Part 12 (1/2)

He rocked backward on his heels and crossed his own arms. His eyes narrowed. ”Fine. You want to know what I felt? I felt hatred, Alexis. Murderous hatred.”

I sucked in a breath, more at his icy tone than his words. Very slowly, I exhaled and tried to relax my shoulders. I already knew this; I'd seen the anger in his mind that night. ”Okay. Well, the Daemoni were there. Of course you did. Why is that such a big deal?”

He spun away from me, and his arms flew out with exasperation, one hand barely missing my jaw. He let out a groan and grabbed his hair in his fists. He turned back to me with a peculiar wildness in his eyes. I didn't understand the problem. Did he really think I'd judge him for hating our enemy? I mean, sure, Amadis weren't supposed to hate, but I really doubted he felt true hatred. He was beyond that. We both might feel intense anger and extreme dislike to the point that it could almost be hatred, especially during a fight, except ... he wasn't fighting ...

”Not toward them!” he roared. ”Toward you! I hated you.”

I involuntarily stepped backward, my b.u.t.t hitting the granite counter, and stared at him with eyes wide enough I thought they might burst from their sockets. My lungs felt as though all the air had been sucked out of them.

”Me? You ... hate ...” I stammered. Then I shook my head and even chuckled, though the sound came out more like a cat choking on a hairball. ”Of course not. It was the monster. The monster is back, Tristan. That's how you'd felt when we first met, remember?”

He put his hands low on his hips. ”It's not the same. It's not the same beast. It's worse.”

I reached out for his arm. He took a step away from me, as if afraid of my touch. ”Why do you keep saying it's worse? Because it's really you? You ... hate me?”

”No, Alexis! Of course not. But don't you get it? Something else made me feel hatred toward you. Made me see you with different eyes. Something external, and I couldn't control it. Not like the beast. That was inside of me-” he pounded his chest with a fist ”-where I could restrain it. This ... this was different. And extremely dangerous.”

My mind went over the scene in South Beach. ”But you did control it. You fought it. I could see it on your face.”

”I was resisting the urge to join in the fight-to attack you myself.”

”But you beat it.”

”And it was nearly impossible!” His voice had risen again. He caught himself and lowered it. ”They're using dark magic, Lex. Very strong dark magic that gave me this overwhelming desire to hurt you. To kill you.”

”Wait. They're not ... I mean ...” I stammered as I processed the meaning of his words. ”What you're saying ... they're controlling you?”

Hard hazel eyes glared at me for a long moment, before he said, ”Yes. They were that night.”

”No,” I whispered, shaking my head in denial. ”It ... They can't ...”

”They have.”

Some kind of maniacal laugh escaped my throat, but I really wanted to scream. To cry. To punch something.

”Why?” I asked, my voice shaking as I tried to fight the anger from overwhelming me. ”Why can't they leave you alone? Are we going to have to deal with this s.h.i.+t the rest of our lives?”

Now my voice had risen, approaching the scream I tried so hard to hold back. Tristan didn't answer me, but his expression said it all. Of course, they'd try everything possible to get their warrior back. Why did this even surprise me?

I inhaled a few deep, cleansing breaths, trying to calm myself. I pushed off the counter and paced the kitchen a few times.

”How exactly?” I finally demanded, sharper than I intended.

”We're talking dark magic. They have all kinds of weapons they could use, but my guess is a mage must have created some kind of connection to me. An extremely powerful mage to be able to wield this kind of dark magic.”

I stopped pacing and turned toward him.

”Kali?” I asked. She certainly had motivation. And if it was her, I had no problem following through for the faeries. They were right-I'd want to satisfy their request just as much for me and the Amadis as for them.

”Possibly, but she's not their only sorceress.”

”Well,” I said, squaring my shoulders, ”then we find out and go after them.”

He grimaced. ”And there you go again, acting before you think.”

I scowled. ”What does that mean?”

”You're reckless, Lex. You see someone who needs rescued, and you charge like a bull. Only by luck are we and anyone else you get involved even alive.”

I crossed my arms over my chest, feeling defensive. ”Not luck. Might. And power.” Remembering Ca.s.sandra's words, I added, ”And I do it for the greater good!”

He stepped over to stand in front of me, his eyes paralyzing me with their intensity as he placed his hands on my shoulders.

”Listen to me, just this once, Alexis. Do it for the greater good, because if you're dead, so are a h.e.l.l of a lot of people.” He waited for me to acknowledge my understanding, so I nodded. ”If we go out there, only the two of us, they can take control of me again. And now that they know how close I was to breaking, they'll be able to overcome me next time. And you know who my first target will be.”

I cleared my throat. ”Me.”

”Right. Eliminate my weakness. So you cannot be as reckless as you've been anymore. Understand?”

I pressed my lips together and nodded, knowing that would appease him. But somehow, I had to figure out a way to cut their connection with my husband. Again.

He pulled me into his arms, and I leaned my head against his chest, glad our fight was over and that he had told me the truth.

”It seemed as if they were waiting for us, didn't it?” I asked, relieved to finally be able to talk about that night. This had been bugging me for nearly two weeks. ”As if they knew we were coming?”

”They've likely been waiting for us for some time. They surely know by now that we need the pendant, and we'll come after it.”

”And Vanessa's totally been taunting us. She played hard to get in South Beach. Sonya said she'd been in Fort Myers Beach the night before we were there and might still have been. She toyed with us on the Greek island. But any other time, our people can't find a trace of her anywhere, as if she disappears from the face of the earth.”

Tristan hummed in agreement. ”She loves her games.”

”c.r.a.p, Tristan. That has been her game, hasn't it?” I pulled back enough to look up at him. ”Tease us with the pendant so we'll chase after it, while the mages are in the background figuring out how to connect with you. How are we ever going to get the pendant if we can't go near them?”

”We hope Owen decides to come back, or that Sophia finds you another protector.”

”I don't want another protector.” I frowned. ”I want Owen or you. Other than you two, who else can protect me better than myself?”

He narrowed his eyes, but a small smile played on his lips. ”That's the kind of thought a reckless and c.o.c.ky warrior would have, Lex.”

”Sorry, but it's true,” I said with a shrug. I leaned back against him. ”I still don't get why you kept this from me. Did you really think I'd believe you hated me?”

He pressed his lips to the top of my head. ”I couldn't control myself, ma lykita. You could have died, and I would have stood there like an idiot, maybe even helped. How am I supposed to live with that? How was I supposed to tell you that without losing your love and trust?”

I looked up at him and lifted my hand to his face. I brushed my fingers across his cheekbone. ”You should know me better by now. It will take a lot more than Daemoni magic to make me stop loving you.”