Vol Chapter 1 (2/2)

My head was more dazed than before. I tried to lift my body again, but I couldn’t get the energy, and collapsed back on the bed.

While worrying about what to do, I fell back asleep.

“…A slight fever. Maybe it’s because of the changing season? I think it’ll be fine if you just rest.”

“…Sorry, Teacher.”

I wasn’t sure how much time had pa.s.sed, but Teacher shook me awake. After that, he brought me hot milk, and I took a sip. It was a little too hot.

“It’s not a particularly high fever, but since you can’t move, I’ll make some soup and bring it to you. Is there anything else you want?”, Teacher asked with a smile.

If I said I wanted to read a book, he’d probably be upset… But before I could even think about how to reply, there was already a word out of my mouth.

“…x.x.xX.”

It took me a few seconds to realize what I’d said. I looked to Teacher, and he looked at me like he’d been splashed with cold water.

Oh no. It just sounded like static to me, so I wasn’t thinking about it, but maybe that word had some strange meaning. I quickly lowered my head with embarra.s.sment.

“…Oh dear. That, I can’t give you. And it’s not something you can buy. …Sorry. I’ll keep it in mind.”

When I looked up, I saw Teacher smiling with a bit of sadness on his face. I had the same thought when I first met him, but he really had very childlike expressions.

“Well… Maybe I’ll just buy some new books again, then. I was planning to go shopping in town this afternoon.”

The words “new books” made my heart quiver a little. I had faint recollections of all the books in the library, and there were no others that suited my tastes. So having more books I could read made me very happy.

“You like to read, don’t you, Allen? I’m really impressed by how many difficult words you know already,” Teacher praised with admiration.

“…You read difficult books too, Teacher. There’s a lot of them in your room.”

“Ahaha… Well, Teacher’s not so smart. So I have to read that many just to understand anything.”

He lowered his head slightly with a lonesome look. Then he put a hand to his mouth, and fell silent.

“Teacher?”

He didn’t respond. I waved a hand in front of his eyes, but no change in the situation. …Deep in thought again, I supposed. It’d be a while until he came back to us.

Teacher would suddenly go quiet like this not only when he was alone, but even in the middle of conversations with us. He was up late every night researching things, but I always wondered what. He was a very kind person… but I really didn’t know anything more than that.

“Allen, if I told you there was a World unlike our world… Would you believe me?”

Teacher was again looking into my eyes.

“Huh? …What do you mean?”, I asked back, confused by the offbeat question. What did he mean by “World”?

“…No, it’s just a fairy tale. Sorry to bring it up,” he hurriedly replied.

“But… should you be invited to that door, I’d advise against opening it.”

With that, he checked my temperature again, then left the room. As Teacher closed the door, I thought I heard him say, “Just a little more.”

When I next woke up, I was feeling much better. Maybe it was thanks to Teacher’s frequent attending to me. I had the chicken soup and sandwich left on my desk and drank the cold remedy beside them. After that, I changed out of my pajamas.

As I opened the door to leave the room, I heard a small yelp and an impact on my body. A girl was lying on her bottom in front of me, her eyes dazed.

“Are you okay, Chelsy?”

I held out my hand, and her face burned up at once. But she timidly grabbed it and slowly got up.

“Th, thank you. Um, I-I’m sorry…”, Chelsy said with her face lowered in embarra.s.sment, her voice half-vanis.h.i.+ng. Even though we’d known each other a while now, she still kept her distance when we talked.

Wondering if maybe she was scared of my face, I tried smiling at Chelsy. That made her eyes bulge, and she twisted her neck in confusion. …Maybe I’d forgotten how to put on expressions properly.

“U-Umm. Teacher said you seemed to be doing much better, and it was okay to talk with you. And, uh, I was kind of anxious about…”

Her voice got quieter and increasingly more mumbly. I couldn’t really make out what she said toward the end, but it seemed like she’d been worried about me, at any rate.

“…Thanks. I’m fine now,” I said to Chelsy, looking her right in the eye. She hurried to do the same and nodded a tiny bit. Considering that she wouldn’t make eye contact at all at first, maybe we were gradually getting more friendly. …Still keeping a pretty big distance, though.

Just then, I heard a creaking of some kind from the ceiling. Chelsy shrieked a little, and I fell on my behind with surprise at her scream. She promptly reached out to grab my hand, but tripped and fell in the process.

“…What are you doing?”

