Part 18 (1/2)

”You didn't hit me.” The words were spoken so softly I wasn't sure I'd heard him correctly.

”Huh?” I looked at him with confusion written plainly on my face.

He still didn't look away from the sky. ”When I kissed you tonight, you didn't hit me like the first time, and something tells me you didn't mean to hit me the first time.”

I turned away, glancing to my left. My hair swept over my shoulder, hiding the profile of my face from his view. I swallowed thickly, unsure how to respond. He was right. I hadn't meant to hit him the first time. I'd actually been enjoying the kiss, but then, suddenly, it was like I wasn't there anymore and it wasn't Liam who was on top of me.

I couldn't explain that to him, though. He'd ask me more questions, and I'd either have to lie or say nothing, and I was so sick of doing both. Things would be so much easier if Liam was a dumb surfer who only cared about waves and s.e.x. But Liam was observant. He saw everything even when you thought he saw nothing.

That made him a threat to me.

I'd almost made up my mind to ignore his statement and get up and walk back to the house when he spoke again.

”What would you do if I kissed you again right now?”

My breath stole from my lungs, and my body slowly moved back toward him.

Try as I might, I couldn't stay away from him. I didn't know what it was about him that was so impossible for me to ignore.

His lips lifted in a half-smile. ”You're not running, so I take that as a good sign.”

He scooted closer to me, and his tongue flicked out to wet his lips. I swallowed thickly and my heart pounded like a drum in my ears. Surely he could see it in my throat.

”Why you?” he whispered, lightly caressing his finger over my cheek and down my throat. ”Why are you the one to make me feel again?” His eyes were hooded, and I wasn't sure if that was from the amount of alcohol in his system or l.u.s.t.

I really hoped he wasn't that drunk. I didn't want to wake up in the morning and have him act as if he hadn't confessed all of this to me. Not only for my sake, but for his as well.

I knew firsthand how much it sucked trying to be something you're not.

His jean-covered leg brushed mine, and he slid his hand around my throat to cup the back of my neck. His eyes flickered to my lips and then back up to my eyes. He didn't move any further, and the look in his eyes told me the ball was in my court.

I swallowed past the lump in my throat and tried to ignore the beat of my heart.

Ba-dum, ba-dum, ba-dum. It thudded in my ears, drowning out the sound of the waves cras.h.i.+ng against the sh.o.r.e.

Liam's shoulders sagged dejectedly, and he started to pull away.

Panic seized me.

”No,” I pleaded, placing my hand over his arm, urging him not to let go.

He froze, the question in his eyes growing.

I took a deep breath and reached out, sliding my hands over his solid chest covered in a thin cotton s.h.i.+rt. I felt his heart beating madly behind his ribs. Almost as fast as mine.

My fingers shook as I grasped the collar of his s.h.i.+rt and leaned in closer.

I'd never kissed a guy before.

I mean, I'd been kissed, but I'd never been the kisser.

This was an entirely new experience for me, and I wasn't sure what to make of it.

I knew one thing, though-I liked that he was giving me the choice.

Not that I hadn't enjoyed the other two kisses-you know, before I smacked him the first time-but this one, it was going to mean the world to me in a way I could never explain to him. I studied every feature of his face from his dark heavy brows, to his carved cheekbones, and full lips. I even studied the area around us-the sand, the moon, the stars. And I listened closely to the sounds of the night-the chirps of insects, the roar of the ocean, and off in the distance the twinkling of a piano. I wanted to remember everything about the moment because it was a first for me.

Each second felt like a minute as I leaned in closer.

Closer.

Closer.

Closer.

I pressed my lips against his. Neither of us moved at first, like we were both memorizing the feel of the other, and then...

And then it was like a bomb went off.

The air cracked around us with electricity as the kiss grew in fervor. My fingers locked around the back of his neck, my body pressed fully into his. His hands slid down to my waist where he grasped my hips and pulled me onto his lap. My knees dug into the wet sand, and I felt the fabric of my sweatpants grow damp. The new position gave me more leverage, and I grasped his stubbled cheeks in my hands. I leaned down, deepening the kiss, and unconsciously rolled my hips against his.

I let out a soft moan that was quickly swallowed by his groan. His fingers tangled in my hair as he held me to him. His tongue swiped against mine, and my nails dug into his arms as I tried desperately to keep myself upright.

Note to self: Liam Wade's kisses make you lightheaded.

I broke the kiss, and his breath fell across my lips. His hands tightened in my hair, holding me in place so he could rest his forehead against mine.

I closed my eyes and heard him let out a soft chuckle. When I opened them he was full on grinning.

”Hi,” I said stupidly.

His smile never wavered. ”Hi.” He kissed the end of my nose in a tender gesture I wasn't prepared for. I'm pretty sure my heart skipped a beat or two.

He wrapped his arms around me then and held me.

Just held me.

And I didn't realize until that moment how much I needed that. To have someone hold me and feel comfort.

For the moment, at least, it felt like everything would be okay.

But I knew I couldn't let the magic of the night fool me. Daylight would come, and with it the harsh reality that I couldn't have this.

I couldn't get attached.

I couldn't.