder… No, wait, why do we keep getting off topic whenever we talk? Anyway, there’s a good reason for tailing Darkness It’s, well, you know…”

I can’t really think of a good excuse, but I need so with it

“Well, Kazuood friends, but I’m not terribly close to the others in his party I want to become friends with a friend of my friend You understand, don’t you?”

“I do! I understand very well! If you beco your circle of friends, right?”

She’s surprisingly weak to the keyword ‘friend’

… I should keep an eye on her to uy’s tricks Though, right now, I’ll gladly take advantage of that personality of hers

“Right? In order to ather information about them If you knohat they like and what they do every day, it’d be easy to find things to talk about, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right Megu into trouble, so I’ to stop her to worry about conversation”

That explosion girl steals food? This girl is pretty strange as it is, but it seeirl is a piece of work herself

“Plus, if you become friends with Darkness, wouldn’t it be easier for you to becoirl?”

“I-Is that so? I-I don’t really care about Megumin, but if you put it that way, I suppose I’ll tail her too”

It’s really great that her buttons are so obvious

I told her that it was coincidence that we met, but I actually visited places that she was likely to be at while I was tailing Darkness

And as I expected, she was browsing the books in front of the bookstore

She arily looking around the roreeted her just as she was about to pay for the books, and she almost jumped out of her skin

In the event that we end up being discovered, it’d be easier to come up with an acceptable excuse if she ith me

Part 3

Afterthe plains for awhile, Darkness and Chris ran across a couple of goblins Even if they only have two people, it should be easy for theoblins

First, Darkness charged directly at theoblins to focus their attacks on her

Darkness’ attacks didn’t even leave a scratch on either of them, but she seeoblins rained down on her

Actually, doesn’t it look like she’s deliberately ju to find an opportunity to attack, but is unable to find a clear shot with Darkness ju about all over the place

“Bind!”

Oh, that’s the thief skill that can restrict the target’s oblins will be bound… No, wait, the one as bound is Darkness Now that Darkness is wrapped in ropes, the two goblins took this chance to whale on her What the hell are you guys doing

Ah, Chris snuck behind the goblins as they were focused on Darkness and stabbed one of the after

… Isn’t that a strange way to use Bind? Norine it, or did Darkness jump into the path of the bind of her own volition?

“Eh? Say, did she jump into the path of the Bind?”

“Sure seems like it”

Yunyun slapped my shoulder and asked me a question, and I answered affirmatively

”Though, they are quite some distance away It could very well be the result of some kind ofbefore for a conclusion”

The two of theoblins This tih battle for just those two Well, I guess it wouldn’t be a bad idea for s look too bad It’d increase ood impression here

They are too focused on the enemy to notice us, so we should move up to hide behind that boulder I’ll be able to pick the perfect tie point too

We narrowed the distance between us by quite a bit, but neither theoblins noticed us

Now that we are this close, I can just barely make out their voices

“Darkness, there are five of thee”

“I knoon’t easily suboblins!”

“Ah, no, I’”

“Even if they forcibly push ues of theirs all overit! Actually, do it!”

“W-Wait, Darkness!”

Darkness waved her sword around and charged straight in

I’ve been getting this vague feeling for so that she won’t suboblins, but at the same time she has a very excited expression on her face…

“Aah, because the straps are too loose,off on its own!”

Hey, why is that Crusader tossing away pieces of her own aroes?

“My weapon is slippery frorasp… Da I can do to stop these goblins fro as they wish…”

Hey… She just tossed away her oeapon

Her breathing was ragged, and she had an ecstatic smile on her face… could she be excited?

I know that battle et extremely worked up in battle, but that doesn’t seeh It’s more like… it’s the same expression you see on the customers in the succubus shop

“Co around! Bind!”

Chris just aimed that skill at Darkness!

Once again bound in ropes, Darkness collapsed to the ground

“Dammit! To be bound in such a situation!”

Wait, hold on, you didn’t even try to dodge that skill

“What are you planning to do to me now that I can’t move? Don’t tell me, you intend to cut awayjust a bit of cloth on my chest andclub-”

“I won’t let you say anything more!”

Even though they shouldn’t be able to understand words, the goblins were just aardly standing around, and Chris quickly attacked them

The goblins tore their gazes away from Darkness towards the new threat

“Wait, Chris, just a little while more! Just five more minutes will do! Just a little more!”

“Don’t sound so disappointed!”

The goblins’ attention were briefly drawn by Darkness as she shouted those inexplicable words In that instant, Chris thrust her knife at their vitals

Their teamwork isn’t too bad, but… how do I put this?

The goblins were all taken out in the end, but after seeing Darkness’s reckless actions, I was reconsidering getting involved with her

There’s no way things can end well if I get involved with her Even though she looks gorgeous, in fact she’s perfectly my type… But those statements Those are…

“Huh? Darkness’s actions are really strange, aren’t they? I etting hit…”

“You think so too, huh?”

