Part 43 (2/2)
”Why not?”
”You have said it yourself, Lou. I shall be a fugitive from justice .
. . a man with whom no decent woman would care to link her fate.”
”Let us admit then,” she said almost gaily, ”that I am not a decent woman, for my fate is irretrievably linked with yours.”
”This is preposterous . . .” he began.
But already she had interrupted him, speaking quietly in that even, contralto voice of hers which he loved to hear.
”Luke,” she said, ”you must try and understand. You must, because I have so fully made up my mind, that nothing that you could say would make me change it, unless you told me that you no longer loved me. And this,” she added with the ghost of a smile, ”you cannot now pretend, Luke, after all that you said just now. It is not that my mind wanted making up. My mind has very little to do with it all. It knows just as my heart does that I could not now live without you. I'm not talking nonsense, Luke, and I seem to be too old for mere sentimental twaddle; therefore, when I say that I could not now live parted from you, I say it from the innermost conviction of my heart. Sh--sh--dear,” she whispered, seeing that he wished to interrupt her, ”don't try and say anything just yet--not just yet--until I have told you everything. I want you to remember, Luke, that I am no longer very young, and that ever since I can remember anything, I have loved you. I must have loved you even though I did not know it. But if you had never spoken of love to me, if you had never written that letter which I received in Brussels, I probably would have been satisfied to go on with my humdrum life to the end of time; who knows? I might have found contentment if not happiness, by and by with some other man. We women are meant to marry. Men are fond of telling us that our only mission on earth is to marry. But all this possible, quiet content one letter has dissipated. I could never be happy now, never, save in continuing to love you. Life to me would be unspeakably hideous without you and your love. Therefore, I say, Luke, that you have no longer any right to keep me at arm's length. You have no right, having once come into my life, having once given substance and vitality to my love, to withdraw yourself away from me. Love, dear, is a bond, a mutual bond, as sacred, as binding as any that are contracted on this earth.
You--when you wrote that letter, when first you spoke to me of love--entered into a bond with me. You have no right to force me to break it.”
The mellow tones of her contralto voice died down in the heavy atmosphere of the room. They echoed and re-echoed in the heart of the man, who was now kneeling before Louisa, as he would before the Madonna, dumb with the intensity of emotion which her simple words, the sublime selflessness of her sacrifice had brought to an almost maddening pitch. She stood there near him, so devoted, so n.o.ble, and so pure, do you wonder or will you smile, when you see him with fair, young head bowed to the ground pressing his lips on the point of her shoe?
”Luke! don't,” she cried in pa.s.sionate sympathy.
She understood him so well, you see!
”Kiss your feet, dear?” he asked. ”I would lie down in the dust for your dear feet to walk over me. I only wonder why G.o.d should love me so that he gave you for this one beautiful moment to me. Lou, my dearest saint, I cannot accept your sacrifice. Dear heart! dear, dear heart! do try and believe me, when I say that I cannot accept it. As for imagining that I don't understand it and appreciate it, why as soon think that to-morrow's sun will never rise. I wors.h.i.+p you, my saint! and I wors.h.i.+p your love--the purest, most tender sentiment that ever glorified this ugly world. But its sacrifice I cannot accept. I cannot. I would sooner do that most cowardly of all deeds, end my life here and now, than be tempted for one single instant into the cowardice of accepting it. But the memory of it, dear, that I will take with me. Do not think of me in future as being unhappy. No man can be unhappy whose heart is fed on such a memory!”
He had her two hands imprisoned in his, the scent of sweet peas floating gently to his nostrils. As he buried his lips in their fragrant soft palms he was entirely happy. The world had floated away from him. He was in a land of magic with her; in a land where the air was filled with the fragrance of sweet peas, a land of phantasmagoria, the land of Fata Morgana, which none can enter save those who love.
Time sped on, and both had forgotten the world. The fire crackled in the hearth, the clock alone recorded the pa.s.sing of time. The noise of the great city--so cruel to those who suffer--came but as faint echo through the closely drawn curtains.
There was a discreet knock at the door, and as no reply came from within, it was repeated more insistently.
Luke jumped to his feet, and Louisa retreated into the shadow.
”Come in!” said Luke.
The door was opened, quite softly from outside, and the well-drilled servant said:
”Two gentlemen to see you, sir.”
”Where are they, Mary?” he asked.
”In the hall, sir.”
”Did they give their names?”
”No, sir.”
”Where's Miss Edie, Mary?”
”In the drawing room, sir, with Colonel Harris.”
”Very well. Then show the two gentlemen into the dining-room. I'll come in a moment.”
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