Part 21 (1/2)
”At the moment, all I'm wearing is my Polo cologne. I'm getting a head start on the nude camping thing.”
”Practice makes perfect,” I agreed. ”Are you lying down on your new couch?”
”I'm in my new bed, actually.”
”And what are you doing in your new bed?”
”I was looking at p.o.r.n, feeling myself up.”
”Good boy! I take it the horse is out of the barn.”
”He sure is. And he's a big big horse.” horse.”
”If you stroke his neck very gently, he'll calm down.”
”I don't want him to calm down.”
”What are you thinking about as you stroke him?”
”You, of course.”
”What about me?”
”I'm thinking about your a.s.s right now. It was so smooth and soft. It was like a baby's bottom. I wish I could kiss it right now.”
”Really?”
”Of course. I'd kiss it and lick it a bit; then I'd spread your cheeks and put the horse in the barn.”
”He likes being in the barn.”
”He does indeed!”
”And you like older men, huh?”
”They've already been broken in. They don't cry as much when you pop their cherry.”
”You've got a filthy mind, don't you?”
”You started it.”
”If you need to put the horse in the barn, you know where I am. Just bring more lube.”
”The cheese-eater goes to bed at nine?”
”Like clockwork.”
”I'll be there with a very large tube of lube and a very large and eager c.o.c.k.”
”You're going to bale my hay?”
”Is the pope Catholic?”
32) You'll be late
NOAH WOKE WOKE me. He looked at Jackson and grinned from ear to ear as he tapped his wrist. me. He looked at Jackson and grinned from ear to ear as he tapped his wrist.
”s.h.i.+t,” I said.
You'll be late, he said. he said.
You're not kidding, I thought.
Noah grabbed my bath towel from where it hung on the back of my closet door and handed it me.
I made coffee, he said. he said.
Let me wake up, I said.
I couldn't afford to be late again, not with Mr. Owen ragging my a.s.s.
I sat, pulled the sheet over to cover my nakedness, and smiled sheepishly.
Noah didn't seem to notice or care.
Me and K. are going to the B-u-f-f-a-l-o P-a-r-k today with Mrs. H. Can I have some money for a soda?
Of course. No soda. Juice. That's the rule.
Please can I have a soda?
You know the rule.
Please, daddy? If you let me have a soda, I won't tell Memaw about him.
He threw a significant glance at Jackson Ledbetter.
You little t.u.r.d!
Please?
Okay. Only one!
Thanks! K. said she wants to be my girlfriend.