Part 1 (2/2)

I looked over the bal.u.s.trade and down into the lower portion of the dining room. A chandelier hung over the white table cloths and glimmered like a promise. I made a New Year's resolution right then and there not to get involved with anyone else until I was fully comfortable with myself and the choices I'd made. Your life is not a mistake, just an experience.

Why is it that when you finally find your feet, life always finds a way to knock you back down again?

Stuart and I didn't leave the restaurant until well after midnight.

Despite our rough start, things were actually going fairly well. We'd shared dating horror stories like the best of girlfriends and after I'd gotten a couple of gla.s.ses of wine down, we'd actually started to flirt. I'd spent half the night with Stuart's warm hand caressing my thigh. Previous declarations aside, he was a handsome man and I was lonely. I told myself that there was absolutely nothing wrong with my asking him to come home with me. In all honesty, he'd given me the best holiday I'd had in years. I wasn't alone and I wasn't thinking about the past. On their own, either of those things was enough to make my day. Combined, they practically made my year.

”Hey Stuart,” I asked as we walked across the parking lot to his car. ”Do you want to come over for a little while?” Stuart paused and looked down at me. His eyes caught on the line of golden cleavage above my red dress for just a moment before he met my gaze. ”Just for tonight,” I added, hoping I wasn't giving him the wrong impression. I'd had fun, but I was no way ready to jump into another relations.h.i.+p. I wasn't sure when or even if that would ever happen again. ”No strings attached.” I let my fingers touch the crisp fabric of his s.h.i.+rt and when he didn't protest, I let my hand slide under the edges of his khaki suit jacket. Stuart didn't say a thing, just let his own fingers slide up the side of my neck and tangle in the dark waves of my hair. He removed my clip and watched hungrily as ebony cascades tumbled down around my shoulders.

”I'd love to,” he told me as he ran his tongue across his lips and his blue eyes twinkled softly. Leaning down just a bit, he pressed a sensual kiss to my mouth. There weren't any fireworks or explosions of light and sound, but then, there never are, right? But the kiss was enough to get my body warm and my thighs moist. ”Shall we?” he asked as he unlocked the car with his key fob and started around towards the driver's side. I had just the briefest of moments to think, 'He's still not going to open the door for me?' when Stuart looked up and his eyes widened in alarm. An arm went around my waist and tugged me against a firm chest. I smelt cologne and a spicy aftershave that had once made me swoon, but now were just reminders of good times gone wrong.

”Theresa, baby, why are you doing this to me?” I pulled away from the intruder and spun around to find Gary behind me, eyes red rimmed and mouth tight. He barely looked like himself. Even angry, Gary had always been able to hold onto some semblance of pride and at least the appearance of self-control. Now he looked disheveled and anxious. His hands were shaking and he was running his left hand through his hair, again and again and again.

”What are you doing here?” I asked without turning around to look at Stuart. I could only focus on Gary right now. He looked dangerous. The last time he had looked this way, I had feared for my life and I had left him. I was not going through this again. At least this time, there was a man at my back and a parking lot still partially full of people. He couldn't hurt me here even if he wanted to.

”I tried to be nice about it,” he told me as he turned away and rubbed his hand down his face. ”I called you several times, left several messages. I even met you at the store like you wanted and you didn't hear me.” I shook my head.

”What are you talking about?” I asked, thoroughly confused.

”G.o.dd.a.m.n it,” Gary said and he looked down at the pavement, eyes closed like he was trying to come to terms with something. ”Our date, Theresa. Where do we always go for special occasions? You stood me up.” I just stared at him and he whirled to face me. ”The Vertigo. I was at The Vertigo.” I looked up as Stuart came around the front of the car and closed the pa.s.senger side door. I didn't even get the chance to ask what he was doing. I was more concerned with Gary.

