Part 17 (2/2)
I just want to hold her and tell her everything is going to be okay. I had to tell her I didn't think Melanie's house was fortified enough to keep her safe just to bring her home with me.
”You haven't seen the half of it.”
She forces a smile, and I look away from the rearview mirror as we pull up in front of the house. Seven men rush out to investigate the premises as I open the back door and lift the car-seat.
”I can get him,” she murmurs while strapping the diaper bag on.
”You look like you can barely hold yourself up, let alone a car-seat that weighs at least thirty pounds. Has this creep stressed you out so much that you can't eat? Why didn't you tell me he was bothering you again? I could have had Gary and Leo come back to your place.”
”He hasn't bothered me in a while. Today was the first time he's done anything since before the benefit.”
”Then why have you lost so much d.a.m.n weight?” I scold.
She looks away, her eyes refusing to meet mine.
”I've just been dealing with a lot.”
My eyes soften as I push my hand against the small of her back to lead her inside. I'm sure it's not easy to be a single mother.
Her mouth falls open as she stares around at the lavish surroundings no other girl has ever seen - well, no other girl I've been with, rather. Melanie has seen my place, but she doesn't count.
”Wow. I see now why you don't take girls home. They might not want to leave,” she gushes.
That makes me almost smile, but my nerves rattle, too.
”Thanks,” I say with an uneasy tone as I lead her down to the living area.
Even too skinny, she's still the most captivating girl I've ever known.
As.h.i.+ara I almost cry when I see the play pin, crib, and various other things set up. Not to mention, he has baby proofed the house. Trip can't crawl yet, so he went overboard with the baby gates placed in front of the fireplace and guards over the sockets. It's sweet though.
”You weren't kidding when you said you were prepared. h.e.l.l, your house is better equipped for a child than anything I've ever seen.”
He laughs lightly, and then he shrugs.
”I don't know how long it'll take to find this guy, and you're staying here until we do. So, for now, just get used to calling this home. Don't feel uncomfortable, please. You can go anywhere you want to in the house, and I'll give you the security codes.”
Home with Tag.
It sounds so good. It almost feels like we're the family he doesn't know we are. I smile as he unfastens Trip and pulls him into his arms. He grins as Trip's lips bubble, and tears fall free from my eyes upon witnessing the moment I've only dreamed about - Tag holding his son.
”He's cute. He's a hard sleeper, too,” he says while sitting down with him in his arms.
”You look like you know what you're doing. I was an awkward mess in the hospital when I had him. Sadly enough, he's the first baby I've ever held.”
Tag smiles, and then he looks up at me.
”I go to the children's hospital every year at Christmas to pa.s.s out gifts to the kids who wouldn't get anything otherwise. Most of their families are broke from the outrageous prices they have to pay for cancer treatments. In return, I usually get to hold a baby or two.”
More tears water up in my eyes. How can this incredible man say he isn't father material? He's more father material than most father's I've met. Do I just tell him? Can I tell him? He could be a good dad.
But would he want to be? I couldn't bear Trip feeling unwanted or unloved.
”Um, can I use your bathroom?” I ask while fighting off the floodgates.
”Don't ask to use anything, please. I told you - my house is your house. The closest one is in your room - through the double doors over there.”
My room?
h.e.l.l. I don't know why, but I a.s.sumed he would only have one room, and I was secretly hoping I'd be sharing a bed with him.
I nod, and then I head through the doors quickly before I fall apart. As it all catches up to me, I slide down the wall and sob silently in the dark.
Tag Staring down at Trip, I think of all the times I've almost begged Ash to be with me. Now, I want it even more. I want to raise her son like he's my own, and I want to love her. I still don't know if I'm capable, but considering I've spent almost a year without f.u.c.king anyone but her, I'm pretty sure I'm through with my days of womanizing.
I can't even think of another woman like that, and that can only mean I'm better than my dad. Maybe I can be that guy she needs after all.
She walks out, and I can tell she's been crying. I'm sure the day has overwhelmed her. Being shot at has to be pretty f.u.c.king terrifying. When I find this b.a.s.t.a.r.d, he'll pray I shoot him. The things I plan to do might send me to prison for a while.
”You hungry?” I ask, and she shakes her head.
I frown as I stare at her body withering away.
”You need to eat,” I mutter before glancing toward the kitchen. ”Betty,” I call, and the short, black-haired lady bobs in quickly with a ready-to-please smile. ”Will you get Ms. Branderwood something to eat, please?”
She nods vehemently, and then she disappears back into the kitchen. I pick up the remote beside me while cradling Trip a little closer to my body, and I turn on all the lights of the house to cast a better glow.
”Better?” I ask as Ash sits down in the chair across from me.
”Yeah.”
”He can sleep in my room, if you want. I'm sure you're exhausted.”
Her eyes water more, and I want to ask her to sleep in my room, too. I'd love to feel her body wrapped around mine, but it wouldn't be right to do to her right now. She's too vulnerable.
”That's okay. He sleeps pretty good, so he can just stay with me.”
”Can I ask where his father is and why he isn't here checking on his son after a shot that could have killed either of you?”
She takes a deep breath, as though she's trying not to fall apart. I shouldn't be pressing this, but I have to. That a.s.shole should show some f.u.c.king concern for his son and the mother of his son.
”He's... it's just... well, he isn't part of Trip's life. He's sort of... well, we didn't both have to change the way we lived for one mistake. I love Trip. To me, he's not a mistake anymore. Now he's real. Now he's the best thing in my life, but his dad, well, his dad isn't ready to be a dad - his words, not mine.”
<script>