Volume 28 Chapter 6 (1/2)

”Onee-chan”

It was the evening of January 10 - the week-long New Year's festivities were over and it was the day before Kaga of the rice cakes - when le photograph

”What do you want?”

I brusquely lifted aze from the university textbook

As always

I'enerally treat their little sisters, but I never welco that to change it now just felt wrong

Shouko and I were the real deal, blood related sisters, but our appearance and personality, and while I'm at it even our names, were completely different Either because of that, or the three-year age gap between us, we never really fought, but neither did our relationshi+p develop to the point where we could talk to each other about anything and everything

So when my little sister came to e dictionary I owned, or so similar, and even that happened very rarely

”Onee-chan, this is for you… ”

And despite that, she was now earnestly offering me this snapshot

”What the heck is this?”

The expression on Shouko's face said that she was still undecided about whether or not she should be showing raph

”Let's see it”

I took the photograph from my little sister's hand and looked at it And then, immediately

I was speechless

Fro the photograph, it was obviously taken at a shi+nto shrine during the New Year's celebrations

Shouko had gone on the traditional New Year's shrine visit with a friend from school this year Consequently, I expected it to be a photo that was taken then, but I rong

The raph I realized it wasn't soraph

”… How?”

Unable to conceal ht at my little sister

In the center of the photograph was a girl, s brilliantly, who up until last year had been my classmate at school

That classmate always looked untroubled as she walked ahead of me

If asked, she'd probably say it wasn't like that at all No, she'd definitely say that But, back then, that was the only way I thought of her Looking untroubled as she walked ahead of me

She looked as though she never studied, either at school or at hoot near perfect scores on the tests She always had a bored expression on her face, but was effortlessly at the center of attention

I couldn't stand that type of person I didn't go as far as wishi+ng ill upon her, but I couldn't accept all the things she achieved It just felt like her entire existence was a co one

So I stuck tothat I would overtake her and therefore retain my self-respect

My plan was to get accepted into some super-elite university where she couldn't follow, and then bid farewell to h-school life

So I devotedtowards graduation day when I would smile victoriously I didn'trelationshi+ps while I was at Lillian's Girls Acade neither a petit soeur nor an onee-sama

But when I opened the lid, what did I find? She hadn't even shown up to fight

What did it ain

I knew all about rade inflation, but how could someone like enerally acknowledged as the top university in the country not win? That was just idiotic

But that idiocy was reality

She was continuing her studies at the fine arts department of another university What a joke

When I first heard about her choice, I actually broke into laughter

But with this, there was no contest

In much the same way that you can't coh they're both contact sports, they're just too different They're literally two different arenas

I lost sight of h ood job was hazing over

What happened? I hadn't thought that I'd been studying on account of her But after entering university, I found that studying just wasn't as fun without her untroubled visage walking ahead of me

That state of affairs continued day after day for about eight months, until one day

It would have been around the middle of December when I saw 'that'

I went to my little sister's room, for the first tilish dictionary she had borrowed froht before

Shouko wasn't there She'd gone to school

Since I was only looking for my book, I didn't hesitate to open the door She'd occasionally go intoour roo with it Anything of value to her would probably be in her drawers, and I wasn't going to open those, so I thought there'd be nothing to worry about

I first looked over her study desk But my dictionary wasn't there So I slowly spun around, taking in the whole room

The items on the built-in bookshelf didn't see - there were teen novels, books about sweets, teen fashi+on azines and favorite stuffed anied haphazardly No, there probably was a method to it A method called, ”Girl's Bookshelf”

”Hmmm”

I had a bookshelf roughly identical to that one in my room, but the contents were completely different

This was a new experience

It wasn't quite jealousy It was just, no, it was exactly that

In the end, I found my dictionary on top of her bed She probably put it there when she wasto return it on the way out of the house, but then forgot about it

Now that I had achieved oal, I fully intended to leave ht at that limpse of a reflection that caused ree turn

I walked over to the bookshelf

I ranthe spine of the book that seemed out of place on a ”Girl's Bookshelf”

”A photography book…?”

Not a collection of photographs But a technical reference about caraphy

”What would this kind of thing be doing in Shouko's room?”

When er she had adorable features My parents were persuaded by some of their acquaintances and, for a while, she had been a child raphs had probably come from that stint as a model But despite that -

”I wonder if so happened to her… ”

Come to think of it, I knew all kinds of corammar points, but I knew very little about my little sister

From an older sister's point-of-view, ”Naitou Shouko” was a soirl who hated to study but other than that was probably having an enjoyable school-life A silly girl

”But”

Would a girl who hated studying borrow a dictionary fro with all that well?