The door of the room next to mine cracked open, and Rick stared at us through the gap dubiously. I explained the situation, and he wordlessly grabbed our hands and lifted Chelsy and I up.

“Letty told me I should stay away from Allen because he has a cold, but you look okay now to me,” Rick said, and stroked my head.

“Why were you startled by a sound, anyway? The floor here squeaks all the time… It should be a common occurrence.”

Rick put his weight on one leg, and the wood floor made a strained sound like it might crumble at any moment. Getting uneasy, I quickly told him “that’s enough” and grabbed his arm.

“Um… Joshua said something. He said there’s been voices, coming from the second floor lately. So… maybe… I thought it might be… a ghost, or…” Chelsy’s face rapidly paled.

“…Joshua tells lies like that all the time. You’re too honest, Chelsy. It’s not like you’ve seen it for yourself, so…”

Rick sighed and put a hand on Chelsy’s shoulder. Another one of Joshua’s tall tales, I thought - but this one had my interest.

“…What kind of voices, I wonder? Girls’ voices? Old guys’ voices?”

“What, you too, Allen?” Rick seemed appalled. “…If you’re honestly curious, ask Joshua. He should be in his room.”

Chelsy yawned, and the two of them said good night to me and returned to their rooms. I went to Joshua’s to ask him about the voices on the second floor.

“Huh, didn’t you have a cold? You better already?”

As I was about to knock on the door, Joshua came out just on cue. Perfect. I decided to ask him about the voices Chelsy mentioned.

“Oh, that! Yeah, voices are coming from the storeroom lately. All like, ”heeelp.” Which definitely means ghosts!“

For added flair, he raised both hands threateningly like he was about to attack me. But I guess my reaction was pretty meager, as he looked a little embarra.s.sed and slowly put his hands down.

”Have you gone to check what it is, Joshua?”

“Huh? Ugh, no way. I don’t wanna do that myself. Hey, not ‘cause I’m scared! Just because I think that stuff’s stupid!”

So Joshua said, but his legs were shaking a little. Maybe this time he was telling the truth. I just said “Got it,” and headed toward the stairs to the second floor.

“Hey, Allen, it’s bed time! Make sure Teacher doesn’t catch you! And if he does, don’t tell him I said anything!”, Joshua shouted from behind. But I only heard him faintly, more interested in the voices upstairs.

As I left the hallway to go up the stairs, I heard someone coming down them. Not good - was it Teacher? I stepped back and took a peek. It wasn’t Teacher coming downstairs, but Stella. There were a few books in her hands.

“…”

…The silence was heavy. Stella stared intensely at me. I found myself backing away. And she stepped closer to me as if refusing to let the distance between us widen.

“…Yes, you’re very strange. Because… you can speak.”

A soft, transient voice grazed my ears. I felt like I hadn’t heard her voice in forever.

“Probably because you don’t really feel like you’re alive. It’s the case with everyone here, but you most of all.”

…Was that a compliment? I puzzled over how to respond to that.

“No… Actually, you’re slightly different.” Ignoring me, she nodded with some kind of understanding. “…If you’re looking for Teacher, he’s not on the second floor. But you should finish any business you have quickly.”

Hearing her talk like she could see right through me made my heart pound a little. …She might have been scarier than any ghost. Once she’d pa.s.sed by me and I was sure she was out of sight, I went upstairs, careful not to make a sound.

It was already very dark on the second floor, and very silent. I felt around to find the storeroom door and nervously turned the k.n.o.b. It wasn’t locked.

The door opened with a creak. The room was dark and a little dusty.

I took a few steps forward and strained my ears. Other than what seemed to be a draft, I didn’t hear anything. Maybe it was just a tall tale after all. A little let down, I impulsively sighed. Just as I turned to go back to my room…

“…e…”

“Huh?” …Did I hear something?

“…p me…”

Something was there. But I could only hear the voice, and couldn’t be sure what it was. I fumbled around to get closer to the voice. My heartbeat got steadily louder.

“…Help me…”

I finally got right up to the source of the voice. I couldn’t see it clearly in the dim lighting, but I seemed to be right next to a model of a b.u.t.terfly.

Before I could even think, I tried to touch the b.u.t.terfly. It was placed high up, so I stretched to reach it. Still too far away, I got on my tiptoes, and my legs trembled. Just as I finally grabbed it, it slipped out of my hand.

Cras.h.!.+

The b.u.t.terfly model fell to my feet and shattered with a loud sound. Startled, I lept backward. …Bad. Really bad. I was turning pale, I knew. My heartbeat got louder still. And on top of that, I thought I heard laughter behind me.

