Part 84 (1/2)
But the force of the habit abated a little. Now and then it seemed to return as strong as ever, but the fit went off again. His sufferings plainly decreased.
The doctor, having little yet of a practice, was able to be with him several hours every day, so that Donal could lie down. As he grew better, Davie, or mistress Brookes, or lady Arctura would sit with him.
But Donal was never farther off than the next room. The earl's madness was the worst of any, a moral madness: it could not fail to affect the brain, but had not yet put him beyond his own control. Repeatedly had Donal been on the verge of using force to restrain him, but had not yet found himself absolutely compelled to do so: fearless of him, he postponed it always to the very last, and the last had not yet arrived.
The gentle ministrations of his niece by and by seemed to touch him. He was growing to love her a little, He would smile when she came into the room, and ask her how she did. Once he sat looking at her for some time--then said,
”I hope I did not hurt you much.”
”When?” she asked.
”Then,” he answered.
”Oh, no; you did not hurt me--much!”
”Another time, I was very cruel to your aunt: do you think she will forgive me!”
”Yes, I do.”
”Then you have forgiven me?”
”Of course I have.”
”Then of course G.o.d will forgive me too!”
”He will--if you leave off, you know, uncle.”
”That's more than I can promise.”
”If you try, he will help you.”
”How can he? It is a second nature now!”
”He is your first nature. He can help you too by taking away the body and its nature together.”
”You're a fine comforter! G.o.d will help me to be good by taking away my life! A nice encouragement to try! Hadn't I better kill myself and save him the trouble!”
”It's not the dying, uncle! no amount of dying would ever make one good. It might only make it less difficult to be good.”
”But I might after all refuse to be good! I feel sure I should! He had better let me alone!”
”G.o.d can do more than that to compel us to be good--a great deal more than that! Indeed, uncle, we must repent.”
He said no more for some minutes; then suddenly spoke again.
”I suppose you mean to marry that rascal of a tutor!” he said.
She started up, and called Donal. But to her relief he did not answer: he was fast asleep.
”He would not thank you for the suggestion, I fear,” she said, sitting down again. ”He is far above me!”