Part 18 (2/2)
Then, curious what she had really said, he did a spot mental translation: ”Creep!” she had screeched. ”Get your tail out of gear, stupid!”
On the whole, he preferred the euphemistic mode.
As they flew, slowly, he thought of something else. ”How can the ageless Ring of Air be in a castle that was constructed only a year ago?”
”I fear that in heaven I am not required to know,” she replied gently enough. But a tall branch of a tree they were flying over abruptly wilted, and he realized that it was not heaven she had actually invoked.
”Who controls that Ring?”
”Why, that is your ill.u.s.trious mother, the Simurgh.” A pa.s.sing flock of whitebirds lost elevation as its V formation melted into an x.x.x formation. Exactly what twist had she given to the concept of ”mother”?
”Then this must have occurred with her acquiescence,” he squawked.
”She surely indulged in an eloquent preening,” she agreed. A nearby cloud turned red, though it was neither sunrise nor sunset.
”Perhaps I can figure it out,” he squawked, for he always liked a good riddle.
”You may do whatever you like, with whatever appendage is convenient, handsome avian,” she agreed. A dark swirl of smoke appeared near her mouth, as the heat caused the air to burn explosively.
”I suspect it is this way,” he squawked. ”Castle Maidragon was made magically by the Three Little Princesses-Melody, Harmony, and Rhythm-in their adult guise as exists on the world of Ptero. Any single princess is a sorceress with great power of magic. Any two princesses working together square that power. When all three work together, that power is cubed. Therefore they brought a phenomenal focus of magic to bear on the project. This enabled them to conjure an entire castle from nothing, and to stock it with all manner of relevant artifacts. They must have liked the notion of having something invaluable in its storage vault, so conjured the Ring of Air from its natural location in the floating Nameless Castle. Perhaps Nimby and Chlorine were otherwise occupied at the time and so were not aware of its departure.”
”Nimby and Chlorine were making love,” she agreed. More smoke appeared, rising in a roiling ball that soon formed a mushroom-shaped cloud. The average harpy put a rather negative interpretation on that particular process.
Fortunately the highest pennant of Castle Maidragon now came into view. ”We are almost there,” he squawked, relieved.
She sent a sidelong glance his way. ”But we were just beginning to speak of love,” she murmured. ”Must we end it so soon?”
He wasn't sure what she had actually said, but a nearby swarm of gnasty gnats abruptly collapsed into a heart-shaped swoon. That was more alarming than a smoke ball. Perhaps it was time to end his mental reversals, so he would not be confused when they entered the castle. He performed the mental correction.
”As soon as I obtain the Ring, our a.s.sociation can dissolve,” he squawked.
”Too bad for you, puckerbeak!” Garnishee screeched. ”You'll never know what a really hot piece of tail is.”
Sim was destined to know all things, eventually, but he thought that he could afford to wait a century or two for that particular information.
They glided down toward the castle. A dragon appeared, and flew up to intercept them, stoking its fire. It had batlike wings, bright green purple-tipped scales, and an aggressive stare.
”Watch it, hotbox!” the harpy screeched. That hardly helped.
The dragon brought its snout around, readying its fire.
”Becka!” Sim squawked. ”It's me, Sim!”
The dragon did a double-take, then nodded. It looped around and led the way down to the castle with a fine spiral.
When they landed, the dragon transformed into a human girl of about sixteen with blonde hair and brown eyes. ”Sim!” she cried, running forward to hug him. ”What are you doing keeping company with a zombie harpy?”
”I have to find the Ring of Air,” he squawked. Because she knew him, she understood him. ”Garnishee Zombie-Harpy knows where it is. She says it is at Castle Maidragon, so we came here.”
Becka turned to the harpy. ”h.e.l.lo, Garnishee.”
”Go ram a red-hot poker up your-”
”Harpies are hostile by nature,” Sim squawked, drowning her out for the moment. ”They don't mean anything by it.”
”Yes we do!” the harpy screeched. ”We mean it literally!”
”That's all right,” Becka said. ”I speak their language.” She turned again to the zombie. ”Up yours first, sidewise, twice, s...o...b..ain!” she screeched.
Sim's beak dropped. Garnishee's eyes widened. ”You're one of us!” she screeched, embracing the girl with her dirty wings.
Becka turned dragon just long enough to extricate herself, then went back to girl form. ”No, I was possessed by the Sea Hag for a while. I learned something. None of it good, but I remembered.”
”The Sea Hag! She is our G.o.ddess!”
”I'm sure. I never encountered a meaner spirit. Now where do you say this Ring is?”
”In the Forbidden Chamber.”
There was half a silence. Then Becka turned to Sim. ”That's a problem.”
”I know it,” Sim squawked. ”She said I'd be sorry. I thought she was just being mean.”
”I was being mean,” Garnishee screeched indignantly.
”You mean it's not really there?”
”Of course it's really there. Now what are you going to do, smart behind?”
”I could get annoyed, if I really tried,” Sim mutter-squawked. ”It is not safe to open that door.”
”It certainly isn't,” Becka agreed. ”Well, come on in, and we'll think about it. I don't receive compatible company often.”
”Compatible!” Garnishee screeched, outraged.
”You excluded, of course, stench puss.”
”That's better,” the zombie agreed, mollified.
They crossed the drawbridge and entered the castle. It was well-kept inside, with all its halls, chambers, stairways, and incidental turrets clean. There was a smell of chocolate about it.
”What's that stink?” Garnishee demanded.
”The princesses liked to make little castles out of chocolate,” Becka explained. ”Then they would eat them. This is a real castle, but some of the blocks are chocolate. I don't know whether they forgot, or maybe it was just mischief. I try not to nibble on the blocks as I go by.”
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