Chapter 8 (1/2)

Cry Me A Sad River - Episode One – Parts 8 to 12

Warning: violence.

08

Yi Yao sat on the toilet bowl. Her heart fell.

How many weeks had it been since it came? Three weeks? Or had it been almost a month?

Unspeakable terror caused her to clench her fists so tightly that her joints turned white.

Only when her mother’s rough knocking sounded on the door did she pull up her pants quickly before opening the door.

Expected, she heard her mother day, “Closed the door for so long, do you want to die inside!”

“It’d be better if I died.” Yi Yao replied in her heart.

The canteen was also full of people.

Qi Ming only found a seat for two after carrying his lunch box for a very long time, he gestured for Yi Yao to come over and sit down.

Yi Yao ate very slowly. The few times Qi Ming turned to look at her, she was holding her chopsticks unmoving, staring at her bowl as if flowers were about to sprout, Qi Ming had to knock his chopsticks on the edge of her lunchbox numerous times for her to pay attention, only then did she turn and smile slightly.

They ate until the canteen almost emptied out. Only then did Yi Yao and Qi Ming finish eating and leave.

The hand wash basin at the back of the canteen is empty of people.

The taps were lined horizontally. Occasionally, drips of water drop from them.

Qi Ming folded up his sleeves and placed the lunchbox under the tap, the moment he turned it on, he felt the cold seep into his bones, and he pulled his hand back, startled.

Yi Yao reached over and takes his lunchbox before turning on the water to clean it.

Qi Ming stared at her hand that was was.h.i.+ng the lunchbox, she didn’t have the long nails girls liked to keep, neither did she have the soft and smooth skin from pampering like other girls. She had a cold sore on her pinky, a small open wound on it.

He looked at her quietly wiping his stainless steel lunchbox, as a rock just rolled into an unknown place in his heart, rolling towards an unknown corner. And then a soft sound can be heard through the darkness.

He couldn’t help but raise his hand, reaching over to the girl’s slightly lowered head.

“Are you just going to rub your hand that’s covered with pig oil on my hair?” Yi Yao turned towards him, a faint smile on her face.

“Your words are really……” Qi Ming frowned, slightly angry.

“Really what”, the girl turned, her expression hard, “Really like my mom?”

The sound of water splas.h.i.+ng from the tap.

As if a slide gate had been opened, as long as n.o.body closed it, it’d be pouring out water constantly. Until everything became vacuum.

On the way back to the cla.s.sroom from the canteen was a quiet forest trail. The branches of the wutong trees were bare in winter.

The leaves were scattered across the ground. Yellow. Red. Slowly, they decay in the rainwater from the day before yesterday. The smell of trees permeated the air.

“Why do I feel that there’s the smell of mould.” Yi Yao said suddenly as she stepped on the leaves beneath her feet.

Qi Ming said nothing. He moved ahead by himself until he realized that there was no sound beside him, only then did he turn and see Yi Yao a few meters away from him.

“What’s wrong?” Qi Ming raised an eyebrow.

“Can you buy something for me in the afternoon.”

“Sure. What do you want?”

09

A bird flew overhead, leaving behind its sharp calls, harshly slicing a transparent wound across the air.  The hand that was covered in water was exposed in the wind, numb, almost losing feeling.

The two stood face to face. No one spoke.

The wind was about to blow away all of the clouds in the sky.

The sky of the winter season was always so sharply distant. The wind seemed to have been blowing through the whole of the season. Blowing until nothing was left aside from the ghastly white light that beat down solidly from the sky.

“Is it Li Zhe’s?”

“Who else.”

“You two……did it?”

“Did it.”

A conversation so simple that there was no chance for an alternative way of understanding. Due to its simplicity, the fact that there could be no misunderstandings, no wrongs, a pained feeling intensified in his chest. Like a wound that hadn’t been wrapped properly, every single action rubbed the gauze across the wound even more. Slowly, back and forth, a dull pain.

Qi Ming set a foot down on the ground to support the bicycle and him. In front of him was a red light. All the cars stopped.

Back when she first decided to be with Li Zhe, Qi Ming knew.

Yi Yao’s reason had been so simple that it was laughable. “He’d fight for her.” “Handsome.” “Waited for her at the school gate after school to send her home.”

At that time, Qi Ming had even muttered, “These are all things I can do too.” His youthful hot blood flowed through his chest. His brows were furrowed, his words biting.

“All mammals have one natural instinct, that is to draw on advantages and avoid the disadvantages, just like the microorganisms in high salt concentrations will move towards a water droplet with a lower concentration, n.o.body would fall in love with trouble”, the smile on Yi Yao’s face had been cold, “I am a big trouble.”

And after that, every time Qi Ming saw Li Zhe at the school gate, every time he saw Yi Yao receive fresh flowers, every time he saw Yi Yao skip cla.s.s to find Li Zhe, he’d feel as if someone pierced a large syringe into his body suddenly, and then draw out everything in it bit by bit.

The emptiness could never be filled.

Every time he stepped on the petal, QI Ming felt as if he was pumping air into his body, pumping constantly until he body becomes filled like a balloon, bloating, until near explosion.

He rode his bike for over an hour until the edge of the city. Only then did QI Ming feel that no one would recognize him and stopped for a pharmacy. He found the family planning counter and lowered his eyes before placing his finger on the gla.s.s counter top, saying, “I need a pregnancy test.”

The auntie behind the counter had a mixed expression on her face, the tilt of her lips was mocking. She took a box out and tossed it onto the gla.s.s top, pointing towards the cas.h.i.+er on the right, “Pay over there.”

After paying, QI Ming placed the box into his bag, when he pushed the door open, he heard the auntie’s pa.s.sive words, “Young girls now, tsk tsk, don’t even know what to do with themselves when they see a handsome boy.”

Qi Ming threw his backpack into the basket in front of his bicycle before raising his hand to wipe away the hot tears in his eyes.