Part 20 (1/2)

”I don't care if I ever use that toilet up there,” she said. ”What I care about water? I drink before I go to Bayonne; I drink when I come back home. That's what I been doing all my life anyhow.”

I looked at her. I didn't know what to say.

”Why he got to be the one?” she said. ”All the others want it, why him?”

”He wrote the letters for us, Lena,” I said. ”He read the newspapers and the Bible for us. And we never chastized n.o.body else like we chastized him.”

”We didn't do that for this,” she said.

”Did we know what we was doing it for?” I asked her.

”I knowed what I was doing it for,” she said. ”I wanted him to be a teacher or something.”

”He is a teacher,” I said.

”You can't teach from the grave,” she said.

”Jimmy's not dead, Lena,” I said.

”Not dead yet, you mean,” she said. ”I'm almost forced to go out there and tell Robert to stop this thing from happening.”

”That won't stop Jimmy,” I said.

”It'll stop him from getting killed tomorrow,” she said.

”Look at them other children,” I said. ”They didn't get killed.”

”You mean all of them didn't get killed,” she said. ”And they wasn't in Bayonne either. The likes of Albert Cluveau has not vanished from this earth.”

We didn't say nothing for a long time. She just sat there holding her hand, looking down at the floor. I reckoned she had already cried all she could cry.

”How you going?” I asked.

”Going up and see Olivia,” she said. ”If not her, reckoned I'll catch the bus.”

”I'll go with you,” I said.

”Get your rest,” Lena said. ”I'll let you know what she say.”

Albert was getting ready to leave, too, and Lena got Albert to walk up the quarters with her. About an hour later she came back and told me Olivia said she would take us.

”She don't mind if they put her off the place?” I asked.

”She done saved up a few dollars,” Lena said.

Mary got up the next morning just after sun-up and told me if I was going to Bayonne with her I better get up and get myself ready. I asked her when did she make up her mind to go. She said she made up her mind when she saw nothing was go'n keep me from going. Who was go'n look after me when they knocked me down. I said the Lord. She said the Lord might be busy helping somebody else, and it wouldn't look right for Him just to drop that person and come help me. I got up and said my prayers. After I had pushed back my bar and made up my bed I went in the kitchen to have my coffee.

”You better eat something solid,” Mary said. ”You might have to do some fast shuffling.”

”You can give me a bisquit with my coffee,” I said.

”I mean grits and eggs,” Mary said. ”When you fall I want to make sure it's a billy club, not hungriness.”

”Don't give me too much,” I said.

Mary had opened the back door and cool air came in. I looked out at the sun, orange color on the gra.s.s. Usually I liked this time of day, the freshness, but today I felt something funny in the air. My heart was jumping too much. I wasn't scared I might get hurt-when you get to be a hundred and eight or a hundred and nine you forget what scared is: I felt something funny in the air, but I didn't know what it was. I just sat there looking out at the gra.s.s, and I could remember the times when I used to bend over and run my hands in the dew. But of course that was long long ago. Now, all I can do is walk in it sometime, and I got to be careful doing even that.

”Air feels funny,” I said.

”How do funny air feel?” Mary said.

”Just feel funny,” I said.

Mary brought the food to the table and she sat down across from me.

”I know I cause you trouble,” I said.

”Don't start that,” Mary said. ”You don't cause me no trouble.”

”You don't have to go, Mary,” I said.

”Staying on this place don't mean that much to me,” she said.

”Where you going if they put you off?” I asked her.

”I don't know,” she said. ”Probably be somewhere close 'round you.”

”Everything I own is yours when I die,” I said.

”Don't try to pay me, Miss Jane,” she said. ”I was brought up too good for that.”

”I'm not trying to pay you,” I said. ”But I love you much as you love me, and that's all I have to give. I want you to have my all.”

”I have your love and your respect, and that's enough,” she said.

”I want you to have my rocking chair and my sewing machine,” I said.

”All right,” Mary said. ”But they'll have to kill me first. Then somebody else can get everything.”

”I didn't mean today,” I said.

”That's right, today we secured,” Mary said. ”I wonder what we go'n do to turn them back-sing?”

”And maybe little clapping,” I said.

”Well, I got a feeling them things in Bayonne go'n want more than just spirituals today,” Mary said. ”Lot lot more.”