”That's right”

Shouko had a japanese-English dictionary …, no, make that two Either of those should have sufficed for first-year high-school hoh it looked like they were from a different publisher I suppose our parents were only rew

”That reminds me”

What Shouko had borroas the number one ranked, most densely packed with inforh-school, I would beg my parents to buy me these as birthday and Christmas parents

I wanted to know more I wanted to understand more

Shouko andwe craved

I put the photography book back on the bookshelf At which point, so the book out and then putting it back seemed to have disrupted their balance

(Disrupted?)

But it looked like the books were all lined up alongside each other without a gap between the sandwiched by the books on either side, looked as though it was placed free standing beside the books on my side

”… Right?”

With an o, I checked the book that I inferred to be free standing and found it was actually being used toaway froap of approximately 15cm appeared

”Why such an elaborate setup?”

Adorning that spot, hidden away froaze, was a photo frame Inside that raph of two young wo school uniforms

It was myself and Shouko

Taking great care not to disturb the books on either side, I timidly picked up the photo frame

- No doubt about it I felt a little bit giddy

Why would Shouko have this? Who on earth could have taken that photograph?

But asking Shouko about the picture frame she had setup in a hidden location on her bookshelf was so that I was reluctant to do, even as her sister

I couldn't just barge in to her private life

But even so That photograph was fixed in my mind forever

I couldn't believe that I could look as beautiful as I did in that photo

The expression I had in that picture was nowhere to be found in my own photo albums In both the class photos and the snapshots from athletics carnivals and school festivals, I always had this tense look that see to fail?”

In contrast, the classmate who looked untroubled as she walked ahead of me was always beautiful

Herface, her icy smile All of her various facial expressions were radiant like a flower

When ere in the sa so an ene so far as to scowl at the camera lens

Just what on earth had I been fighting?

The person I thought I had been fighting had been paying absolutely no attention to me

For the first ti at thea few tears

Now I understood In reality, I was still the saraph in Shouko's rooently and at peace with that classmate

(But it's too late now … )

I wiped away my tears and hurriedly closed the album

It wasn't like oals had probably caused o soft

If only I'd realized this before graduation Now that ere going to different universities there was nothing much I could do about it Even I knew that

I went for the traditional New Year's shrine visit on January 2, this year The shrine I visited was close to my alma mater, Lillian's Girls Academy

Was it nostalgia?

No, I didn't go there because I wanted to return toas repayht there last year

”Looks like no-one's going to show up, after all”

Standing in front of the shrine's torii, I looked at hed It was already twenty minutes past one in the afternoon

”I wasn't really expecting much”

Still, I hadn't expected that I would be the only one ould show up, as arranged

Can't do anything about that Given how things had turned out, I thought I'd do what I caer, it didn't look like anyone else was going to coed a ti to be late

It was on this very day, last year Four classmates came to this place for their first shrine visit of the New Year We were high-school third-years, preparing for exams

The organizer (not myself) had apparently invited everyone in our class as sitting for exams but the first three days of the new year are always busy so not everyone could attend Naturally, ”that girl” had also been invited, but she just looked uninterested as she fiddled with her hair and muttered:

”I'd like to go, but my family always spends New Year's in Hawaii”

I watched that happen fro feelings I felt when I heard that she wasn't going to be there - part of me was relieved, but part ofceremony

When the day arrived there were only four people, including e bond there, perhaps because of the haphazard way the group was asseive thanks at the sa year

But it looked like nobody else reo

Maybe they forgot about it as soon as they passed their exams Maybe they didn't have time to look back at their old friends now that they were following their new life At any rate, a no-show is a no-show

I walked alone, following the same path into the shrine that we had taken last year I stopped in front of the offering box, threw soether in prayer and reported my success

Thinking back on it, it's a bit strange that a group of students at a Catholic school would see no proble to a shi+nto shrine to pray for success in their exaarden that was Lillian's, those kind of feelings were s that only becomes visible when you take a step back from it

(Although it's interesting to note that the fortune papers offered at shi+nto shrines were first used by the Tendai sect of Buddhists)

Since he died on the third day of the year, he became known as Gansan Daishi+[1] Since tomorroould be the anniversary of his death, I took a fortune paper as a way of showing my respect

- A blessing