Part 10 (1/2)

[AN OXFORD FRESHMAN 75]

song, but only appreciates the chorus)~ - ”That'll do, old feller! We aint pertickler,-(~rushes with great deliberation and noise to the chorus~) ”That you lo-oved me sti-ill the sa-ha-hame - chorus, gentlemen!”

~Omnes (in various keys and time)~. ”That you lo-oved me sti-ill the same.”

~Mr. Bouncer (to Mr. Green, alluding remotely to the opera)~. ”Now my Bohemian gal, can't you come out to-night? Spit us out a yard or two more, Giglamps.”

~Mr. Verdant Green (who has again taken the opportunity to clear his throat)~. ”I dreamt that I dwe-elt in mar-arble- no! I beg pardon!

sang that (~desperately~) - that sui-uitors sou-ught my hand, that knights on their (~hic~) ben-ended kne-e-ee - had (~hic~) riches too gre-eat to” - (~Mr. Verdant Green smiles benignantly upon the company~) - ”Don't rec'lect anymo.”

~Mr. Bouncer (who is not to be defrauded of the chorus)~. ”Chorus, gentlemen! - That you'll lo-ove me sti-ill the sa-a-hame!”

~Omnes (ad libitum)~. ”That you'll lo-ove me sti-ill the same!”

Though our hero had ceased to sing, he was still continuing to clear his throat by the aid of the milk-punch, and was again industriously sucking his cigar, which he had not yet succeeded in getting half through, although he had re-lighted it about twenty times. All this was observed by the watchful eyes of Mr. Bouncer, who, whispering to his neighbour, and bestowing a distributive wink on the company generally, rose and made the following remarks:-

”Mr. Smalls, and gents all: I don't often get on my pins to trouble you with a neat and appropriate speech; but on an occasion like the present, when we are honoured with the presence of a party who has just delighted us with what I may call a flood of harmony (~hear, hear~), - and has pitched it so uncommon strong in the vocal line, as to considerably take the s.h.i.+ne out of the woodp.e.c.k.e.r-tapping, that we've read of in the pages of history (~hear, hear: ”Go it again, Bouncer!”~), - when, gentlemen, I see before me this old original Little Wobbler, - need I say that I allude to Mr. Verdant Green? - (~vociferous cheers~)- I feel it a sort of, what you call a privilege, d'ye see, to stand on my pins, and propose that respected party's jolly good health (~renewed cheers~). Mr. Verdant Green, gentlemen, has but lately come among us, and is, in point of fact, what you call a freshman; but, gentlemen, we've already seen enough of him to feel aware that - that Brazenface has gained an acquisition, which - which - (~cries of ”Tally-ho! Yoicks! Hark forrud!”~) Exactly so, gentlemen: so, as I see you are all anxious to do honour to our freshman, I beg, without further preface, to give you the health of Mr. Verdant Green! With all the honours. Chorus, gents!

[76 ADVENTURES OF MR. VERDANT GREEN]

”For he's a jolly good fellow!

For he's a jolly good fellow!!

For he's a jolly good f-e-e-ell-ow!!!

Which n.o.body can deny!”

This chorus was taken up and prolonged in the most indefinite manner; little Mr. Bouncer fairly revelling in it, and only regretting that he had not his post-horn with him to further contribute to the harmony of the evening. It seemed to be a great art in the singers of the chorus to dwell as long as possible on the third repet.i.tion of the word ”fellow,” and in the most defiant manner to pounce down on the bold affirmation by which it is followed; and then to lyrically proclaim that, not only was it a way they had in the Varsity to drive dull care away, but that the same practice was also pursued in the army and navy for the attainment of a similar end.

When the chorus had been sung over three or four times, and Mr.

Verdant Green's name had been proclaimed with equal noise, that gentleman rose (with great difficulty), to return thanks. He was understood to speak as follows: <vg076.jpg>

”Genelum anladies (~cheers~), - I meangenelum. (~”That's about the ticket, old feller!” from Mr. Bouncer.~) Customd syam plic speakn, I - I -(~hear, hear~) - feel bliged drinkmyel. I'm fresman, genelum, and prowt.i.tle (~loud cheers~). Myfren Misserboucer, fallowme callm myfren! (~”In course, Giglamps, you do me proud, old feller.”~) Myfren Misserboucer seszime fresman - prow t.i.tle, sureyou (~hear, hear~). Genelmun, werall jolgoodfles, anwe wogohotillmorrin! (~”We won't, we won't! not a bit of it!”~) Gelmul, I'm fresmal, an namesgreel, gelmul (~cheers~). Fanyul dousmewor, herescardinpock'lltellm! Misser Verdalgreel, Braseface, Oxul fresmal, anprowt.i.tle! (~Great cheering and rattling of gla.s.ses, during which Mr. Verdant Green's coat-tails are made the receptacles for empty bottles, lobsters' claws, and other miscellaneous articles.~) Misserboucer said was fresmal. If Misserboucer

[AN OXFORD FRESHMAN 77]

wantsultme (~”No, no!”~), herescardinpocklltellm namesverdalgreel, Braseface! Not shameofitgelmul! prowt.i.tle! (~Great applause.~) I doewaltilsul Misserboucer! thenwhysee sultme? thaswaw Iwaltknow!

(~Loud cheers, and roars of laughter, in which Mr. Verdant Green suddenly joins to the best of his ability.~) I'm anoxful fresmal, gelmul, 'fmyfrel Misserboucer loumecallimso. (~Cheers and laughter, in which Mr. Verdant Green feebly joins.~) Anweerall jolgoodfles, anwe wogohotilmorril, an I'm fresmal, gelmul, anfanyul dowsmewor - an I - doefeel quiwell!”

This was the termination of Mr. Verdant Green's speech, for after making a few unintelligible sounds, his knees suddenly gave way, and with a benevolent smile he disappeared beneath the table.

Half an hour afterwards two gentlemen might have been seen, bearing with staggering steps across the moonlit quad the <vg077.jpg> huddled form of a third gentleman, who was clothed in full evening dress, and appeared incapable of taking care of himself. The two first gentlemen set down their burden under an open doorway, painted over with a large _4_; and then, by pulling and pus.h.i.+ng, a.s.sisted it to guide its steps up a narrow and intricate staircase, until they had gained the third floor, and stood before a door, over which the moonlight revealed, in newly-painted white letters, the name of ”MR.

VERDANT GREEN.”

”Well, old feller,” said the first gentleman, ”how do you feel now, after 'Sich a getting up stairs'?”

”Feel much berrer now,” said their late burden; ”feel quite-comfurble!