Part 6 (1/2)
When I returned to the hospital the ”English Invasion” of the town was an accomplished fact, and the Casino had been taken over as a hospital for our men. In the rush after Festubert, we were very proud to be called upon to a.s.sist for the time-being in transporting wounded, as the British Red Cross ambulances had more than they could cope with. This was the first official driving we did and was to lead to greater things.
The heat that summer was terrific, so five of us clubbed together and rented a Chalet on the beach, which was christened _The Filbert_. We bathed in our off time (when the jelly fish permitted, for, whenever it got extra warm, a whole plague of them infested the sea, and hot vinegar was the only cure for their stinging bites; of course we only found this out well on into the jelly-fish season!). We gave tea parties and supper parties there, weather and work permitting, and it proved the greatest boon to us after long hours in hospital.
As we were never free to use it in the morning we lent it to some friends, and one day a fearful catastrophe happened. Fresh water was as hard to get as in a desert, and the only way to procure any was to bribe French urchins to carry it in large tin jugs from a spring near the Casino. These people, one of whom was the big Englishman, after running up from the sea used the water they saw in the jugs to wash the sand off (after all, quite a natural proceeding) and then, in all ignorance of their fearful crime, virtuously filled them up again, _but_ from the sea!
That afternoon Lowson happened to be giving a rather swell and diplomatic tea party. Gaily she filled the kettle and set it on the stove and then made the tea. The Matron of the hospital took a sip and the Colonel ditto, and then they both put their cups down--(I was not present, but as _my_ friends committed the crime, you may be sure I heard all about it, and feel as if I had been). Of course the generally numerous French urchins were nowhere in sight, and everyone went home from that salt-water tea party with a terrible thirst!
A Remount Camp was established at Fort Neuillay. It was an interesting fact that the last time the fort had been used was by English troops when that part of the coast was ours. One of the officers there possessed a beagle called ”Flanders.” She was one of the survivors of that famous pack taken over in 1914 that so staggered our allies. One glorious ”half-day” off duty, riding across some fields we started a beautiful hare. Besides ”Flanders” there was a terrier and a French dog of uncertain breed, and in two seconds the ”pack” was in full cry after ”puss,” who gave us the run of our lives. Unfortunately the hunt did not end there, as some French farmers, not accustomed to the rare sight of half a couple and two mongrels hot after a hare scudding across their fields, lodged a complaint! When the owner of the beagle was called up by the Colonel for an explanation he explained himself in this wise.
”It was like this, Sir, the beagle got away after the hare, and we thought it best to follow up to bring her back. You see, Sir, don't you?”
”Yes, I _do_ see,” said the Colonel, with a twinkle. ”Well, don't let it happen again, or she must be destroyed.”
A Y.M.C.A. was also established, and Mr. Sitters, the organiser, begged us to get up a concert party and amuse the men. In those days Lena Ashwell's parties were quite unknown, and the men often had to rely on themselves for entertainment. Our free time was very precious, and we were often so tired it was a great undertaking to organise rehearsals, but this Sergt. Wicks did, and very soon we had quite a good show going.
One day Mr. Sitters obtained pa.s.ses for us to go far up into the English lines, and for days beforehand rehearsals were held in the oddest places.[10] Up to the last minute we were on duty in the wards, and all those who could gave a helping hand to get us off--seven in all, as more could not be spared. It was pouring with rain, but we did not mind.
We had had such a rush to get ready and collect such properties as we needed that, as often happens on these occasions, we were all in the highest spirits and the show was bound to go well.
We sped along in the ambulance, ”Uncle” driving, and picking up Mr.
Sitters _en route_. Our only pauses were at the barriers of the town, and on we went again. We had been doing a good 35 and had slowed up to pa.s.s some vehicles going over a bridge, when the pin came out of the steering rod. If we had not slowed up I can't imagine there would have been much of the concert party left to perform!
We pulled up and began to look for it, hoping, as it had just happened, we might see it lying on the road. Luckily for us at that moment an English officer drove up and stopped to see if he could be of any help.
He heard where we were bound for, and, as time was getting on, instantly suggested we should borrow his car and driver and he would wait until it came back. Mr. Sitters was only too delighted to accept the offer as it was getting so late.
He suggested that four of us should get into the officer's car and go ahead with him and begin the show, leaving the others to follow. We were a little dubious as our Lieutenant, Sister Lampen, and ”Auntie” (the Matron) were over the brow of the hill searching for the missing pin!
There seemed nothing else to be done, however, so in we all bundled.
The officer was very sporting and wished us ”good luck” as we sped off in his car.
Farther along, as we got nearer the front, all the sentries were English which seemed very strange to us. Pa.s.sing through a village where a lot of our troops were billeted they gazed in wonder and amazement at the sight of English girls in that district.
One incident we thought specially funny--It may not seem particularly so now, but when you think that for months past we had only had dealings with French and Belgian soldiers, you will understand how it amused us.