”We went there once,” I said, still not quite understanding what was happening. It's hard to realize you've made a mistake, married the wrong person. It's even harder to accept that they could be dangerous. That they could take that emotional pain and take it another step further. ”We went there one time to celebrate our engagement, Gary.” An engine roared behind me and I turned around just in time to see Stuart pulling out of the parking s.p.a.ce. His tires were barely six inches away from the toes of my high heels. ”What the h.e.l.l?” Gary grabbed my shoulder and spun me around, pus.h.i.+ng me back until I was slamming against the side of a white van emblazoned with the name of the restaurant. He pointed at my face, hands shaking, jaw tight. This was the anger that I had seen before, that I had fled. I looked around for help.

”You stood me up and you came out with another man,” he said through gritted teeth. n.o.body was coming this way. It was like we were hidden in plain sight, caught in the shadows behind the van and blocked from view by the bright lights that lit up the majority of the parking lot. I thought about screaming for help, but I didn't want to make a scene. Why didn't I bring the gun? I wondered as Gary released my shoulder. ”You're a cheating, lying wh.o.r.e,” he told me as I started to move away. Gary punched the side of the van and finally caught the attention of a couple near the restaurant's entrance. They didn't come over to us, but they were looking. ”But I forgive you,” he said, changing tactics suddenly. He reached up and took my face between his hands. ”I forgive you, Theresa,” he told me. ”I love you.”

”Gary,” I said as calmly and as firmly as I was able. This had to stop now. I was not going to play his games. ”We are no longer together, remember?” He was already shaking his head and turning away. ”You need help, Gary,” I told him. I didn't say all that I was thinking. I didn't tell him that I thought he was a complete f.u.c.king psycho that deserved to be locked up. Maybe later, over the safety of an e-mail or a text, but not now. Not with him three feet in front of me pacing like a caged animal. Gary's personality had always been ... malleable. I'd seen him go from laughing to crying to stoic. But nothing like this, not even during the two fights that had made up my mind about him.

”I don't need help,” he said, almost pleaded. ”I just need you. My life isn't complete without you.” He turned away and put his hands on his hips, took several, big breaths of the cool night air. I started to move away, sidling down the side of the van. ”Until death do us part, Theresa,” he said calmly and when he turned to face me, his brown eyes were like black pits, swallowed by shadows and anger. ”You made a promise to me.”

I turned around and started to run.

CHAPTER 3.

”I'm so sorry about your date,” Jamie said as she stood in my kitchen and unpacked a bottle of wine, a package of brie and a loaf of French bread. It was our favorite get together snack, one that I knew I wouldn't enjoy. Not today. Last night had left me feeling shaken and defeated. I hadn't told Jamie the whole truth yet, wasn't sure if I wanted to. If I did, she'd blow it all out of proportion. Gary was sick. Maybe he was bipolar, maybe schizophrenic, I wasn't sure. I just needed to watch my back and carry my gun in my purse. That was it. Period. It was over. I was changing my phone number tomorrow and my e-mail address. I decided to glaze over the events that happened after Stuart had left. ”So he just ditched you in the parking lot?”

”Yeah,” I said with a heavy sigh. ”Gary just showed up and popped over to say hi and then Stuart was gone. He practically ran over my foot.” She sliced me a piece of bread and I grabbed it, using it to gesture at her like it was a pointer. ”Don't ever set me up again. Your date choices are horrible.” Jamie sighed and poured us both a ma.s.sive goblet of wine. They were huge, medieval looking even. I picked mine up and downed half. I had a right to.

”I wish Joel had a brother,” she said as she leaned her hip against the blue tiles of my countertop. ”Then you'd marry him and we'd be sisters legally and not just spiritually.” I rolled my eyes and scooped a ma.s.sive lump of brie onto my bread. I didn't even spread it around, just ate it as is.

”That would never happen,” I said as I tried my best to smile. ”Because then I'd be obligated to go to those terrible MacMillan get-togethers.” Jamie rolled her eyes and spilled a ma.s.sive amount of alcohol on her white blouse.

”You have no idea,” she said as we both laughed. ”There were fifteen underage kids at my house yesterday and at least three balding, middle aged babies.” I chuckled. ”The new sofa is just trashed and there's still a million plastic cups and paper plates scattered over the backyard.” She took a bite of bread and kept talking while she chewed. ”That's not my job, just so you know. That's Joel's.” Jamie paused as the doorbell rang and raised her eyebrows at me. ”Expecting someone?” she asked. I shook my head and moved across the kitchen and through the living room, pausing at the peephole to look out. It's not like I expected anything bad to happen, just that after what had happened last night, I wasn't taking any chances.

