Part 102 (1/2)
Jasper changed the topic of conversation, and presently Whelpdale was able to talk with more calmness. The young man, since his a.s.sociation with Fleet & Co., had become fertile in suggestions of literary enterprise, and at present he was occupied with a project of special hopefulness.
'I want to find a capitalist,' he said, 'who will get possession of that paper Chat, and transform it according to an idea I have in my head. The thing is doing very indifferently, but I am convinced it might be made splendid property, with a few changes in the way of conducting it.'
'The paper is rubbish,' remarked Jasper, 'and the kind of rubbish--oddly enough--which doesn't attract people.'
'Precisely, but the rubbish is capable of being made a very valuable article, if it were only handled properly. I have talked to the people about it again and again, but I can't get them to believe what I say.
Now just listen to my notion. In the first place, I should slightly alter the name; only slightly, but that little alteration would in itself have an enormous effect. Instead of Chat I should call it Chit-Chat!'
Jasper exploded with mirth.
'That's brilliant!' he cried. 'A stroke of genius!'
'Are you serious? Or are you making fun of me? I believe it is a stroke of genius. Chat doesn't attract anyone, but Chit-Chat would sell like hot cakes, as they say in America. I know I am right; laugh as you will.'
'On the same principle,' cried Jasper, 'if The Tatler were changed to t.i.ttle-Tattle, its circulation would be trebled.'
Whelpdale smote his knee in delight.
'An admirable idea! Many a true word uttered in joke, and this is an instance! t.i.ttle-Tattle--a magnificent t.i.tle; the very thing to catch the mult.i.tude.'
Dora was joining in the merriment, and for a minute or two nothing but bursts of laughter could be heard.
'Now do let me go on,' implored the man of projects, when the noise subsided. 'That's only one change, though a most important one. What I next propose is this:--I know you will laugh again, but I will demonstrate to you that I am right. No article in the paper is to measure more than two inches in length, and every inch must be broken into at least two paragraphs.'
'Superb!'
'But you are joking, Mr Whelpdale!' exclaimed Dora.
'No, I am perfectly serious. Let me explain my principle. I would have the paper address itself to the quarter-educated; that is to say, the great new generation that is being turned out by the Board schools, the young men and women who can just read, but are incapable of sustained attention. People of this kind want something to occupy them in trains and on 'buses and trams. As a rule they care for no newspapers except the Sunday ones; what they want is the lightest and frothiest of chit-chatty information--bits of stories, bits of description, bits of scandal, bits of jokes, bits of statistics, bits of foolery. Am I not right? Everything must be very short, two inches at the utmost; their attention can't sustain itself beyond two inches. Even chat is too solid for them: they want chit-chat.'
Jasper had begun to listen seriously.
'There's something in this, Whelpdale,' he remarked.
'Ha! I have caught you?' cried the other delightedly. 'Of course there's something in it?'
'But--' began Dora, and checked herself.
'You were going to say--' Whelpdale bent towards her with deference.
'Surely these poor, silly people oughtn't to be encouraged in their weakness.'
Whelpdale's countenance fell. He looked ashamed of himself. But Jasper came speedily to the rescue.
'That's twaddle, Dora. Fools will be fools to the world's end. Answer a fool according to his folly; supply a simpleton with the reading he craves, if it will put money in your pocket. You have discouraged poor Whelpdale in one of the most notable projects of modern times.'
'I shall think no more of it,' said Whelpdale, gravely. 'You are right, Miss Dora.'
Again Jasper burst into merriment. His sister reddened, and looked uncomfortable. She began to speak timidly:
'You said this was for reading in trains and 'buses?'