Chapter 67 (2/2)
O Shin went to him from behind and hugged him. Myohan liked the warmth, so he looked up at him. The cat approached them and tried rubbing its face on Myohan’s leg. He spoke calmly,
“Being lonely means feeling alone after being together.”
“So?”
“I’ve always been alone, so I’m not lonely.”
He sounded dry. The cat meowed. O Shin turned Myohan, stroked his hair, and kissed him. His lips went away after a short kiss, giving a soft warmth. He spoke gently as he looked at Myohan with affectionate eyes.
“Since when have you been alone?”
“Since the beginning.”
Myohan knew that answer made no sense, but it was the best he would get.
“I’ve been living alone since the beginning.”
He had been always alone, for as long as he could remember. He had never felt human warmth, having no one to rely on when he was only a child who needed to be protected. Why? Since when? He didn’t know. Someone kept sending him money, so he just lived on.
“The cat is loved by everyone,”
O Shin said. His eyes looked even more mysterious than usual.
“Even god loves the cat.”
The cat looked up at him, blinking. O Shins eyed at it, and then he leaned down, holding Myohan’s head with both hands.
“And that greed makes the cat suffer.”
“Meow—”
Their lips met slowly and parted slowly.
“But what the cat really wants is love from the person he chose.”
‘What you really want,’
Myohan’s head started to buzz. Another memory was coming out. The cat hit the floor with its tail and then growled at O Shin. Myohan heard an unfamiliar voice in his head.
‘Must be affection from the person you chose.’
It wasn’t O Shin. It was kinder, nobler, and softer. Another image formed in his mind. A man was lying on a grassy riverbank and speaking to him. He stretched out a hand to stroke Myohan’s cheek. He could see his face behind a thin fabric that covered it.
‘But that’s not me.’
He had never seen that face before, but it felt so familiar. He recognized his delicate features and the way he looked at him with love. Myohan frowned. At the same time, O Shin covered his eyes with his huge hand and looked down at the cat.
Myohan’s mind went dark the moment his eyes were covered. He soon passed out.
“Meow—”
O Shin easily took him and carried him in his arms after he collapsed. He looked down at the cat again. It was still looking at him, its yellow eyes dangerously persistent. It watched him kiss Myohan’s forehead, and then it got up. O Shin turned to Myohan again.
“This time,”
He spoke to the cat and it stopped, its angry pupils narrowing in an instant. Without looking back, O Shin said sadly,
“Have mercy on me.”
***
Myohan had a familiar dream. He didn’t recognize the forest he was in, but he knew where to go. He also knew it was a dream, but he couldn’t wake up. He just walked, as if he was running away. He could see he was a little boy.
Then he stopped at some point. There was a large lake in front of him, and the sky above it was clear and blue. At the lake’s other side, a familiar man was looking at him. He approached Myohan, embraced his small body, and spoke kindly,
‘It will be okay now.’
He was gentle. Myohan couldn’t see his face as it was covered with a thin fabric, but he could tell his eyes were warm as he looked at him. He placed a hand on Myohan’s forehead and spoke,
‘I will protect you.’
Myohan could feel himself getting smaller. His arms and legs shortened. When he stretched out a hand, he saw a furry paw. The man picked him up and slowly caressed him.
‘You have…’
Wind blew. It made the fabric and the man’s hair flutter. Myohan blinked as he looked up at him. The man’s face was smiling.
‘Such mysterious eyes.’
“Myohan!”
It snapped him out of his thoughts. Myohan turned to look at who was calling him. Yuja raised his glasses and pointed at the back door with irritation.
“Someone wants to see you!”
Yuja was standing in front of him. The classroom was full of boys as usual, and O Shin was quietly staring at him. Myohan looked around, but none of it felt real. He looked down at his own palm for a long time, until Yuja asked,
“Are you sick or something?”