Part 25 (1/2)
The kiss lasted more than fifteen years.
Not even frogs can manage that.
The Fool drew back, his eyes glazed, his expression one of puzzlement.
”Did you feel the world move?” he said.
Magrat peered over his shoulder at the forest.
”I think she's done it,” she said.
”Done what?”
Magrat hesitated. ”Oh. Nothing. Nothing much, really.”
”Shall we have another try? I don't think we got it quite right that time.”
Magrat nodded.
This time it lasted only fifteen seconds. It seemed longer.
A tremor ran through the castle, shaking the breakfast tray from which the Duke Felmet, much to his relief, was eating porridge that wasn't too salty.
It was felt by the ghosts that now filled Nanny Ogg's cottage like a rugby team in a telephone box.
It spread to every henhouse in the kingdom, and a number of hands relaxed their grip. And thirty-two purple-faced c.o.c.kerels took a deep breath and crowed like maniacs, but they were too late, too late...
”I still reckon you were up to something,” said Granny Weatherwax.
”Have another cup of tea,” said Nanny pleasantly.
”You won't go and put any drink in it, will you,” Granny said flatly. ”It was the drink what did it last night. I would never have put myself forward like that. It's shameful.”
”Black Aliss never done anything like it,” said Nanny, encouragingly. ”I mean, it was a hundred years, all right, but it was only one castle she moved. I reckon anyone could do a castle.”
Granny's frown puckered at the edge.
”And she let all weeds grow over it,” she observed primly.
”Right enough.”
”Very well done,” said King Verence, eagerly. ”We all thought it was superb. Being in the ethereal plane, of course, we were in a position to observe closely.”
”Very good, your graciousness,” said Nanny Ogg. She turned and observed the crowding ghosts behind him, who hadn't been granted the privilege of sitting at, or partly through, the kitchen table.
”But you lot can b.u.g.g.e.r off back to the outhouse,” she said. ”The cheek! Except the kiddies, they can stay,” she added. ”Poor little mites.”
”I am afraid it feels so good to be out of the castle,” said the king.
Granny Weatherwax yawned.
”Anyway,” she said, ”we've got to find the boy now. That's the next step.”
”We shall look for him directly after lunch.”
”Lunch?”
”It's chicken,” said Nanny. ”And you're tired. Besides, making a decent search will take a long time.”
”He'll be in Ankh-Morpork,” said Granny. ”Mark my words. Everyone ends up there. We'll start with Ankh-Morpork. You don't have to search for people when destiny is involved, you just wait for them in Ankh-Morpork.”
Nanny brightened up. ”Our Karen got married to an innkeeper from there,” she said. ”I haven't seen the baby yet. We could get free board and everything.”
”We needn't actually go. The whole point is that he should come here here. There's something about that city,” said Granny. ”It's like a drain.”
”It's five hundred miles away!” said Magrat. ”You'll be away for ages!”
”I can't help it,” said the Fool. ”The duke's given me special instructions. He trusts me.”
”Huh! To hire more soldiers, I expect?”
”No. Nothing like that. Not as bad as that.” The Fool hesitated. He'd introduced Felmet to the world of words. Surely that was better than hitting people with swords? Wouldn't that buy time? Wouldn't it be best for everybody, in the circ.u.mstances?
”But you don't have to go! You don't want want to go!” to go!”
”That doesn't have much to do with it. I promised to be loyal to him-”
”Yes, yes, until you're dead. But you don't even believe believe that! You were telling me how much you hated the whole Guild and everything!” that! You were telling me how much you hated the whole Guild and everything!”
”Well, yes. But I still have to do it. I gave my word.”
Magrat came close to stamping her foot, but didn't sink so low.
”Just when we were getting to know one another!” she shouted. ”You're pathetic!”
The Fool's eyes narrowed. ”I'd only be pathetic if I broke my word,” he said. ”But I may be incredibly ill-advized. I'm sorry. I'll be back in a few weeks, anyway.”
”Don't you understand I'm asking you not to listen to him?”
”I said I'm sorry. I couldn't see you again before I go, could I?”