Part 4 (1/2)

”Denise!” he said, ”you understand, dear?”

”Yes.” I could barely whisper the word; and then he bent down and kissed me softly on the forehead, and the touch of his lips seemed to burn into me like a red-hot seal. With a little cry I rose to my feet, and hardly knowing what I was doing, ran past him, never stopping until I reached my room. Here I remained as if lost in a dream, with a hundred mad thoughts dancing in my brain. I tried to pray, but my lips could only frame words, for there was nothing in my heart; and then I thought I would seek forgetfulness in sleep. But sleep would not come, and I lay awake watching the broad banner of moonlight that came in through the open window, and all the memories of the past awake within me. De Clermont's kiss still burned hotly on my face, and I s.h.i.+vered with the shame and the sin of it, for I was another's wife--and Heaven help me! I thought then that I loved de Clermont. Oh! the misery of those hours, when I tossed from side to side with dry, burning eyes and bitter shame in my heart. At last, as the moon was paling, I could endure it no longer, and, rising from my bed, began to pace the room.

I felt that what I needed was motion, movement--I could not be still.

If I could only pray! and as the thought came to me once more I heard a little _clink_, and stooping, picked up a small locket containing a miniature of my mother which I wore round my neck, the gold chain by which it was suspended having broken in my restless movements. I opened the locket, and standing near the window looked at the picture, and as I live it seemed to lighten so that I could see each feature, with the soft eyes bent on me in pity; and then a voice--it was her voice--said:

”Denise, pray!”

And then my eyes were blinded with tears, and flinging myself on my knees with my hands clasped on the mullions of the window I sobbed out, ”G.o.d! Dear G.o.d! Have pity on me!”

I could say no more, but my whole soul went out with these words and I knelt there, still and motionless, with the sense of a great peace falling upon me. Then it was as if the very heavens grew bright as day, and the light filled my room so that my eyes were dazzled and I could not see. And I covered my face with my hands to s.h.i.+eld my eyes from the splendour.

When I looked up again the glory was gone, but my soul was at rest. I stood at the window and let the cool breeze fan me, whilst I peered out into the darkness, for the moon had sunk and it was now the black hour that touches the dawn. As I watched I heard the bells of St.

Etienne calling the Lauds across the grave of the night, and I knew that in two hours it would be daylight, and felt that the Unseen G.o.d had heard my prayer.

CHAPTER V.

M. LE MARQUIS LEADS HIS HIGHEST TRUMP.

When I came down in the morning I found we were all ready to start.

Madame was mounted, and de Clermont was standing to a.s.sist me to my horse. It all seemed so strange after the crisis of last night. I had not schooled myself. I had not had time to meet de Clermont with unconcern, and overcome by a sudden shyness I declined his aid, and he said in his cool, level voice:

”You are very proud this morning.”

The touch of proprietors.h.i.+p in his tone, which he so often used towards me, and to which I had hitherto submitted, jarred on me now, and in a moment my courage had come back. I looked him full in the face and answered:

”It is necessary to be proud sometimes, monsieur.”

Our eyes held each other for an instant, and for the first time I saw in his clear blue glance an expression of hesitation and surprise, and I felt that the compelling power of his look was gone, and then--he dropped his gaze, and stepping back lifted his hat without a word; but I saw the white line of his teeth close on his nether lip.

Then we started, and de Clermont dropped away to the rear of the party, leaving Madame de Termes and myself alone. She was full of the strange song of last night.

”I had heard of his voice before,” she said, ”but never thought it was anything like that. St. Siege!” and she gave a little shudder. ”I am an old woman; but it was maddening. I forgot everything. I could think of nothing except that sorrow in that last verse--the poor man, the poor man!” And the dear old lady's eyes filled once more with tears at the recollection. ”But it was not a good song,” she went on in a moment, ”it was a beautiful evil thing, and he shall sing it no more.

I will speak to him. It is wrong. It is wicked to touch the heart as that song can. He is very silent and grave to-day. I wonder if it affected him as it did me?”

But I made no answer, for my mind was full of other things, of the hopeless love in the heart that I thought so strong and brave, and of the wondrous power that had come over me and enabled me to be victor over myself, and I cast up an unspoken prayer that this strength should be continued to me, and then I found de Clermont once more by my side.

Madame kept her word about the song, and he said gravely:

”I promise. I will never sing it again. It hurts me, too,” and, changing the subject, other matters were spoken about. In a little I found myself separated from Madame, and de Clermont, bending forward, said:

”I have news I should have given before that will interest you, madame--something you ought to know--of M. de Lorgnac.”

”Is it really of importance?”

”I think so. It will remain for you to decide.”