Part 27 (1/2)
”Then I may explain everything,” said he, pulling on faster, as if satisfied. ”It makes it much easier for me as regards my duty to my friend.”
She saw her false position, and felt she was now at his mercy.
”Let us make a bargain,” she said. ”I would not injure _you_; I hope you would not injure _me_. I confess I have deceived Captain Vanguard in this matter. I told him about Gustave, but I said he was a sister's son.
I cannot part with the child. I implore you to let me keep him! If you will consent so far, and abstain from crossing my path at this the turning-point of my whole life's happiness, I will swear to absolve you, formally and in writing, from any claim I may have on your property or your personal freedom; and if ever I can be of service to you, or advance your career in any way, so help my heaven, I will!”
Picard pondered. She had made the very proposal he would himself have broached; but he was too crafty to betray satisfaction, and, to do him justice, felt very loth to lose the child none the less that he had now discovered it was his own. Yet he could not but reflect that so long as Gustave remained with her by his consent, he had the mother at a disadvantage, and could drive her which way he would. Frank Vanguard's domestic happiness would thus be at his mercy, and it was strange if, with consummate knowledge of the world, and utter freedom from scruples, he could not turn such a power to good account.
”Agreed,” said he, as they shot past the Brocas clump, and caught sight of Windsor Castle, looming gigantic through a leaden atmosphere of mist and rain. ”Agreed. We are strangers again from henceforth as regards Vanguard--as regards the world. When we meet in society, that is to be clearly understood. But we are _not_ strangers as regards our boy. Once a week you will write and tell me of his welfare. Once a month you will arrange that I shall see him, either with or without witnesses--I care not which. Stay! I have it. You shall tell Vanguard I am the father of your dead sister's child! Capital! I begin to think I have quite a genius for intrigue!”
”It is such a tissue of falsehood!” she groaned; ”and Frank is so honest--so trustful!”
He ground his teeth; but forced himself to answer with unwavering accents and a smooth brow.
”I cannot enter into the sentiment of the thing. You know me of old.
That is my ultimatum. Take it or leave it. I must run you ash.o.r.e here, and I can show you the short cut to the hotel.”
”Agreed!” she whispered, as he handed her along a quivering plank that let her reach the sh.o.r.e dry-shod. ”Honour?”
”Even among thieves,” he added, with a laugh; and thus was the contract ratified on both sides.
But short as was that by-way from the river to the Castle Hotel, heavily as the rain came down, enforcing the utmost attention to little Gustave--a perishable article indeed ”to be kept dry, this side uppermost”--and fractious as was the deportment of that inexperienced traveller who, thoroughly bewildered with his situation, retained but the one idea of bewailing his lot aloud, while he held on manfully to the new toy, Jin found time to arrive at the n.o.blest, the grandest, and the most important resolution she had ever made in her life.
It has always appeared to me there is one infallible criterion of that rare and mysterious affection which goes by the name of true love. ”How many _dollars_ do you like her?” asked a Yankee of the friend who expatiated on his devotion to a beloved object; thus gauging, as he considered, that devotion by a standard at once unerring, and not to be misconceived. The friend, ”estimating” that he ”liked her a thousand dollars,” proved himself ten times more to be depended on than his rival, who only ”liked her a hundred;” and, in my opinion, there was much knowledge of human nature in this Yankee's mode of valuing an attachment. If you own but five dollars in the world, and you ”love your love five-dollars' worth,” you are very much in love with her indeed, and have come triumphantly through that strongest test of sincerity which consists in self-sacrifice.
There must have been a spark of sacred fire under the lurid flame which Frank had kindled in her breast, or Miss Ross would have escaped a struggle that seemed to tear her heart in pieces during this short wet walk with all its accompanying annoyances--that made her unconscious of heavy rain, draggled garments, and unwelcome company--that, but for a mother's instinct, would have caused her to forget the necessity of sheltering her boy.
She stole a glance--it was well he did not observe it--at the hated form of the man by her side, and all the masculine part of her nature rebelled in the remembrance of its former thraldom. The thought of Frank Vanguard's open brow, of his loving eyes, his manly, kindly smile, and feminine instincts of tender generosity, rose strong within her as she turned scornfully from the suggestion that he, her own, who had chosen her so n.o.bly, so chivalrously, should be at the mercy of such a man as Picard. ”No!” thought Jin, walking on very fast, and hugging Gustave tighter than ever to her breast. ”Better that I should never see him again, than fasten such a clog round his neck! Better that I should lose my one dear chance on earth, than ruin him, degrade him, drag him down to the level of such people as ourselves! I am not to be happy, it seems, in that way; but I have no right to complain since I have got my child. And yet, Frank, Frank, what will you think of me? You will never know the sacrifice I made for you! You will never know what it cost me!
You will never know that I loved you better than my very life!”
While such thoughts were racking heart and brain, it was quite in accordance with Jin's character that her outward manner should be more than ordinarily composed and self-possessed. Arriving at the welcome shelter of the Castle Hotel, she desired a fire to be kindled immediately, and taking very little notice of Picard, busied herself with the child and its wet things. He was quiet enough now; but moaned at intervals as if uneasy in mind rather than in body; but it did not escape a mother's observation that the cheek he pressed against her own was hotter than usual, and though it made his dark eyes s.h.i.+ne so beautifully, she would rather not have seen that brilliant colour so deep and strong. But it was a time for action, not for apprehension, and she turned to Picard with a quiet gesture of authority, such as she would have used towards a servant:
”Be so good as ring the bell,” she said, ”and tell them to get some bread and milk for this little boy. Order tea in an hour, and then go to the barracks and tell Captain Vanguard I am waiting here. I suppose I shall not see you again--good-bye.”
He took the hand she held out, with something of admiration and respect.
”Well, you _are_ a cool one!” he exclaimed. ”I declare, you're cooler even than _me_! In a matter like this, where there's interest in one scale and feeling in the other, I think I can trust you as I would myself!”
She only nodded, resuming the occupation, from which she had turned for a moment, of drying her child's wet socks at the lately-kindled fire.
Picard caught the boy in his arms and smothered him with kisses; then replacing him in his mother's lap, took his departure without another word.
”Where's he going?” said Gustave, making a plunge, to land barefooted on the floor.
”He's going away, dear,” answered Jin, much pre-occupied, and scorching the socks against the bars of the grate. ”And we're going away too.
Don't you want to go away from this nasty room?”
”I want to go to Moley,” answered the boy, in a sing-song that frequent repet.i.tion on the river had rendered mechanical. ”And I want my tupper,”