Part 20 (1/2)
”Gloria,” he whispered very softly. Again she had made a magic, subtle and pervading as a spilt perfume, irresistible and sweet.
Afterward, neither the next day nor after many years, could he remember the important things of that afternoon. Had she been moved? In his arms had she spoken a little--or at all? What measure of enjoyment had she taken in his kisses? And had she at any time lost herself ever so little?
Oh, for him there was no doubt. He had risen and paced the floor in sheer ecstasy. That such a girl should be; should poise curled in a corner of the couch like a swallow newly landed from a clean swift flight, watching him with inscrutable eyes. He would stop his pacing and, half shy each time at first, drop his arm around her and find her kiss.
She was fascinating, he told her. He had never met any one like her before. He besought her jauntily but earnestly to send him away; he didn't want to fall in love. He wasn't coming to see her any more--already she had haunted too many of his ways.
What delicious romance! His true reaction was neither fear nor sorrow--only this deep delight in being with her that colored the ba.n.a.lity of his words and made the mawkish seem sad and the posturing seem wise. He _would_ come back--eternally. He should have known!
”This is all. It's been very rare to have known you, very strange and wonderful. But this wouldn't do--and wouldn't last.” As he spoke there was in his heart that tremulousness that we take for sincerity in ourselves.
Afterward he remembered one reply of hers to something he had asked her.
He remembered it in this form--perhaps he had unconsciously arranged and polished it:
”A woman should be able to kiss a man beautifully and romantically without any desire to be either his wife or his mistress.”
As always when he was with her she seemed to grow gradually older until at the end ruminations too deep for words would be wintering in her eyes.
An hour pa.s.sed, and the fire leaped up in little ecstasies as though its fading life was sweet. It was five now, and the clock over the mantel became articulate in sound. Then as if a brutish sensibility in him was reminded by those thin, tinny beats that the petals were falling from the flowered afternoon, Anthony pulled her quickly to her feet and held her helpless, without breath, in a kiss that was neither a game nor a tribute.
Her arms fell to her side. In an instant she was free.
”Don't!” she said quietly. ”I don't want that.”
She sat down on the far side of the lounge and gazed straight before her. A frown had gathered between her eyes. Anthony sank down beside her and closed his hand over hers. It was lifeless and unresponsive.
”Why, Gloria!” He made a motion as if to put his arm about her but she drew away.
”I don't want that,” she repeated.
”I'm very sorry,” he said, a little impatiently. ”I--I didn't know you made such fine distinctions.”
She did not answer.
”Won't you kiss me, Gloria?”
”I don't want to.” It seemed to him she had not moved for hours.
”A sudden change, isn't it?” Annoyance was growing in his voice.
”Is it?” She appeared uninterested. It was almost as though she were looking at some one else.
”Perhaps I'd better go.”
No reply. He rose and regarded her angrily, uncertainly. Again he sat down.
”Gloria, Gloria, won't you kiss me?”
”No.” Her lips, parting for the word, had just faintly stirred.
Again he got to his feet, this time with less decision, less confidence.