Part 3 (1/2)
Page 166, we read:--”Another nun, being somewhat infirm, her priest confessed her in her own room. After a time, the invalid penitent found herself in what is called an interesting situation, on which account, the physician declaring that her complaint was dropsy, she was sent away from the convent.”
Page 167:--”A young educanda was in the habit of going down every night to the convent burial-place, where, by a corridor which communicated with the vestry, she entered into a colloquy with a young priest attached to the church. Consumed by an amorous impatience, she was not deterred from these excursions either by bad weather or the fear of being discovered.
”She heard a great noise one night near her. In the thick darkness which surrounded her, she imagined that she saw a viper winding itself around her feet. She was so much overcome by fright that she died from the effects of it a few months later.”
Page 168:--”One of the confessors had a young penitent in the convent.
Every time he was called to visit a dying sister, and on that account pa.s.sed the night in the convent, this nun would climb over the part.i.tion which separated her room from his, and betake herself to the master and director of souls.
”Another, during the delirium of a typhoid fever, from which she was suffering, was constantly imitating the action of sending kisses to her confessor, who stood by the side of her bed. He, covered with blushes on account of the presence of strangers, held a crucifix before the eyes of the penitent, and in a commiserating tone exclaimed,--
”'Poor thing! kiss thy own spouse!'”
Page 168:--”Under the bonds of secrecy, an educanda, of fine form and pleasing manners, and of a n.o.ble family, confided to me the fact of her having received, from the hands of her confessor, a very interesting book (as she described it), which related to the monastic life. I expressed the wish to know the t.i.tle, and she, before showing it to me, took the precaution to lock the door.
”It proved to be the Monaca, by Dalembert, a book, as all know, filled with the most disgusting obscenity.”
Page 169:--”I received once from a monk, a letter in which he signified to me that he had hardly seen me, when 'he conceived the sweet hope of becoming my confessor.' An exquisite of the first water, a fop of scents and euphuism, could not have employed phrases more melodramic, to demand whether he might hope or despair.”
Page 169:--”A priest who enjoyed the reputation of being an incorruptible sacerdote, when he saw me pa.s.s through the parlatorio, used to address me as follows:--
”'Ps, dear, come here! Ps, Ps, come here!'
”These words, addressed to me by a priest, were nauseous in the extreme.
”Finally, another priest, the most annoying of all for his obstinate a.s.siduity, sought to secure my affections at all cost. There was not an image profane poetry could afford him, nor a sophism he could borrow from rhetoric, nor wily interpretation he could give to the Word of G.o.d, which he did not employ to convert me to his wishes. Here is an example of his logic:--
”'Fair daughter,' said he to me one day, 'knowest thou who G.o.d truly is?'
”'He is the Creator of the Universe,' I answered drily.
”'No,--no,--no,--no! that is not enough,' he replied, laughing at my ignorance. 'G.o.d is love, but love in the abstract, which receives its incarnation in the mutual affection of two hearts which idolize each other.
You, then, must not only love G.o.d in His abstract existance, but must also love Him in His incarnation, that is, in the exclusive love of a man who adores you. _Quod Deus est amor, nec colitur, nisi amando._'
”'Then,' I replied, 'a woman who adores her own lover would adore Divinity itself?'
”'a.s.suredly,' reiterated the priest over and over again, taking courage from my remark, and chuckling at what seemed to him to be the effect of his catechism.
”'In that case,' said I hastily, 'I should select for my lover rather a man of the world than a priest.'
”'G.o.d preserve you, my daughter! G.o.d preserve you from that sin!' added my interlocutor, apparently frightened. 'To love a man of the world, a sinner, a wretch, an unbeliever, an infidel! Why, you would go immediately to h.e.l.l.
The love of a priest is a sacred love, while that of a profane man is infamy; the faith of a priest emanates from that granted to the holy Church, while that of the profane is false,--false as the vanity of the world. The priest purifies his affections daily in communion with the Holy Spirit: the man of the world (if he ever knows love at all) sweeps the muddy crossings of the street with it day and night.
”'But it is the heart, as well as the conscience, which prompts me to fly from the priests,' I replied.
”'Well, if you cannot love me because I am your confessor, I will find means to a.s.sist you to get rid of your scruples. We will place the name of Jesus Christ before all our affectionate demonstration, and thus our love will be a grateful offering to the Lord, and will ascend fragrant with perfume to Heaven, like the smoke of the incense of the sanctuary. Say to me, for example, ”I love you in Jesus Christ; last night I dreamed of you in Jesus Christ;” and you will have a tranquil conscience, because in doing this you will sanctify every transport of your love.'
”Several circ.u.mstances not indicated here, by the way, compelled me to come in frequent contact with this priest afterwards, and I do not therefore give his name.