Standing outside on the porch was my daughter, Rhea.

With a squeal, I flung open the door and she threw herself in my arms. I saw Glen sitting in his car at the curb and gave him a little wave. He honked once, waved back, and was gone. That was the extent of our interactions nowadays. Deliver Rhea, confirm delivery, checkout.

”What are you doing back so early?” I asked as I held her by the shoulders and looked her over. ”Did Winnie have another mommy temper tantrum?” Rhea giggled and shook her head, her straight, black hair flying around her small face.

”Angie fell off a rock at the beach and broke her leg.” I raised my eyebrows. Angie was Rhea's younger sister, Glen's biological daughter, only six years old. ”She got a cast and we all signed it.” Rhea leaned in conspiratorially. ”I even drew a p.e.n.i.s on it with Sharpie.” I heard Jamie snort behind me and tried not to break out into a maniacal grin. G.o.d, I love this kid. ”Winnie made us cover it with stickers, but she bought the wrong kind and Angie had a huge screaming tantrum in the airport. It was really fun.” I picked up her bag as she skipped into the house and went straight for her bedroom.

”I'm glad you had a good time,” I said as she disappeared around the corner into the hallway.

”I'll be right back!” she shouted as I tossed the black and yellow duffel bag onto the couch. Jamie grinned at me as I reentered the kitchen and leaned against the counter.

”What?” I asked as she shook her head.

”You two are too, too much,” she said as she set her wine gla.s.s on the counter.

”Hey,” I said as I gestured at the stack of books on the edge of the dining room table. ”I am not the one that said it was time for 'The Talk.' That was you. You're the one that gave her the d.a.m.n books and you're the one that's to blame for the subsequent drawing of p.e.n.i.ses, so just get over yourself, okay?”

”Uh-huh,” Jamie said, straightening her black A-line skirt and picking at her panty hose. ”Do you have any sweats? I need to get out of this d.a.m.n monkey suit.”

”Of course I do,” I said with a sigh as Jamie started to follow me down the hallway. ”I have a whole drawer full of clothes just for you. Why don't you pack a bag when you know you're staying the night?”

”Mom.” I paused just outside my bedroom door and looked down the hallway towards the pale blue walls of Rhea's room.

”Yeah?”

”Come here for a second.” Something about her voice made me want to run. It sounded ... forced. Rhea never sounded like that. She was always easy, calm, relaxed. I moved down the hallway briskly and paused in the doorway, fearing the worst. I was having Fatal Attraction flashbacks. Granted, we didn't own any pets so finding a dead animal in my daughter's room was a long shot, but Gary had freaked me out. I had a feeling it would be awhile before I was completely over last night.

”Where's the fire?” Jamie asked as she trailed behind me.

I turned the corner and nearly had a heart attack when Rhea screamed out, ”Surprise!” In her small hands was a necklace made out of what looked to be small, black beads. She'd tied a ribbon around it and even attached a small card. ”I was hiding it in my pocket and you didn't even see,” she said proudly as I took the gift in my own hands and examined it. There were little red and pink hearts painted on each bead. ”It's a Kukui nut necklace,” she stated authoritatively. ”And it has magic, too. It will bring you love.” She paused and giggled. ”And p.e.n.i.ses.”

”Rhea!” I said, trying my best not to laugh. I put a hand on my hip and couldn't hold back a smile.

”Hey,” Jamie said, leaning against the door frame behind me. ”Can't complain about that. I say, amen. Nice job, Rhea.” Rhea grinned and gestured at me wildly, feisty and colorful in her bright pink s.h.i.+rt and yellow spandex pants. What can I say, the girl had style.

”Put it on,” she whispered excitedly. I detached the card, smiled at the hastily scrawled 'I love you' and slipped off the eye of Horus necklace. I put the new necklace on in its place and did a ridiculous and completely embarra.s.sing, wine inspired runway show.

I had just traded a symbol of protection for a symbol of love.

<script>