Part 17 (1/2)
”Yes. And then. . .”
”Hold on. Why 'monkey circus'?”
”I don't know. Perhaps he heard that astronauts are spun in centrifuges. I don't know because I wasn't talking to him by that time. . . So, that was that. They let me go, only from now on the Luna Adapt will have to do a better job on its new arrivals.”
”There are others returning?”
”Yes. Simonadi's group, in eighteen years.”
”Then we have time.”
”Plenty.”
”You have to admit that they are easygoing,” I said. ”You break his collarbone and they let you off like that. . .”
”I have the impression it was because of that 'circus,' ” he said. ”Even they are. . . toward us. . . you know. And they're not stupid. It would have caused a scandal. Hal, man -- you don't know anything.”
”Well?”
”Do you know the reason they didn't publicize our return?”
”There was something in the real. I didn't see it, but someone told me.”
”Yes, there was. You would have died laughing if you had seen it. 'Yesterday, in the morning hours, a party of explorers returned to Earth from outer s.p.a.ce. Its members are well. The scientific results of the expedition are now being studied.' The end, period.”
”Are you serious?”
”Word of honor. And do you know why they did that? Because they fear us. That is also why they scattered us over the Earth.”
”No. I don't understand that. They're not stupid. You said so yourself a moment ago. Surely they don't think that we are predators, that we will throw ourselves at people's throats!”
”If they thought that, they wouldn't have let us come. No, Hal. This doesn't have to do with us. More is at stake. Can't you see it?”
”Apparently I've grown stupid. Tell me.”
”The public is not aware. . .”
”Of what?”
”Of the fact that the spirit of exploration is dead. That there are no expeditions, they know. But they don't think about it. They think that there are no expeditions because expeditions are unnecessary, and that's all. But there are some who see and know perfectly well what is going on, and what consequences it will have. Has already had.”
”Well?”
”Pap. Pap and more pap for all eternity. No one will fly to the stars now. No one will risk a dangerous experiment now. No one will test a new medicine on himself now. What, they don't know this? They know! And if the word got out who we are, what we did, why we flew, what it was all about, then it would be impossible, you see, impossible to conceal the tragedy!”
”Pap and more pap?” I asked, using his expression; someone listening to our conversation might have found this funny, but I was in no mood to laugh.
”Of course. And you don't think it's a tragedy?”
”I don't know. Olaf, listen. For us that must be and will always be a great thing. The way we gave up those years -- and everything -- well, we believe this to be of the utmost importance. But perhaps it isn't. One has to be objective. Because -- tell me yourself -- what did we accomplish?”
”What do you mean?”
”Well, unpack the bags. Dump out everything you brought back from Fomalhaut.”
”Are you crazy?”
”Not at all. What was the value of this expedition?”
”We were pilots, Hal. Ask Gimma, Thurber.”
”Olaf, don't give me that. We were there together, and you know perfectly well what they did, what Venturi did before he died, what Thurber did -- why are you looking at me like that? What did we bring back? Four loads of various a.n.a.lyses, spectral, elemental, et-ceteral, mineral samples, and then there is that soup or metaplasm or whatever that rotten stuff from Beta Arcturi was called. Normers verified his theory of gravimagnetic rotations, and it turned out, in addition, that on planets of type C Meoli there can exist not tri- but tetraploids of silicon, and on that moon where Arder nearly did himself in there is nothing but lousy lava and bubbles the size of skysc.r.a.pers. And was it in order to learn that that lava hardens into those G.o.dd.a.m.n big bubbles that we vomited ten years out of our lives and came back here to be side-show freaks? Then why in h.e.l.l did we go there? For what? Maybe you can tell me. For what?”
”Not so loud,” he said.
I was angry. And he was angry. His eyes had narrowed. I thought that we might fight yet, and my lips began to twitch into a grin. And then suddenly he, too, smiled.
”Still a hothead,” he said. ”You can drive a man into a fury, you know that?”
”Get to the point, Olaf. To the point.”
”To the point? You haven't got to the point yet. And what if we had brought back an elephant that had eight legs and talked algebra, what then, would that have made you happy? What were you expecting on Arcturus? Paradise? A triumphal arch? What do you want? In ten years I didn't hear so much nonsense from you as now, in one minute.”
I took a deep breath.
”Olaf, you are trying to make a fool of me. You know what I meant. I meant that people can live without it. . .”
”I should think they can! Indeed, yes!”
”Wait. They can live, and even if it is as you say, that they have stopped flying because of betrization, still, was it worth it, was it right to pay such a price -- that is the question before us, my friend.”
”Is it? And suppose you marry. Why do you make a face? You can't get married? You can. I'm telling you, you can. And you will have children. And you will carry them to be betrizated with a song on your lips. Well?”
”Not with a song. But what could I do? I can't war against the whole world.. . .”
”Well, then, the blessing of the firmament upon you,” he said. ”And now, if you like, we can go to the city.”
”Fine,” I said. ”Lunch will be in two and a half hours. We can make it.”
”And if we don't make it, they won't give us anything to eat?”
”They will, but. . .”
I turned red. Pretending not to notice, he brushed the sand off his bare feet. We went upstairs, changed, and took the car to Clavestra. The traffic on the road was heavy. For the first time I saw colored gleeders, pink and pastel-lemon. We found a service station. I fancied I saw surprise in the gla.s.s eyes of the robot that examined the damage. We left the car there and returned on foot. It turned out that there were two Clavestras, an old and a new; in the old city was the local industrial center, where I had been the previous day with Marger. The new part was a fas.h.i.+onable summer resort, and there were people everywhere, almost exclusively young, teen-agers. In their gaudy, glittering outfits the boys looked dressed up as Roman soldiers, since the materials caught the sun like the half armor of that period. A lot of girls, most of them attractive, often in bathing suits more daring than anything I had seen so far. Walking with Olaf, I felt the eyes of the whole street on me. Colorful groups stopped under the palms at the sight of us. We were taller than anyone there, people stood and exchanged looks, it was extremely embarra.s.sing.
When at last we got to the highway and turned south across the fields, in the direction of the house, Olaf wiped his forehead with a handkerchief. I was sweating a little, too.