Volume Iv Part 9 (1/2)

NOTES ON THE LIFE OF ST. TERESA. 1812. [1]

Pref. Part I. p. 51. Letter of Father Avila to Mother Teresa de Jesu.

Persons ought to beseech our Lord not to conduct them by the way of seeing; but that the happy sight of him and of his saints be reserved for heaven; and that, here he would conduct them in the plain, beaten road, &c. * * But if, doing all this, the visions continue, and the soul reaps profit thereby, &c.

In what other language could a young woman check while she soothed her espoused lover, in his too eager demonstrations of his pa.s.sion? And yet the art of the Roman priests,--to keep up the delusion as serviceable, yet keep off those forms of it most liable to detection, by medical commentary!

Life, Part I. Chap. IV. p. 15.

But our Lord began to regale me so much by this way, that he vouchsafed me the favor to give me quiet prayer; and sometimes it came so far as to arrive at union; though I understood neither the one nor the other, nor how much they both deserve to be prized. But I believe it would have been a great deal of happiness for me to have understood them. True it is, that this union rested with me for so short a time, that perhaps it might arrive to be but as of an 'Ave Maria'; yet I remained with so very great effects thereof, that with not being then so much as twenty years old, methought I found the whole world under my feet.

Dreams, the soul herself forsaking; Fearful raptures; childlike mirth.

Silent adorations, making A blessed shadow of this earth!

Ib. Chap. V. p. 24.

I received also the blessed Sacrament with many tears; though yet, in my opinion, they were not shed with that sense and grief, for only my having offended G.o.d, which might have served to save my soul; if the error into which I was brought by them who told me that some things were not mortal sins, (which afterward I saw plainly that they were) might not somewhat bestead me. *** Methinks, that without doubt my soul might have run a hazard of not being saved, if I had died then.

Can we wonder that some poor hypochondriasts and epileptics have believed themselves possessed by, or rather to be the Devil himself, and so spoke in this imagined character, when this poor afflicted spotless innocent could be so pierced through with fanatic pre-conceptions, as to talk in this manner of her mortal sins, and their probable eternal punishment;--and this too, under the most fervent sense of G.o.d's love and mercy!

Ib. p. 43.

True it is, that I am both the most weak, and the most wicked of any living.

What is the meaning of these words, that occur so often in the works of great saints? Do they believe them literally? Or is it a specific suspension of the comparing power and the memory, vouchsafed them as a gift of grace?--a gift of telling a lie without breach of veracity--a gift of humility indemnifying pride.

Ib. Chap. VIII. p. 44.

I have not without cause been considering and reflecting upon this life of mine so long, for I discern well enough that n.o.body will have gust to look upon a thing so very wicked.

Again! Can this first sentence be other than madness or a lie? For observe, the question is not, whether Teresa was or was not positively very wicked; but whether according to her own scale of virtue she was most and very wicked comparatively. See post Chap. X. p. 57-8.

That relatively to the command 'Be ye perfect even as your Father in Heaven is perfect', and before the eye of his own pure reason, the best of men may deem himself mere folly and imperfection, I can easily conceive; but this is not the case in question. It is here a comparison of one man with all others of whom he has known or heard;--'ergo', a matter of experience; and in this sense it is impossible, without loss of memory and judgment on the one hand, or of veracity and simplicity on the other. Besides, of what use is it? To draw off our conscience from the relation between ourselves and the perfect ideal appointed for our imitation, to the vain comparison of one individual self with other men!

Will their sins lessen mine, though they were greater? Does not every man stand or fall to his own Maker according to his own being?

Ib. p. 45.

I see not what one thing there is of so many as are to be found in the whole world, wherein there is need of a greater courage than to treat of committing treason against a king, and to know that he knows it well, and yet never to go out of his presence. For howsoever it be very true that we are always in the presence of G.o.d; yet methinks that they who converse with him in prayer are in his presence after a more particular manner; for they are seeing then that he sees them; whereas others may, perhaps, remain some days in his presence, yet without remembering that he looks upon them.