Part 28 (1/2)
”I'm not paranoid.”
”Mike, I don't have time for this. Do you or don't you?”
He shrugged and loosened his collar.
”Let's just say I'm diversified for all contingencies. Including the total collapse of the U.S. banking system.”
”Good . . . Good.”
I pushed an envelope across the table to him.
”I want you to keep this somewhere discreet for me. Don't open it. Get it off your hands right away.”
”What is it?”
”I can't say. But if something ever happens to me, get it and open it. There's another envelope inside. It's already addressed. If something bad happens, mail it. That's it.”
”Jeremy, are you on drugs?”
”Please. Just do this for me. It's important.”
He leaned back in his chair and sighed.
”I'm not an idiot, Jer. Whatever you think of me, I didn't get where I am by being stupid. This is insurance, fine, I get it. But you want my help, you gotta tell me what I'm getting into. What is it, gambling debts? Is this mob s.h.i.+t? Young f.u.c.king c.o.c.ky lawyers, think they're so smart, get into poker, I've seen it before. That's what you get for going to school so close to Atlantic City. Listen, if you're in trouble, I'll pay off your debts. But it won't be free. You'll pay me back with interest. You have to learn consequences. But at least I won't break your legs, right?”
”Your money can't fix this.”
The words came out harsher than I meant. I sounded bitter. I saw his face twitch. His composure came back quickly, but the words hung in the air between us.
”Mike, I need your help. Please.”
He blinked a few times and ran a hand through his hair. It was thick but the hairline was definitely receding. I noticed he had the hint of a double chin. This is my brother, I kept thinking to myself. Jesus, he looked like a middle-aged man.
He smiled, but it was weaker, less c.o.c.ky. Strangely enough, I found myself missing the c.o.c.kiness.
”Remember when we used to play at the creek?” he asked me.
”Yeah.”
”There was that dog. Belonged to Mr. Reynolds. Remember that?”
”Mean animal,” I said.
”He was. Remember the time he was lost, and we found him down in the creek?”
”After a big storm, right? He was pinned down, under a tree.”
”You tried to help him.”
”I did.”
”And what did he do?”
”He bit the s.h.i.+t out of my hand.”
Mike nodded at the memory.
”I'm gonna help you,” he said. ”And I'm gonna play it any way you want. You want me to hold this letter in a mystery bank and never read what's inside? Fine. I'll do that for you. You're a smart guy, Jeremy. Smarter than I am. No, don't say anything, I know it's true. I busted my way through. I'm a bull in a china shop, I know. If you think this will fix whatever's out to get you, I believe you. But you have to promise me one thing.”
”What?”
”If this package gets them to leave you alone, then you're finished with them, right?”
I didn't say anything.
”That's it. You understand? Get them off your back and go live your life. Is that what you plan to do? Can you promise me that?”
I looked down at my hands.
”I know you,” Mike said. ”You have rules. Principles. Always have. Well, I have a different philosophy. Look out for number one. Because no one else is going to. You don't understand that, because you've been lucky. You've never had a real problem. Mom and Dad always babied you. I'm sorry to put it like that, but it's true. If I'm gonna help you, you've got to promise me you're not gonna keep messing with these people. You have leave it alone. Live and let live. Okay?”
I took a deep breath.
I thought of Sarah.
We can't let that go. If we do . . .
”I'm trying to help you,” he said. ”I'm trying to save you from yourself.”
”I know, Mike.”
”Promise me. Jer, promise me.”
I felt my whole life branching, tearing in half. I shook my head.
”I can't.”
He closed his eyes. I watched his face. His good looks, a little worn but still there. I could remember the smell of the gra.s.s, playing down in that creek with him, even twenty years later.
”Then I can't help you,” Mike said. He slid the envelope back across the table.
”Are you serious?”
He nodded.
”Mike, I need you.”