3

…I had a terrible headache. Maybe I’d caught Allen’s cold. No, I knew better than anyone that wasn’t the reason. I was just approaching my limits again. I felt a familiar dizziness.

“…Yes, I need to check that all the doors are locked again. I know the library’s isn’t since Stella was there…”

I slowly lifted myself. Things hadn’t worsened enough yet that I couldn’t walk.

Cras.h.!.+

I heard something breaking upstairs. It was past bed time, but was someone still upstairs? It sounded like it came from the storeroom, but that was almost always locked…

…No, never mind that. I just need to see who it is. I hurried up and opened the storeroom door.

“Who’s there?!”

I turned on the lights to reveal a pale-faced Allen. Gla.s.s shards and a b.u.t.terfly model were scattered at his feet.

Allen’s body shook as he stared my way. Seeing the situation, I approached cautiously to avoid making him any more scared.

I kneeled down to his level and spoke softly. “…I heard a loud crash. What were you doing up here? I told you not to leave your room during bed time, didn’t I?”

Looking very ashamed, he mumbled, very quietly,

“…The b.u.t.terfly… said ”help me.”“

…The b.u.t.terfly spoke?

”…I see. Well, while that b.u.t.terfly may be pretty enough to look alive, it’s long since died. Something without a soul can’t speak, can it?“

My chest tightened from what I said. I was still tied down by the regret of that day.

”The model is all busted…”, Allen said, about to sob, and turned his eyes away and down.

I took Allen’s hand, and confirming that he didn’t have a scratch on him, felt relieved. His hand was still shaking. …Maybe I spoke too harshly.

“…You don’t seem hurt. That’s good. These gla.s.s shards are dangerous. I’ll clean them up, so go to your room and sleep.”

“I’m sorry…”, he quietly repeated again and again. Oh, this wasn’t good. This was dangerous.

“No need to apologize, really. Just don’t do it again. There there, there there, there, there… It’s okay.”

I gently held Allen’s hands and recited my charm. He looked back at me with wide eyes. Did I say something unusual?

…At any rate, I stood up to get him out of the room, when suddenly there was a shrill sound in my ears.

“Is it reeeally okay?”

“…!”

I heard a voice from somewhere. An unpleasant voice I knew well.

“Are you okay, Teacher?”

I looked up in surprise. Allen was looking at me worriedly. “I’m fine,” I insisted, and led him out.

Once I’d seen him go down the stairs, I responded to the voice without turning around. “…You were watching?”

“Boy, you look like you swallowed somethin’ sour! Was hopin’ for a bit of a better reception after all this time.”

I felt something coiling on my back. I was more and more discomforted.

“You’ve known for ages, haven'tcha? Now, what’s it gonna be?”

A distinctive laugh made my skin crawl. I turned around and spoke to the source of the voice.

“…I have a favor to ask you.”

4

All the lights were out on the first floor, giving it an ominous air. I followed the walls back to my room.

“There there…”

Why did Teacher say the same charm the girl did in my dream? And what was that voice calling for help, anyway? Lots of questions floated around in my head unanswered.

“…I’m sleepy.”

Even thought I’d slept soundly all day, I felt intensely drowsy. I went to the closet to change into my pajamas and put a hand on the door.

“Meow.”

“…?”

Something black was by my feet. I couldn’t see it clearly in the darkness.

“Meooow,” it said with a cat-like voice. But something about it seemed unlike a cat. What was that about? It rubbed its face against my leg and put a paw on the closet door.

“You want to go inside?”, I asked, knowing it wouldn’t actually be able to talk back.

“…Won’t you open it, Alice?”

I jumped and looked around for who said that. I checked again and again, but there was no one around the room but me and the cat at my feet. Did the cat speak…?

“Don’t act so surprised. You read stories with talkin’ worms and mice, don’t you?”

One of its golden eyes gleamed in the dark. Its jagged white teeth raised high enough to nearly reach where its ears would be.

“…Stories are different from reality.”

“Oho! Then what if you’re in a dream?”

In a dream? Then sure, I could see the kind of things I’d see in stories, and have strange experiences. But did that explain what was happening now? Maybe I was already dreaming, hence talking to a cat?

“Not to worry. You always wake up from dreams. And whether somethin’ wakes you up, or you tear it apart yourself, that’s all down to what happens in the dream! So what’ll it be, Alice?”

