Part 10 (1/2)
I swear my whole body blushes. Im such an idiot. I didnt mean”
He scoots a little closer so our legs touch, which makes me all kinds of nervous. What if I am?
I stare at him. Am what?
Interested in you. He lets it linger in the air for a moment and I cant look away from him. His eyes slide over my features and I s.h.i.+ver. Normally a guy would give up on a girl who tried to insult them every time they were around, but not me. I know theres more to you than that. I watched you last year. And not in a creepy way, I swear. Ive just noticed things. Youre loyal to your friends. You care about people you love, more than you care about yourself. When I first met you, you were very friendly and welcomed me into your group even though you didnt know me at all. I havent forgotten that. He smiles and then his face grows serious and he frowns. But then I took captain from you and something changed. And Im sorry. I made you hate me before you even got to know me.
I want to tell him its not all his fault. Maybe a tiny bit, but when Lucas told me his cancer was back, that did it. It changed my outlook on everything. It changed me. It wasnt you, I whisper.
Then what was it?
I dont want to talk about Lucas right now, so all I do is shake my head and play with the ring around my finger.
Its because of that boy, right? The one who died a few months ago.
My heart feels like it might stop as the breath whooshes from my lungs. I dont answer, just keep twisting my ring around my finger.
I didnt know him, but I heard he was a good guy. Were you two close?
I bite my lip and give a slight nod. Yes.
Im sorry.
I shrug. I dont know what else to do.
He folds his arms and stares into the parking lot with me. Voices echo from the bowling alley. People laugh, bowling b.a.l.l.s crash into pins. Its so loud in there. Chaotic. Its just as chaotic in my head.
So I was wondering something.
I jump as his voice pulls me out of my stare. Okay. Hopefully he changes the subject.
What are you doing Friday night?
I lean away from him as my eyes grow wide. Cole, dont.
Why not?
I you have a girlfriend.
Last time I checked, I didnt.
What about Whitney?
What about her?
She likes you.
So? I dont like her. Like that anyway.
You two had a fling or something, though.
I wouldnt call it a fling. She was nice to me. And I could tell she kind of liked me. When youre new to a school and dont know anyone, you attach yourself to the people who accept you. After hanging out with her a few times, I realized she wasnt my type.
I bite my lip. What about the other girls?
What other girls?
I laugh. People talk. Im not going to be like every other girl at our school.
His eyes narrow and he clenches his jaw. You believe everything you hear?
Ever since you came here, all Ive heard are rumors. Who youve been with, and whatever else you like to do.
Been where with?
I sneak a look at him and hes grinning. You know what I mean.
He laughs. Loud. Thats pretty funny. And the keyword for tonight? Rumors. Not truths. Just because Im nice to people doesnt mean Im some player who sleeps with every girl he meets.
There wouldnt be any rumors if you didnt.
He smiles. Everyone has baggage, Emmy. Even you, Im sure. And rumors dont do anyone any favors.
Do truths?
He shrugs. Depends on the truth.
Tell me a truth then, I challenge. So I know what to really believe.
Why should I?
Because apparently all I know are rumors.
He studies me for a long time before leaning in and tugging on a strand of my hair. I kind of like it that way. He lets go and leans back again, still watching me.
I let out a frustrated breath. What is the point of this conversation then?
Does there have to be a point to every conversation?
I glare at him. Same old Cole. I do have an opinion of him. Jerk.
But now Im curious. Curious to what truth hes hiding from me. From everyone. I look over at him to find his eyes on me. Challenging me.
The thing is, I dont have a clue what to say.
Youre tongue-tied. That doesnt happen very often, does it? He smiles, his face inching toward mine.