Part 30 (2/2)

Verdant Green only read by spasmodic fits; but, as he was very fairly up in his subjects - thanks to Charles Larkyns and the Rector - and as the Little-go was not such a very formidable affair, or demanded a scholar of first-rate calibre, the only terrors that the examination could bring him were those which were begotten of nervousness. At length the lists were out; and our hero read among the names of candidates, that of

”GREEN, ~Verdant, e Coll. AEn. Fac.~”

There is a peculiar sensation on first seeing your name in print.

Instances are on record where people have taken a world of trouble merely that they may have the pleasure of perusing their names ”among the fas.h.i.+onables present” at the Countess of So-and-so's evening-reception; and cases are not wanting where young ladies and gentlemen have expended no small amount of pocket-money in purchasing copies of ~The Times~ (no reduction, too, being made on taking a quant.i.ty!) in order that their sympathizing friends might have the pride of seeing their names as coming out at drawing-rooms and ~levees~. When a young M.P. has stammered out his ~coup-d'essai~ in the House, he views, with mingled emotions, his name given to the world, for the first time, in capital letters. When young authors and artists first see their names in print, is it not a pleasure to them? When Ensign Dash sees himself gazetted, does he not look on his name with a peculiar sensation, and forthwith send an impression of the paper to Master Jones, who was flogged with him last week for stealing apples? When Mr. Smith is called to the Bar, and Mr.

Robinson can dub himself M.R.C.S., do they not behold their names in print with feelings of rapture? And when Miss Brown has been to her first ball, does she not anxiously await the coming of the next county newspaper, in order to have the happiness of reading her name there?

But, different to these are the sensations that attend the seeing your name first in print in a College examination-list. They are, probably, somewhat similar to the sensations you would feel on seeing your name in a death-warrant. Your blood runs hot, then cold, then hot again; your pulse goes at

[216 ADVENTURES OF MR. VERDANT GREEN]

fever pace; the throbbing arteries of your brow almost jerk your cap off. You know that the worst is come, - that the law of the Dons, which altereth not, has fixed your name there, and that there is no escape. The courage of despair then takes possession of your soul, and nerves you for the worst. You join the crowd of nervous fellow-sufferers who are thronging round the b.u.t.tery-door to examine the list, and you begin with them calmly to parcel out the names by sixes and eights, <vg216.jpg> and then to arrive at an opinion when your day of execution will be. If your name comes at the head of the list, you wish that you were ”YOUNG, ~Carolus, e Coll. Vigorn.~” that you might have a reprieve of your sentence. If your name is at the end of the list, you wish that you were ”ADAMS, ~Edvardus Jacobus, e Coll. Univ.~” that you might go in at once, and be put out of your misery. If your name is in the middle of the list, you wish that it were elsewhere: and then you wish that it were out of the list altogether.

Through these varying shades of emotion did Mr. Verdant Green pa.s.s, until at length they were all lost in the deeper gloom of actual entrance into the schools. When once there, his fright soon pa.s.sed away. Rea.s.sured by the kindly voice of the examiner, telling him to read over his Greek before construing it, our hero recovered his equanimity, and got through his ~viva voce~ with flying colours; and, on glancing over his paper-work, soon saw that the questions were within his scope, and that he could answer most of them. Without hazarding his success by making ”bad shots,” he contented himself by answering those questions only on which he felt sure; and, when his examination was over, he left the schools with a

[AN OXFORD FRESHMAN 217]

pretty safe conviction that he was safe, ”and was well through his smalls.”

He could not but help, however, feeling some anxiety on the subject, until he was relieved from all further fears, by the arrival of Messrs. Fosbrooke, Smalls, and Blades, with a slip of paper (not unlike those which Mr. Levi, the sheriff's officer, makes use of), on which was written and printed as follows:-

”GREEN, VERDANT, E COLL. AEN. FAC.

Quaestionibus Magistrorum Scholarum in Parviso pro forma respondit.

{GULIELMUS SMITH, Ita testamur, { {ROBERTUS JONES.

~Junii~ 7, 18--.”

Alas for Mr. Bouncer! Though he had put in practice all the ingenious plans which were without a doubt to ensure his success; and though he had worked his cribs with consummate coolness, and had not been discovered; yet, nevertheless, his friends came to him empty-handed.

The infatuated little gentleman had either trusted too much to his own astuteness, or else he had over-reached himself, and had used his card-knowledge in wrong places; or, perhaps, the examiners may have suspected his deeds from the nature of his papers, and may have refused to pa.s.s him. But whatever might be the cause, the little gentleman had to defer taking his degree for some months at least.

In a word - and a dreadful word it is to all undergraduates - Mr.

Bouncer was PLUCKED! He bore his unexpected reverse of fortune very philosophically, and professed to regret it only for ”the Mum's”

sake; but he seemed to feel that the Dons of his college would look shy upon him, and he expressed his opinion that it would be better for him to migrate to the Tavern.*

But, while Mr. Bouncer was thus deservedly punished for his idleness and duplicity, Charles Larkyns was rewarded for all his toil. He did even better than he had expected: for, not only did his name appear in the second cla.s.s, but the following extra news concerning him was published in the daily papers, under the very appropriate heading of ”University ~Intelligence~.”

”OXFORD, June 9. -The Chancellor's prizes have been awarded as follows:-

”Latin Essay, Charles Larkyns, Commoner of Brazenface. The Newdigate Prize for English Verse was also awarded to the same gentleman.”

His writing for the prize poem had been a secret. He had conceived the idea of doing so when the subject had been given out in the previous ”long:” he had worked at the subject

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