“Ah, but it ht alongside someone else, so…”

“Don’t suddenly bring up so so pitiful No, that isn’t it This is definitely abnormal”

Darkness is probably a masochist She’s definitely a pervert who derives pleasure froical pain

“She has such a great body, but she’s a pervert… and it feels like her case is quite serious”

“Err, why does she see hit?”

“It’s best if a brat like you doesn’t know about that If you really irl later”

Making such a happy face when getting hit by clubs… That’s definitely a high level et involved with such a troublesome woman

Tiive up, the only one who can handle her is probably Kazuma… Let’s leave before we are discovered

I slowly turned around, but froze after hearing what came next

“Darkness, you are going to get abandoned by Kazu that kind of stuff”

“What?!… Using!”

“Don’t look so happy while saying that I’ve beento ask for some time, just what kind of man is your type?”

Norirl’s talk, but I suppose I should at least find out what Darkness’s type is Perhaps I could trick Keith into going out with her and reap some of the rewards that way Plus…

“Dust-san, please wait! Let’s listen for a little while more!”

Yunyun was clutching ontowith interest as she listened carefully to what they were saying

… Girls sure love talking about matters of romance

“Hure, but he must be a pervert who see at other wo He would score a lot of points if he is a trashy person who underestiet aith as little work as possible And if he was in debt, even better! Someone who doesn’t work and just drinks all day…”

“Okay, okay, that’s enough, Darkness! Seems like I need to properly lecture you one of these days!”

So that sort of trashy person is her type As if such a botto scu at me, Yunyun?

“Don’t you meet all of those conditions, Dust-san? Actually, it sounds like she’s describing you in particular”

I don’t follow at all

“Hey, don’t say stupid things I’m not that bad of a fiend”

Don’t make fun of me If I have to pick a person, that description was definitely closer to Kazuma

“Err, then, please answer these questions”

“Where did this come from?”

“Question 1: What would you do if you see a sexy girl who fits your type at the bar?”

“Obviously, I would immediately hit on her Also, it’d be nice if I could cop a feel or thile pretending I’m drunk”

“…”

Hey, say so away?

“Question 2: Would you rather gain enough ain fae with your companions-”

“Obviously I'd want to gain a fortune without doing anything”

“I-I didn’t even finish h”

It’s pretty rude to sigh while looking at soiven the same answer There’s no need to even consider it

“Question 3: You are currently laden with debts”

“Yeah, as usual”

“… Question 4: Beer is most delicious when you skip work to drink-”

“Yeah, that’s the best kind of drink”

“You really are compatible with Darkness”

This girl is looking at entle smile

Just about everyone should’ve answered the same way as me What’s there to even be conflicted about?

Yunyun suddenly fell silent and looked down, crossing her ar to herself Just what came over her?

After doing that for a while, she suddenly raised her head, stared at lare and nodded

“Ahh! Don’t tell me, Dust-san, do you like Darkness-san? You wanted to find outher If that’s the case, then everything makes sense So that’s why you were so passionate about this! I’ve read about such characters who can’t honestly confess in my stories!”

S-She has so

Well, that waswhat just happened, I don’t feel like going through with it anymore

“I thought that it would be soo out with Dust-san, but I’ to me! I’ve read a lot of romance books!”

“Ah, sorry to rain on your parade after you’ve gotten all fired up, but Darkness is a little too-”

“It’s not just books, I’m very interested in actual love affairs as well, so I’ll do my best! That time with Vanir-san was a little special, but this time it’ll definitely work!”

It’s useless She doesn’t see to my words

Co Vanir’s love incident, wasn’t she?

Hmm… if I turn a blind eye to Darkness’s personality, she’s actually a pretty good woman

It’ll be nothing but trouble if I get too involved with nobles, but if she falls for et her to support oes!

Part 4

A couple of days after that, Yunyun called me toa mask, Sir Vanir, was also there with her

Sir Vanir is an extre Duke of hell After a little incident, Yunyun, Sir Vanir, and I will often coether for some reason or another

This all started when Sir started a side business at the Adventurer’s guild to shore up the finances of a certain h for so Yunyun make friends

That ended up heading off in sohtly less of a loner now

Still, what is Sir doing here?

“You’re late! I thought I told you to meet up before noon! It’s way past noon now! Ah, sorry, please give me a little more time to decide on my order”

Yunyun lowered her head to the waitress Seems like she’s been in this cafe for quite some time, if the irritated expression on the waitress’s face as she headed back inside is any indication

“You’re ten years too early to get me to show up on time!”

“You’re the one who’s late! Why are you so arrogant!?”

“You’re an exceptional piece of trash, as usual Moi only ca because Moi foresaonderful dark e…”

“Sorry, Sir I don’t really care about her, but I didn’t know you would be here as well, Sir”

“The Crily reacts to the word ‘friend’ was engrossed in the books at s when I took a peek into her future, so here I am”

“What do youaboutDarkness-san…”

“Wooing Darkness… What are you talking about?”

