Part 22 (2/2)

”Of course, I don't object to people going to church. I should be there myself if it were not that--”

He hesitated. I thought he might be searching for an appropriate text of Scripture so I helped him.

”Your a.s.s,” I said, ”has fallen into a pit, and you want--”

This was evidently not exactly the text he wanted. He seemed astonished when I quoted it.

”a.s.s!” he said. ”What a.s.s?”

”The Government,” I said. ”It is in rather a hole, isn't it?”

”Capital,” said c.l.i.thering, laughing without the smallest appearance of mirth, ”capital! I didn't catch the point for a moment, but I do now. My a.s.s has fallen into a pit. You put the matter in a nutsh.e.l.l, Lord Kilmore. I don't mind confessing that a pit of rather an inconvenient size does lie in front of us. I feel sure that you, as a humane man, won't refuse your help in the charitable work of helping to get us out.”

Marion came downstairs in her best hat. It was not for nothing that Bob Power and I and the running volunteer had struggled with her trunk. Her frock, also, was charming.

”Your daughter,” said c.l.i.thering. ”Now my dear young lady, you must spare your father to me for an hour. Affairs of state. Affairs of state. But you'll allow me to send you to church in my car. My private secretary is in it, and I shall tell him to see you safely to church, to secure a seat for you--”

”The Dean has reserved seats for us,” I said.

”Capital, capital. We can regard that as settled then. My private secretary--an excellent young fellow whom I picked up at Toynbee Hall--a student of our social problems--a man whom I'm sure you'll like.”

He conducted Marion to the door and handed her over to the private secretary from Toynbee Hall. I resigned myself and led c.l.i.thering to a deserted smoking-room.

”I never saw so much church-going anywhere,” he said. ”It's most remarkable. I don't think the Government quite appreciates--”

As a matter of fact the percentage of church-going men on that particular Sunday was considerably over the average. On the other hand there were much fewer women than usual. Every church of every Protestant denomination was holding a ”Parade Service” for volunteers, and most of the women who tried to get in had to be turned away from the doors. I thought it well to rub the facts in a little.

”Rack-renting landlords,” I said. ”Sweating capitalists, and clergymen whose churches are empty because their congregations are tired of hearing them curse the Pope!”

”Eh?” said c.l.i.thering, ”what's that? what's that?”

”Only a quotation,” I said. ”I forget if it was a Cabinet Minister--”

”Not at all,” said c.l.i.thering. ”I recollect the words now. It was one of the Irish Members. No Cabinet Minister would dream of saying such things. We have a high sense of the importance of the Ulster problem.

Nothing, I a.s.sure you, is further from our minds than the desire to minimize or treat with undue flippancy the conscientious objections, even the somewhat unreasonable fears of men whom we recognize as--”

c.l.i.thering paused. I had not anything particular to say, so I waited for him to begin again.

”I understand,” he said, ”that a meeting of the Unionist Defence Committee is to be held this afternoon.”

”Yes,” I said. ”I'm going to it. I'm not really a member of the committee, at least I wasn't until yesterday; but--”

”I quite understand, quite understand. In fact--speaking now in the strictest confidence--I may say that the suggestion to add your name to the committee was made--well it was made to Lady Moyne by a very important person. It was generally recognized that a man of your well-known moderation--”

I was beginning to dislike being called a man of moderation nearly as much as I disliked being called a Liberal.

”What do you want me to do?” I asked.

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