Part 12 (1/2)

”I have to go,” Ellie snapped. ”I'm bad company right now. Hope the band is good.” Napkins fluttered to the floor in the wake of her rapid departure.

”She'll feel better tomorrow,” Marian muttered.

”Incoming,” Wen whispered.

”Huh?” About then Marian realized Libby had left the counter and was making a beeline for her. She had something in her hand.

”Hi,” Marian said, knowing she was bright red. ”Thanks again for the lift.”

71.

”You're welcome. It was no bother, really. But I think this fell out of one of your bags. Not my brand. I, um, didn't have anything to put it in. Sorry.”

Marian took the tampon box with all the nonchalance she could manage. ”Mine. Sorry I left it.” She quickly stuffed it into her backpack.

”I had a feeling I'd run into you here.”

”It's a habit.” Marian didn't recognize the pathetically squeaky voice that was coming out of her throat. Feeling very awkward, she said, ”Everybody, this is Libby.”

”Liddy. Sorry, it's Liddy.”

Mary Jane laughed outright. ”Marian is usually clear on her facts.”

”I didn't get a good look at it,” Marian muttered. She had not thought it was possible to blush harder than she already was, but she'd been wrong.

Liddy shrugged, but Marian thought she looked annoyed. ”It happens a lot. n.o.body wants to believe I was named after some reac-tionary nutcase my biological father idealized. When G. Gordon had his radio show I wanted to just change it to Libby, believe me.”

”It must be a trial,” Wen observed.

”Only around the politically correct, and we have lots of those in Berkeley. One righteous woman told me I ought to change it to something woman-identified, as if I'd chosen it, and continuing to use it was an affront to ovaries everywhere.”

Jersey grunted in agreement. ”I'm Jersey, and I was told recently that my name glorified mobsters.”

”Ignorance isn't anyone's exclusive property, is it?” Mary Jane peered into her nearly empty cup. ”That went down way too easily.”

Marian sensed it was that moment when she ought to ask Libby-Liddy, you fool!-to join them. But the last time she'd done that it had been Robyn. But if any of the other women did it, Liddy became her casual coffee date type person, not Marian's.

72.

Oh, bother. Desperately, she tried to sound businesslike. ”We got a new text on medical ethics you might be interested in.”

She felt the combined gazes of all of her friends on her face.

Liddy's smile wasn't quite relaxed. ”Thank you, that's very helpful. I'll look for it-same call number?”

”Yes. It should be there tomorrow.”

”Great. Well, thanks.” Liddy nodded and went back to the counter for her latte. The two students she'd been talking to had already left. Without looking in Marian's direction she slipped out the door again.

After a long silence and a great deal of ice-chewing, Mary Jane observed, ”Really, Marian, I didn't know you had it in you.”

73.

6.

Liddy was out the door of the Java House before she realized she wished someone had asked her to join them. Marian, maybe. Yes, that would have been nice. Marian was strange, but interesting. It bothered her that Marian had gotten her name wrong, but it had happened before. Robyn had gotten it right, so it was no indicator of personality.

She toyed with the idea of going back inside on some pretext.

The area where they were all seated was all the way on the other side of the counters. She could have pretended to study the art exhibit, or to be contemplating the wildly colorful selection of travel mugs, but that would have only looked casual if she hadn't already scurried out the door.

It was definitely cooler than it had been. Liddy guessed eighty, but with the humidity it was hard to gauge. With a sigh she turned in the direction of the live music she'd heard from the far end of the 74 Pedestrian Mall. It was a pleasing mix of bluegra.s.s and pop. She skirted people playing chess with pieces the size of ten-year-olds and dodged the lemonade vendor moving his cart. It was crowded and she supposed she would be lucky to find a place to sit.

As she approached the nexus of the play structure, fountain and hotel entrance, she saw that she'd supposed rightly. Parents already occupied curbs, benches and retaining walls that faced the enormous jungle gym. The fountain had been turned off to make room for the band. Folding chairs had been set up in a crescent around the band, but all were taken by music lovers.

The music was good, though. She could manage for a while, standing. Feeling homesick, she bought a falafel and ate it while leaning against a column outside the hotel.

She watched cl.u.s.ters of people meet, mingle, disperse and regroup. If her gaydar was working, ten to fifteen percent of the crowd-including the parents-was lesbian and it was, well, comforting. It all looked so normal.

Curious about how women paired off-Berkeley was her only data sample so far-she took note of the number of obviously butch/femme couples. At first she thought there weren't that many.

Everyone was dressed the same, in shorts and tank tops or T-s.h.i.+rts.

It was too warm for anything else.

Okay, next to the slide was a definite butch. The shorts were men's, the T was black and her hair was buzzed to a quarter-inch flattop.

It became an interesting exercise after that. Subtle cues she hadn't really considered before were more obvious to her. Tops with scalloped hems and hair accessories might indicate a femme, while a baggy tank top over a sport bra and long, plain shorts could denote a butch. Then a trim woman in square-legged men's running shorts and a tank top graced with a bow and spaghetti straps came into view. Mixed signals, Liddy thought. That or she just wears what feels comfortable. And why not?

She caught a glimpse of herself in the hotel windows. She supposed the ponytail was the biggest hint that she had femme tenden-75 cies. That, nail polish and the strappy sandals she'd chosen over her usual Tevas. She sometimes took umbrage at the femme label, however. It depended on who used it and what was meant by it.

Something slammed into the side of her knee. She looked down in time to see a toddler taking a very deep breath. When the breath came out, the screech nearly drowned out the band. Liddy looked around frantically for parents. People were looking. They probably thought she was killing the kid.