I’ve just woken up, what kind of nonsense are you spouting first thing in the ?

Why do I have to court that high level masochist?

“Di-Did you really forget?… Is your head really filled with tokoroten slime? If we remove your desires, just ill be left of Dust-san?”

I thought she would’ve been angry, but she suddenly looked at aze

“Hmm? Humans are creatures that live for their desires There are a few oddballs that pop up every now and then who live to work, but those guys have a few screws loose You live to fulfill your own desires You work to earn enougha human is all about!”

Yeah, nothing good will coht life You need to enjoy life to its fullest It’s your own life, you know?

“I can’t believe you can proudly declare that I’ht process of a wastrel, deep down…”

“As a devil, these are the types of people I prefer What a wonderfully decadent idea! You’re justto live and have fun, but to dress it up as justice and the natural way of things is truly a”

“I’m honoured by your praise, Sir”

H praised by a devil? I get the feeling that I’ve nore it for now

“Ahh, who cares about that? How could you forget about it after you asked me to help you?”

“Ah, I did say that, didn’t I? I got Kazu hiot about that”

“Doesn’t Kazuot someone like that to treat you…”

“Of course, Kazuma and I are true friends, after all”

“That isn’t true friends at all! It’s just being a bad friend…”

Yunyun grabbed her head and sighed

She doesn’t get it at all Bad friends and true friends are practically synonyms

“Why do you look so tired? Did you exert yourself too ht?”

“W-W-What are you saying!? How could you ask that of a girl!?”

“Hey, aren’t you ht be tired after reading books all night Say, why don’t you tellabout with that cute mouth of yours?”

“T-That’s sexual harassment!”

That’s just so, you didn’t need to h, when I said so me a job for a week

You shouldn’t talk about romance or matters of love in front of her Seems like she’s too busy with her job to worry about such e, so you must never st us adventurers

“Yes, these are some wonderful dark emotions indeed! It seems I do not need to worry about food with you around By the way, the adventurer who always chickens out at the critical h to pay off that debt”

See pretty well for himself

He ended up rich by selling his inventions to Sir I really could stand to learn a thing or two from his skills as a businessman

“Right, back to the original topic, I’ve been studying to better understand modern romance Please take a look at these These are a s romance novels”

She spread the stack of novels on the table in front of me

It see alone all the time

They all had strange titles like ‘Thy na my brother-in-law at the center of the de and eat you up’

“These are all written by the same author Apparently he ca romance novels, and frequently einal works, and aren’t copied from any other source”

“Well, I don’t really care about that So, what about them?”

“These are all popular rost women Thatwomen desire”

“I see I don’t really get these kinds of things”

“Hmm, human love affairs aren’t exactly part of Moi’s expertise either”

“Yeah, I know full well you two aren’t fa these as reference, I’ve come up with a bunch of acts that’ll make women swoon And this is it!”

Yunyun slammed down a piece of paper she had written in advance

Written on it is an entire essay Wasn’t she reluctantly forced into helping me? She seems more motivated than I am

“Let’s start with so simple: Kabedon!”

“Oh, I know that I often use it when threatening someone”

“It’s a th and manliness, yes?”

It’s great way to threaten weak looking guys at the bar It’s really a to watch their expressions of fear when you back them to a wall and slam down hard on it

“That’s not quite it There are so entirely Vanir-san is usually pretty reliable, unlike Dust-san, but you can’t be counted on when it comes to matters of roirl standing next to a wall and slaainst the wall next to her head”

“… Isn’t that the sa that done to you? Ah, wait, considering Darkness’s personality, she ht enjoy that”

“That girl with special inclinations would be quite happy about that Rather than a wall, wouldn’t she be happier if you hit her directly?”

“No, you can’t do that! That aside, well, this is a bit of a cliche, but there’s arriving in the nick of time to save her when she’s in trouble That will make her admire you!”

“In that case, maybe I could call Keith and the others to help out and threaten Darkness… But, wait, wouldn’t she enjoy being in that situation?”

“Yes, I’m certain she will feel joy rather than any sort of dark emotions”

I’ her Sir also has the sa on this

“Is-Is that so? Then let’s put it aside for no about giving her a present or soThere shouldn’t be anyone ould be upset upon receiving a present”

A present, huh? I enjoy receiving presents, but it’s a bit of a pain to be the one giving it But, yes, it would be effective Hmm, a present that Darkness would like…

“Say, what kind of presents would make you happy?”

“Me?… H to become friends with me…”

Leaving aside the first part for the moment… She has a few people she can talk to like Sir and me now, but it seely low

“By the hat do you think would ood present for her, Sir?”

“A whip, candles, or soood presents for her She would also be happy with a wooden horse”

“Eh? What is she going to do with such things?”

Yunyun tilted her head in confusion, but I don’t feel like going into detail

Sir’s suggestions don’t sound too bad, but it feels like she’ll stab me the moment I present them to her