Part 2 (1/2)

COLONEL.

And has a man betrayed her?

SYLVESTER.

Never. Not likely to.

COLONEL.

That's what's the matter, perhaps?

SYLVESTER.

Her theory is, that boys ought to be girls, and young men should be maids. [_COLONEL throws down the book._] That's how she'd equalize the s.e.xes.

COLONEL.

Pshaw! [_Takes up another book._] ”Ye Foolish Virgins!--A Remonstrance--by Victoria Vivash.”

SYLVESTER.

Another soul! She's also for equality. Her theory is, that girls should be boys, and maids should be young men. Goes in for latchkeys and that sort of thing.

COLONEL [_throws down the book_].

Bah! [_Takes up a third._] ”Naked and Unashamed--A Few Plain Facts and Figures--by Mary Bevan, M.D.” Who on earth's she?

SYLVESTER.

One of the plain figures. _She_ comes to our house, too.

COLONEL [_reads_].

”The Physiology of the s.e.xes!” Oh, this eternal babble of the s.e.xes!

[_Throws book down._] Why can't a woman be content to be a woman? What does she want to make a beastly man of herself for?

SYLVESTER.

But my wife isn't a woman.

COLONEL.

None of them are, my boy. A woman, who _is_ a woman, doesn't want to be anything else. These people are a s.e.x of their own, Sylvester. They have invented a new gender. And to think my nephew's one of them!

[_Strides up and down, seizes another antimaca.s.sar and flings it into another corner._

SYLVESTER.

Oh, he's young. Don't despair!