Part 7 (1/2)
”Actually, yes I am. I'm just not telling you what you want to hear.”
”Yeah. Okay. Fine. So what now?”
”Now, I need to ask you a question.”
”What?”
”You aren't going to like it.”
”Yeah, so why should my day suddenly start getting better?” I returned sarcastically. ”What's the question?”
I heard her take in a deep breath, and a second later she hit me with the last thing I expected. ”Is Felicity guilty? Did she kill those men?”
”h.e.l.l no! How can you ask me that?! What happened to being on my side?!”
”It's my job, Rowan. I have to know what I'm up against and whom I'm defending. You're absolutely certain she's innocent?”
”Yes,” I returned harshly. ”And don't ever ask me that again.”
”I won't. Not you. But you need to understand that I'm going to have to ask Felicity the same thing.”
”And you'll get the same answer.”
Here we had a slight problem. And, that problem came in the form of the fact that I wasn't entirely sure I was telling the truth with that last comment. The night Felicity had been taken into custody at the East side motel, the suspicious fingers were already being pointed and the investigation underway. When I discussed it with her, she had told me that she wasn't even certain in her own mind that she hadn't committed the crimes. The Lwa possession had caused substantial blocks of time to be missing from her memory, and that frightened her. It didn't do much for me either, but I still knew she was innocent. Why, when the police apparently had evidence to the contrary, I couldn't say; but the fact remained that I knew it beyond any doubt in my mind.
Unfortunately, something else I knew was that my wife was still harboring distrust in her own sanity. And, because of her personal history within the bondage and D/S subculture, she was finding it easy to convince herself that perhaps she really was the killer. The truth was, when Jackie asked her the question, she was very likely to say, ”I don't know.” What was even more frightening was that it was going to be a bit before Jackie got there. Given Felicity's mental state, depending on what she was told by the police between now and then, her answer could well be ”Yes. I think I'm guilty.”
That single possibility, all by itself, scared me as much as anything ever could right now.
”Find a way to get her home, Jackie. I know that's asking a lot, but I need her home. I need her home NOW.”
”I'll do what I can,” she offered. ”But, you need to be prepared for this.”
”Prepared?” Incredulity filled my voice. ”Okay, then why don't you tell me how I'm supposed to prepare myself for my wife spending time in jail on a bogus murder charge.”
”I wish I knew, Ro...”
The end of her sentence was truncated by an annoying beep issuing from the earpiece of my phone. Lately, I had been ignoring the call-waiting when it chimed in, due to a recent resurgence of mysterious hang-ups that had been plaguing us off and on for the past few years. Under the circ.u.mstances, however, I thought it might be a good idea to answer it this time.
”I've got another call coming in. Can you hold for a sec?”
”Listen, I'm almost to my car,” she replied. ”Why don't you go ahead and answer the call. I'll get back to you when I get to the police station and have a handle on things.”
”Don't you want me to meet you there?”
”Absolutely not. There's nothing you can do at this point, and emotionally you're a bomb looking for a place to explode. You'd do nothing but cause trouble and make things worse. Just stay right there while they're searching the house, and don't do anything stupid.”
The insistent beep chimed in again.
”What do you mean?”
”I mean just stay there and don't do anything,” she instructed, heavily emphasizing the last word. ”I need to concentrate on your wife right now, so I don't need to be worrying about you too.”
I answered in a clipped tone. ”Yeah. Fine. Okay. Later.”
I didn't wait for her to say goodbye. I reached out and stabbed the off-hook switch on the telephone's base with my finger, held it for a second, and then released it. A second later I heard the telltale click rattling in the earpiece as the call I had just been on was disconnected.
”h.e.l.lo?” I said into the mouthpiece.
”Rowan,” a familiar voice floated into my ear. ”How are you doing?”
I sighed, half from relief and half from frustration. It obviously wasn't a hang-up, but it also wasn't someone calling to tell me this had all been a terrible mistake either. Of course, logically I knew that wasn't going to happen, but under stress we tend to create fantastic resolutions for situations simply in order to maintain hope, and that was but one of the happy endings bouncing around inside my skull at the moment.
”I've been better, Helen,” I replied, my tone flat.
”I know, Rowan. Benjamin just called and told me what happened.”
”I suppose he wants you to find out if I'm still mad at him,” I quipped.
I knew I shouldn't be taking my anger with her brother, and the situation, out on her; but I just couldn't help myself. The way I saw it, everyone in my path was a potential enemy at this point.
”Actually, Rowan, no, he does not. I believe he is fully expecting you to be angry with him for some time to come. He has resigned himself to that.”
”Very astute observation on his part,” I a.s.serted. ”Mainly because he's right.”
”He was forced to make an extremely hard decision.”
”Well, I've got some bad news for him. He decided wrong. Felicity is innocent and he knows it.”
”I am speaking of his decision to handle the arrest rather than allow someone else from the department to do so.”
Apparently, Jackie had been correct. Still, it didn't change the fact that he had led my wife out of the house in handcuffs.
”Yeah, well, he just might have been wrong on that count too.”
”Be that as it may, it really is not my point, Rowan.”
”I'm listening.”
”He is concerned.”
”Yeah, well no offense, Helen, but I've got other things on my mind right now, so if he's looking for absolution tell him to try a confessional.”
”He is not concerned about forgiveness. He is worried about you.”
”Could've fooled me.”