Was this cat I’d been talking to referring to me when he said “Alice”? Didn’t the real “Alice” chase after a white rabbit and fall down its rabbit hole? But my invitation to Wonderland was coming from a cat with one eye creepily floating in the darkness, and this was a closet, not a rabbit hole. …I couldn’t make sense of it, and it spun around in my head.

The cat started clawing at the closet to hurry me up. There was a door to a World of dreams in front of me.

After a slight hesitation, I opened the door with both hands.

“The front cover is open! Welcome, Alice. Time for a fun dream to begin!”

…Deep in my ears, there were many metallic sounds overlapping each other. My body felt weightless, like I was thrown into zero-gravity. My eyelids were heavy, and felt sewn shut; I couldn’t open them.

…Where was this? I tried to move my limbs, but it was futile.

“…”

I thought I heard someone speak. But it was drowned out by an unpleasant buzzing.

Something warm touched my chest. And the warmth dragged me along…

“…Huh?”

When I woke up, I was lying in bed. …Did I fall asleep after that? I crawled out of the covers and put my feet on the floor. I was still wearing my shoes.

I stood up and looked around. This wasn’t my room. …So where was it? My head was hazy, and I couldn’t think for too long.

The drab wooden floor had fallen through in places, and if there was anything below, it was enshrouded in thick darkness. There weren’t any walls or anything, only a path.

I proceeded along it, careful of the holes. It all looked the same, so I became worried whether I was actually getting anywhere.

After walking a while, I saw a human figure. …No, upon closer inspection, his lower half was decidedly not human. He wore something like a cape with a hood, and down below, a long tail flitted around. I nervously approached, and the figure’s eyes darted toward me.

“Jesus! What the hey?! Now if this isn’t a strange little human I’ve never seen before!”

He peered at me with a repulsive grin. His body, like a human body with cat parts stuck on, staggered around in front of me. The shape of his head was obscured by the hood.

“What’s up? Anything’s on your mind, I can answer, Alice!”

Upon him saying “Alice,” I retraced my memory. Come to think of it, he resembled that cat who had tempted me to open the closet door. The single eye floating in his hood was one with the cat’s singular eye in my mind. So was I in a dream like the cat had said?

“Yes indeedy!”, the cat-like creature responded clownishly to my unspoken question. “If you say you’re dreaming, Alice, then this is a dream. Because here, everything depends on what Alice says and does!”

“I’m not Alice. I have a name, it’s Allen,” I retorted, keeping in my irritation. Maybe I felt some fear of even that one thing I had left being changed into something else.

“Not your name, huh? Oh, no no, Alice is Alice. And that’s because I say so!”

My head reeled.

“That contradicts what I just said? Maybe you’re onto something, kid. This place is chock full of weirdos, so I’m just one of 'em. Mweeheeheehee!”

He went on egotistically answering questions I wasn’t asking. I judged at this point that I wouldn’t be getting along with this denizen of my dream.

“Oh, don’t say that. You don’t wanna stop in the middle of a good meal, do ya? Same for dreams. This World’s only just been made. You gotta savor the taste.”

His gold eye narrowed, and he smirked. …Disgusting.

“Oop! Well, I’m busier than I look. Alright, I’ll smell ya!

The cat-like creature decided it was time to part ways, and vanished just as he turned his body. What was that all about? I started back on the path in front of me to get away from my surmounting unease.

After traveling a little ways, I reached a large plaza-like area. It was surrounded with iron bars, and the floor was paved with cracked stones. Numerous objects that looked like graves were placed around.

In the center was a figure different from the cat. It had strange hair that parted oddly into tree branches. Rabbit-like ears grew out of its head, but one of them was torn up, like a monster had bitten it off.

The rabbit-like creature beckoned to me to come closer once it noticed my presence. The whites of its eyes were stained black, and pupils like red moons floated in the center. They frightened me, and I pondered whether I should go over there.

”…Would you hurry it up?“, he said, annoyed. So he can talk, too. He was only getting more impatient as I thought, so I hurried over.

”Sigh… You’re the sixth one, and my fifth explanation. What a pain. And after all my insisting that they come in groups…”

He murmured complaints seemingly not to anyone but himself. His skin was extremely white, and didn’t feel alive. While he did have a rabbit-like tail, I feared he would probably kill me if I tried to touch it right now.

“Ah… Sorry. You caught me at a bad time.” The deadly anger quickly vanis.h.i.+ng from his face, he shuffled his posture and cleared his throat.