Outside an _Estaminet_ was a horse and cart partly across the road, and just sufficiently blocking it. The driver called out to a Tommy lounging outside the Inn to pull it over a little. He gave a truly British grunt, and went to the horse's head. Nothing happened for some seconds, and we waited impatiently. Presently he reappeared.
”Tied oop,” he said laconically, in a broad north country accent, and washed his hands of the matter. How we laughed. Of course a Frenchman would have made the most elaborate apologies and explanations--a long conversation would have ensued, and finally salutes and bows exchanged, before we could have got on. ”Tied oop” became quite a saying after that.
A F.A.N.Y. eventually coped with the matter, and on we went again. At last we espied some tents in the distance and struck off down a rutty lane in their direction. Here we said ”good-bye” to our driver wondering if the other car did not turn up, just how we should get home.
We plunged through mud that came well over the tops of our boots and, scrambling along some slippery duck boarding, arrived at the recreation tent. No sign of the other car, so we were obliged to draft out a fresh programme in the meantime.
We took off our heavy coats while two batmen used the back of their clasp knives to sc.r.a.pe off the first layers of mud (hardly the most attractive footlight wear) from our boots. We heard the M.C. announcing that the ”Concert party” had arrived, and through holes in the canvas we could see the tent was full to overflowing. Cheers greeted the announcement, and we s.h.i.+vered with fright. There were hundreds there, and they had been patiently waiting for hours, singing choruses to pa.s.s the time.
As we crawled through the canvas at the back of the stage they cheered us to the echo. The platform was about the size of a dining table, which rather cramped our style. We always began our shows with a topical song, each taking a verse in turn, and then all singing the chorus. Towards the end of our first song the Lieutenant and the others arrived. The guns boomed so loudly at times the words were quite drowned. The Programme consisted of Recitations, Songs at the Piano, Solo Songs, Choruses, Violin, etc.; and to my horror I found they counted on me to do charcoal drawings, described out of courtesy as ”Lightning sketches!” (an art only developed and cultivated at the insistence of Sergt. Wicks, who had once discovered me doing some in the wards to amuse the men). There was nothing else for it, rolls of white paper were produced and pinned on a table placed on end, and off I started. I first drew them a typical Belgian officer with lots of Medals which brought forth the remark that he ”must have been through the South African Campaign!” When I got to his boots, which I did with a good high light down the centre, someone called out ”Don't forget the Cherry Blossom boot polish, Miss.” ”What price, _Kiwi_?” etc. When he was finished they yelled ”Souvenir, souvenir,” so I handed it over amid great applause, and felt full of courage! The Crown Prince went down very well and I was grateful to him for having such a long nose. ”We don't want him as no souvenir,” they called--”Wish we drew our pay as fast as you draw little Willie, Miss.” The Kaiser of course had his share, and in his first stages, to their great joy, evidently resembled one of their officers!
(There's nothing Tommy enjoys quite so much as that.)
After the ”Nut” before the war (complete in Opera hat and monocle) and ”now” in khaki, I could think of nothing more, and boldly, but with some trepidation, asked if any gentleman in the audience would care to be drawn. You can imagine the scene. A tent packed with Tommies, every available place taken up, and those who could not find seats sitting on the floor right up to the edge of the stage. Yells of delight greeted the invitation, and several made as if to come forward; finally, one unfortunate was heaved up from the struggling ma.s.s on to the stage. I always noticed after this that whenever I offered to draw anyone it was always a man with absolutely _no_ particularly ”salient” feature (I think that is the term) who presented himself. This individual could best be described as ”sandy” in appearance, there was simply _nothing_ about him to caricature, I thought in despair! The remarks from the audience, which had been amusing before, now fairly bristled with wit, mostly of a personal nature. My subject became hotter and hotter as I seized the charcoal pencil and set off. ”Wot _would_ Liza say?” called out one in a horrified voice. ”Don't smile, mate, yer might 'urt yer fice,” called another. ”Take 'is temperature, Miss,” they called, as the perspiration began to roll off him in positive rivulets, and ”_Don't_ forget 'is auburn 'air,” they implored. As the poor unfortunate had just been shorn like a lamb, preparatory to going into the trenches, this was particularly cutting. The remark, however, gave me an inspiration and the audience yelled delightedly while I put a few black dots, very wide apart, to indicate the shortage. When finished we shook hands to show there was no ill feeling, and quite cheerfully, with the expression of a hero, he bore his portrait off amid cheers from the men.
The show ended with a song, _Sergeant Michael Ca.s.sidy_, which was extremely popular at that time. For those who have not heard this cla.s.sic, it might be as well to give one or two verses. We each had our own particular one, and then all sang the chorus.
”You've heard of Michael Ca.s.sidy, a strapping Irish bhoy.
Who up and joined the Irish guards as Kitchener's pride and joy; When on the march you'll hear them shout, 'Who's going to win the war?'