Part 19 (1/2)

However, that anti-climax was still some way off.

I stuffed the three Liberal papers into my pocket and went to call on Lady Kingscourt. She is the only peeress I am intimate with who moves in really fas.h.i.+onable circles and is both rich and beautiful. It would have been interesting to hear what she said when I pointed out to her that she had been seducing subalterns. She was not at home when I reached her house. The butler told me that she had gone to a bazaar got up to raise funds for the Soldiers' and Sailors' Families' a.s.sociation, in itself a suspicious circ.u.mstance. If I were Lady Kingscourt and my character was attacked as hers was, I should keep clear of any charity with the word soldier in its name. I was sorry to miss her, though I scarcely expected that she would have tried to fascinate me. It is a good many years since I resigned my commission.

The next person I thought of seeing was Gorman. It was nearly five o'clock, so I went to the House of Commons.

Gorman, when I found him, seemed very much pleased to see me, and was in a hospitable mood. He took me to a room, which must have originally been meant for a cellar, and gave me tea.

”I've been ringing you up on the telephone all day,” he said, ”and couldn't get you. Where have you been?”

”Down at the club,” I said, ”talking to Malcolmson about the plot--what you'd call the situation I suppose. You can hardly be expected to admit that there is a plot. Now, do tell me what you think about the situation.”

”d.a.m.n the situation!” said Gorman.

”That,” I said, ”seems the sensible view to take. Is it the one usually held? Is that what they're saying up there?”

I pointed to the ceiling with my thumb. Somewhere above my head, it might be supposed, statesmen with furrowed brows were taking anxious counsel together for the safety of the nation, retiring now and then when utterly exhausted, to d.a.m.n the situation in private rooms.

”Some of them are a bit fussed,” said Gorman. ”Silly a.s.ses! But it isn't that wretched business that I wanted to speak to you about.”

”Good gracious! Do you mean to say that you can talk of anything else?

that you didn't ring me up to tell me what will happen?”

”Nothing will happen,” said Gorman. ”Two or three muddled-headed young fools at the Curragh will get court-martialled. That's all. What I wanted to see you about is this new invention of Tim's. There's really something in it.”

”Gorman,” I said. ”You're fiddling while Rome is burning. How can you reconcile it to your conscience to play with cinematographs when a horrible conspiracy is threatening life and liberty?”

”Surely,” said Gorman, ”you don't really believe that we plotted, as they call it, to murder people in Belfast?”

”I don't know whether you did or not,” I said. ”But that's not the conspiracy I'm alluding to. Look here.”

I pulled out of my pocket the three papers which I had meant for Lady Kingscourt and showed Gorman the articles about the fas.h.i.+onable ladies seducing soldiers.

”You can't expect our side,” I said, ”to sit down under this kind of thing without a struggle. We shall make counter accusations. I shall do it myself if n.o.body else does. I'm warning you beforehand, Gorman, so that you won't be surprised when you find your character in rags.”

Gorman looked at his watch.

”I know you like talking that sort of nonsense,” he said, ”and I don't mind listening, not a bit; but just let me ask you this before you start. Will you come down with me this evening and see Tim's invention?

If you will I'll order a motor from Harrod's or somewhere, and we'll run down after dinner. There's no use going in broad daylight, for we can't see the thing properly till after dark.”

”I shall be delighted,” I said.

”Very well. Excuse me a moment while I go and get on the 'phone to engage the motor.”

I waited, feeling a little sore. I daresay I do talk nonsense and like talking it, but no politician who ever lived has a right to tell me so. I intended to greet Gorman when he returned with the proverb about living in gla.s.s houses and throwing stones. He came back, smiling radiantly. My ill-humour pa.s.sed away at once.

”Now,” he said, ”go on with what you were telling me.

”I pointed out to you,” I said, ”that d.u.c.h.esses, marchionesses, countesses, and other abandoned women of that kind have been flirting with military officers in such a way as to interfere with the governing of this country in accordance with the principles of democracy.”