Part 20 (1/2)
CHAPTER XII.
Sat.u.r.day's post brought a letter, and a comfortable one. All Thursday Mrs. Merrifield had been in so doubtful a state, that her husband could not bear to write, lest he should fill the children with false hopes, or alarm them still more; but she had had a good night, was stronger on Friday, and when the post went out, the doctors had just ventured to say they believed she would recover favourably. The letter was finished off in a great hurry; but Captain Merrifield did not forget to thank his little Susan warmly for her poor scrambling letter, and say he knew all she meant by it, bidding her give Miss Fosbrook his hearty thanks for forwarding it, and for telling him the children were all behaving well, and feeling properly. His love to them all; they must try to deserve the great mercy that had been granted to them.
To the children, this was almost as good as saying that their mother was well again; but there was too much awe about them for their joy to show itself noisily. Susan ran away to her own room, and Bessie followed her; and Sam said no word, only Miss Fosbrook remarked that he did not eat two mouthfuls of breakfast. She would not take any notice; she knew his heart was full; and when she looked round on that little flock, and thought of the grievous sorrow scarcely yet averted from them, she could hardly keep the tears from blinding her.
They were all somewhat still and grave, and it was too happy a morning to be broken into by the reproofs that Henry deserved, even more richly than Christabel knew. She had almost forgotten his bad behaviour; and when she remembered something of it, she could not but hope that silence, on such a day as this, might bring it home to him more than rebuke. Yet when breakfast was ever, he was among the loudest of those who, shaking off the strange, awed gravity of deep gladness, went rus.h.i.+ng together into the garden, feeling that they might give way to their spirits again.
Sam shouted and whooped as if he were casting off a burthen, and picking little George up in his arms, tossed him and swung him round in the air in an ecstasy; while John and Annie and David went down on the gra.s.s together, and tumbled and rolled one over the other like three kittens, their legs and arms kicking about, so that it was hard to tell whose property were the black shoes that came wriggling into view.
Susan was quieter. She told Nurse the good news, and then laid hold upon Baby, and carried her off into the pa.s.sage to hug all to herself. She could tell no one but Baby how very happy she was, and how her heart had trembled at her mother's suffering, her father's grief, and at the desolateness that had so nearly come on them. Oh, she was very happy, very thankful; but she could not scream it out like the others, Baby must have it all in kisses.
”Christabel,” said a little voice, when all the others were gone, ”I shall never be pipy again.”
”You must try to fight against it, my dear.”
”Because,” said Elizabeth, coming close up to her, ”when dear Mamma was so ill, it did seem so silly to mind about not having pretty things like Ida, and the boys plaguing, and so on.”
”Yes, my dear; a real trouble makes us ashamed of our little discontents.”
”I said so many times yesterday, and the day before, that I would never mind things again, if only Mamma would get well and come home,”
said the little girl; ”and I never shall.”
”You will not always find it easy not to mind,” said Christabel; ”but if you try hard, you will learn how to keep from showing that you mind.”
”Oh!” said Elizabeth, (and a great mouthful of an oh! it was,) ”those things are grown so silly and little now.”
”You have seen them in their true light for once, my dear. And now that you have so great cause of thankfulness to G.o.d, you feel that your foolish frets and discontents were unthankful.”
”Yes,” said Bessie, her eyes cast down, as they always were when anything of this kind was said to her, as if she did not like to meet the look fixed on her.
”Well then, Bessie, try to make the giving up of these murmurs your thank-offering to G.o.d. Suppose every day when you say your prayers, you were to add something like this--” and she wrote down on a little bit of paper, ”O Thou, who hast raised up my mother from her sickness, teach me to be a thankful and contented child, and to guard my words and thoughts from peevishness.”
”Isn't it too small to pray about?” said Elizabeth.
”Nothing is too small to pray about, my dear. Do you think this little midge is too small for G.o.d to have made it, and given it life, and spread that mother-of-pearl light on its wings? Do you think yourself too small to pray? or your fault too small to pray about?”
Elizabeth cast down her eyes. She did not quite think it was a fault, but she did not say so.
”Bessie, what was the great sin of the Israelites in the wilderness?”
The colour on her cheek showed that she knew.
”They tempted G.o.d by murmurs,” said Christabel. ”They tried His patience by grumbling, when His care and blessings were all round them, and by crying out because all was not just as they liked. Now, dear Bessie, G.o.d has shown you what a real sorrow might be; will it not be tempting Him to go back to complaints over what He has ordained for you?”
”I shall net complain now; I shall not care,” said Elizabeth. But she took the little bit of paper, and Christabel trusted that she would make use of it, knowing that in this lay her hope of cure; for whatever she might think in this first joy of relief, her little troubles were sure to seem quite as unbearable while they were upon her as if she had never feared a great one.
However, nothing remarkable happened; everyone was bright and happy; but still the influence of their past alarm subdued them enough to make them quiet and well-behaved, both on Sat.u.r.day and Sunday; and Miss Fosbrook had never had so little trouble with them.
In consideration of this, and of the agitation and unsettled state that had put the last week out of all common rules, she announced on Monday morning that she would excuse all the fines, and that all the children should have their allowance unbroken. Maybe she was moved to this by the suspicion that these four sixpences and three threepennies would make up the fund to the price of a ”reasonable pig;” and she thought it time that David's perseverance should be rewarded, and room made in his mind for something beyond swine and halfpence.