“Good evening, Alice, and welcome. You’ve done well. I’m the White Rabbit, a guide of this World. It’s a rather big place, so call me if you need anything.” The White Rabbit seemed quite familiar with this spiel.

“…Though I should note, I won’t move from this spot. It’s just a pain, really. So to enter the Worlds, you’ll have to… Hm? Those numbers don’t add up. Why is that…?”

Was there a problem? The White Rabbit began to worry. But a short time later, he found even that action to be too much trouble and took a breath.

“…Well, all right. You see, rather troublingly, I’ve lost the keys to the World doors. Of the five, four have been stolen by a certain individual. …And I think I can hazard a guess as to who.”

His forehead wrinkled like he’d suddenly acquired a pounding headache. His earlier gentle expression once again changed to one full of bloodl.u.s.t.

“As previously stated, I don’t want to move an inch. So, Alice, I’d like to ask you to recover them. …How does that sound?”

He glared at me, unwilling to take no for an answer. This was an entirely different beast from the White Rabbit I knew.

“…Well, I’ll make you do it whether you like it or not. Luckily, I do have one of the World keys on hand, so you can already go in one. Knowing who we’re dealing with, I’m sure he’s scattered them all across the Worlds. You’re likely to find them just wandering around.”

The White Rabbit continued explaining without breaking for a reply. What was with these people? They all acted like the world revolved around them.

“…Don’t be shy about asking any other questions you may have,” he added like an afterthought, seeing my concern. “But I’ll only answer up to three.”

…Would he actually answer them? There was a lot I still hadn’t put together, but for now I asked a question.

“What’s a ”World”?“

”…Generally speaking, a World is a place that embodies the hidden side of an Alice’s heart. Because their surface heart is soon to vanish, you see. They may be locked or unlocked, but primarily are locked. People don’t like others trampling on their hearts, after all. I manage the keys, so just ask, and you can go in and out.“

The White Rabbit took a short pause and smiled disagreeably. ”Of course, that is a.s.suming you can recover them, Alice.”

A haziness that was sitting in the corner of my heart welled up again. I tried to keep it aside and asked another question.

“What was that cat creature I met before coming here? Is he a guide like you?”

“…The Ches.h.i.+re Cat, you mean. As you say, he is another guide. If you met him already, then I shouldn’t need to say a word. The sight of him makes me sick. Fills me with repugnance.”

I nodded slightly to show my agreement. I didn’t speak, though, because I felt that the White Rabbit’s obvious anger was starting to warp reality. Though if you ask me, I don’t think either answer would change much.

“I have him to thank for this ear, too, and this off-color skin. Our tastes don’t match at all, and frankly I hate everything about him. …Next time we meet, I’d like to give him a piece of my mind.”

He went on muttering curses and ill wishes. I took a few steps back. I worried that saying something even a little upsetting might cause him to give me a piece of his mind.

After watching from a distance for a while, the White Rabbit yawned loudly, either refreshed or bored. I was unsure whether he might just fall asleep on the spot, but he beckoned me to come back, and I complied.

“I can answer one more question for you. How about it?” …I still sensed a little bit of irritation.

“Um… What do you like, Mr. White Rabbit?”

I was looking for a safe question to get away from the other stuff, but as soon as I said it, I felt like I’d messed up. There’s nothing more boring than having to answer a question about yourself.

I felt the blood drain from my face, but looking at the White Rabbit’s, he didn’t seem especially displeased.

“Me? Other than being a guide… …I like children, I suppose.”

I opened the door indicated by the White Rabbit with care. It was dark on the other side, and I couldn’t see a thing.

“…The lights will come on eventually. Just watch out for you-know-who.” The White Rabbit still hadn’t moved an inch, and waved me off to say “get going already.” It kind of annoyed me, but knowing it wouldn’t do any good to stay here, I proceeded through the door.

In the darkness, I found some stairs. I carefully went up the steps one at a time, holding onto the handrail. Just as I reached the top step, my vision went white and I reflexively shut my eyes.

“Yo! You doing well for yourself? I’m feelin’ fiiine.”

A voice came at my back, and my spine s.h.i.+vered. I didn’t need to turn around to know who it was.

My vision was still fuzzy, but I ignored him and tried to go forward. Instantly, the Ches.h.i.+re Cat behind my back was grinning in front of me.

“Goin’ for a walk? Or you lookin’ for something?” He spun a key around one of his claws.

“Keys? Wouldn’t know, no sir. That’s the truth and nothin’ but. Sure, I did steal 'em. But only 'cause some

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