Part 25 (1/2)

I fall apart, my tears falling heavily as they thud against my cheeks. I curl into a little ball as I let them fall freely. I clutch my side where the knife dug in all the way to the hilt.

Please let this be over soon.

Chapter Fifteen.

In Love and h.e.l.l Tag ”Ash was quiet tonight,” I murmur to Wren as we stand out on the back deck and let the breeze wash over us.

Though my property is still gated, you have a perfect view of the ocean.

”Yeah, I noticed that. She's still not eating very much. She barely touched her food, and we were almost done eating by the time she got in there.”

”I know. Should I say something?”

”I think you should. Bity says you're the only one who seems to bring out her vulnerability. It's likely she'd confide in you. She definitely needs to talk to someone after the h.e.l.l she's been through.”

I look through the window as Damon sits beside Ash, and she forces another smile, masking her truths behind that glorious grin. I wish I knew what to say to make it all better for her.

As.h.i.+ara ”You were quiet, pretty girl. Want to share?” Damon asks kindly.

He looks completely different than the scruffy man he was when he arrived. His dark shadow has been shaved clean. His clothes are pressed, clean, and fit him perfectly. He almost looks like Tag now, just older.

”I'm fine, just tired. It's been a long couple of weeks, as you've read in the tabloids,” I grumble, my eyes pointing to the mess of magazines he brought in.

”Sorry, I didn't know you hadn't seen them.”

”It's fine. So how long are you staying?” I ask to change the subject.

”I originally planned on leaving tonight, but Tag invited me to stay. I think I'll take him up on it. How do you feel about that?”

The way he says that is odd, but then again, I'm very tired. I'm both mentally and physically drained.

”I think it's a good idea. I'm sure Tag would love the chance to spend some time with you.”

”And what about you, dear? Would you like to spend time with me?”

”Um, I don't see why not. Right now though, I need to get Trip to bed.”

The sliding gla.s.s door to the outside deck opens, and Tag steps in just as I stand up.

”Going to bed?” he asks as he walks toward me.

”Yeah. Trip is out, and I'm pretty beat. Do you want him in my room or your room tonight?”

He tilts his head as though I've just said something wrong.

”You're not sleeping with me?”

As much as I want to say no, I want to say yes just as badly. This is so twisted and confusing as h.e.l.l.

”I don't really know if-”

”I'm sure Damon would prefer a room with a view, and yours is the last one. If you stay the night with me and Trip, then he can wake up with the ocean in his room.”

I force an uneasy smile, and then I nod.

”Then I guess you've got a roommate again.”

Tag Roommate?

Is that how she views herself? Is that my fault or is that what she feels?

d.a.m.n I'm confused.

Damon stands, and then he heads off toward Ash's room to make himself comfortable, as Erica, Bity, and Shannon walk in.

”We're going to take a walk on the beach. You guys feel like going? We can bring security,” Shannon chirps.

I look to Ash, hoping she'll say yes. I'd love to hold her to me as we carry our son down the beach.

”I'm tired, but maybe tomorrow. You guys are staying, right?” she asks.

”Yeah, we're here for the duration. No more leaving you alone,” Bity quickly adds.

”What about you, Tag? You in for a beach stroll?”

I'd like to get out just to clear my head for a minute. Ash's body in those short little shorts and tight top is killing me. I haven't been able to keep my d.a.m.n hands off her all day. I thought about saying to h.e.l.l with it, and f.u.c.king her despite the pills, but I can't.

As soon as her head isn't clouded by anything, she's mine.

”Sure,” I murmur in a sighing tone, not wanting to go and leave her, but not wanting to stay and not touch her.

She almost frowns, but she swishes out of the room with Trip in her arms. I watch as my bedroom door closes, and I debate going on to bed with her. With the raging hard-on I've had most of the day, that would probably be a bad idea.

I need some fresh air.

As.h.i.+ara I should be able to sleep. I'm exhausted, and I cried so much earlier that I almost pa.s.sed out. Why can't I sleep?

With an irritated huff, I finally give up. They've been gone for a while, and I'm starting to wish I had just gone with them. I would have liked walking with Tag, but not being able to be with him is getting more painful by the day.

Mmm. Pie.

Erica brought a pie, and I skipped out on desert. Now I want some, and I think that's exactly what I'll go get.