Part 39 (1/2)

'And you've given me music, all my life there's been music. Oh Mama, you've given me kisses. And colourful scarves. And shown me how to use the tongue in my head, even if I've driven you crazy with it. Yes, you did,' she insisted. 'You taught me to think for myself and, best of all, you let me make my own mistakes.'

A cloud pa.s.sed over the moon and the sliver of light died in the room.

Valentina still said nothing.

'Mama, now it's your turn. Tell me what I have done right.' There was the sound of a deep intake of breath from the other end of the room and a low moan. It took a whole minute before Valentina spoke.

'Just your being alive is right. It is everything.'

Her mother's words seemed to burn up the darkness and set fire to something inside Lydia's head. She shut her eyes.

'Now go to sleep, dochenka. dochenka. We have a big day tomorrow.' We have a big day tomorrow.'

But an hour later Valentina's voice came again whispering through the darkness. 'Be happy for me, darling.'

'Happiness is hard.'

'I know.'

Lydia pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes to scrub away the pictures of Chang, alone and sick, behind her eyelids. Happiness she could get by without. But she was determined to hold on to hope.

32.

Achingly beautiful.

That's how Theo thought Junchow looked this morning. It had snowed overnight and now the town dazzled. Its drab grey roofs had been transformed into sparkling white slopes with curling eaves like sledges, eager to slip and slide away. Even the solid British mansions were no more than fragile icing. The light from the sky was a strange muted pink that made everything glitter, including the school courtyard below, where the perfect imprint of the paw marks of a night creature trailed through the snow from one end to the other.

'You go now, Tiyo, or you be late.'

Reluctantly he abandoned the window. Li Mei was standing behind him in a virginal white gown. A snowflake. He took her in his arms and kissed her soft lips but released her when he saw liquid trickle down her cheek. She was melting. He took the top hat she was holding in her hands. It was seal grey and appeared ridiculous to him. He was wearing a morning coat with absurd tails and a stiff white collar. Li Mei touched his cheek, smelled the flower in his lapel, and straightened the hat on his head.

'You look very fine, Tiyo, my love.'

'A very fine idiot,' he laughed.

She laughed with him.

'Come with me,' he said.

'No, my love.'

'Why?'

'It would not be fitting.'

'b.u.g.g.e.r fitting.'

'No, I do other things today.'

'What things?'

'I go speak with my father.'

'With Feng Tu Hong? d.a.m.n that devil. You swore you wished never to see him again.'

She lowered her head, her black hair swaying in a rippling curtain between them. 'I know. I break my oath. I pray the G.o.ds will forgive me.'

'Don't go to him, sweet one. Please. He might hurt you and I couldn't bear that.'

'Or I might hurt him,' she said, lifting her almond-shaped eyes to his. Achingly beautiful.

Theo tried to concentrate. The wedding service was thankfully short. That was the advantage of a civil ceremony over one of those elaborately drawn-out church weddings, full of fluff and flummery that Theo loathed. This was better. Brief and to the point. Shame for Alfred though. He was quite put out by not being allowed to exchange vows in a church before G.o.d, but if he insisted on marrying a woman who had been married before, what did he expect? The Church of England was a bit of a stickler about these niceties.

The bride was sparkling. That was Theo's problem. He was sitting in the front row of seats behind the groom, only dimly aware of the other guests around him, of hats and perfumes and neatly tied cravats. It was the bride's cream bolero that was bothering him. It was covered with tiny seed pearls that s.h.i.+mmered and s.h.i.+fted each time she breathed, seizing the light and swirling it around Theo's head, making it difficult for him to think clearly. He focused on the back of her dress instead, on her slender hips under the ivory-coloured chiffon, on the soft curves and the sweet rise of her b.u.t.tocks. Abruptly he wished he were at home with Li Mei. In the bath. His tongue trailing up her b.u.t.tery thigh.

He shook his head. Blinked hard. Emptied his brain of such thoughts. These days it was impossible to know where his mind would wander off next, and that worried him. He removed his grey gloves and chafed his hands together, oblivious to the noise, but a woman behind him tapped his shoulder pointedly, so he ceased. There were no more than about thirty people present, mainly colleagues of Alfred's from the Daily Herald Daily Herald, and Theo recognised one or two chaps from the club as well, but there was a large-bosomed elderly woman in taffeta, very Russian, whom he didn't know and a bright but stringy couple with clouds of white hair who smiled a lot. Vaguely he recalled Alfred mentioning that they were retired missionaries who'd lived in the same house as Valentina.

'Do you, Alfred Frederick Parker, take this woman . . . ?'

No, they'd got it all wrong. It was this woman who was taking Alfred. It was obvious to everyone but the poor blighter himself. This woman and her daughter. Theo brushed a hand over his burning eyes. Where was the daughter?

He recalled noticing her earlier when she walked into the chamber behind her mother, very upright and remote. She knew how to walk, that girl. Like she was queen of the jungle in her leaf-green dress and pelt of s.h.i.+ning copper hair. He glanced across the aisle and found her. She was staring stiffly down at the pale green gloves on her lap and picking at their fingers with sharp little tugs. Her hair was draped forward but did not quite hide a long scratch beside her ear. She had clearly been in a fight in that jungle of hers.

Theo leaned back in his seat and risked closing his eyes. Instantly he was swept away in a world of sampans and swaying decks and yellow teeth. As clear as day he could see Christopher Mason adrift on a raft in the wide mouth of the river, covered in snakes devouring his eyes and crawling into his ears.

Theo smiled and started to snore. 'What do you think, Theo, old chap? Pretty d.a.m.n decent I'd say, wouldn't you?'

'Yes, it's a fine house you've rented, Alfred.' It was at the eastern end of the British Quarter near St Sebastian's Church, tucked away in a leafy avenue. 'You and your beautiful bride should be very happy here.' He didn't mention the daughter.

'I think so too.'

They were standing on the terrace looking out over the extensive garden that even in the bleak grip of winter managed to look well cared for. Smoke from their cigars spiralled up into the still air and the brandy snifters were almost empty. Theo was desperate to leave. His eyes ached and his skin p.r.i.c.kled painfully. It felt as if a rodent were wriggling around under it, gnawing at the nerve ends. Behind him in the drawing room the buzz of voices enjoying themselves rose steadily as the wedding party made the most of the food and drink. Music drifted out, something by Paul Whiteman's band. The sound of it sc.r.a.ped like razor blades in his ears.

'Off soon?' he asked.

'Anytime now.' Alfred checked his pocket watch. 'The taxi is coming to take us to the station at three-thirty. Then it's a whole week at Datong. Just the two of us. On honeymoon. Valentina and me.' His smile was so broad, Theo thought it would split his face in half.

'You'll love the Huayuan temple.'

'I'm really looking forward to seeing it. Valentina too.'