Part 43 (1/2)
”Pauline...?”
And she gave a gentle, smiling nod.
Yes, of course, she understood now, told him that Pauline was well.
Yes, yes, he remembered: Mamma, the children, Pauline.... They were as ghosts in his empty memory, looming up and making him ask questions of the women around him. But, apart from that, his memory was one vast emptiness, like an empty universe, now that the beast had vanished into s.p.a.ce ... into nothingness ... into nothingness....
He had no marrow left: the beast would not eat him up any more. There was no centipede rooting at his carcase now. Lord, Lord, how done he felt, how utterly done for!...
He now recognized his doctor:
”Ah, is that you, Alsma?”
”Well, Van Lowe, do you recognize me?”
”Yes, yes.... Didn't I recognize you before?”
”No ... once or twice you didn't know who I was.... Well, you'll soon be all right again now. You're getting better every day....”
”Yes, yes ... but....”
”What?”
”I feel very queer ... d.a.m.ned queer....”
”Yes, you're a bit weak still....”
”A bit weak?...”
He gave a grin. He felt his arm, thought it odd that he couldn't find his biceps:
”Where's the thing got to?” he asked. ”Is it gone?...”
”No, you'll get your strength back all right.... It doesn't take long, once you're well again.”
”Oh, it doesn't take long?”
”No, you'd be surprised....”
”I say, Alsma, can't I see my children ... just for once?...”
”No, it would tire you a bit.... Later on, later on....”
”I say, do you know what's so rotten? I don't know ... all sorts of things ... whether I've been dreaming ... or not....”
”Don't worry about it. That'll all come right ... bit by bit, bit by bit....”
”A lake full of white-faced mermaids: that's rot, eh?... An express-train: was I away, shortly before my illness? I wasn't, was I?... The body ... of a girl: did I see that?... A snake-thing, a great wriggling snake-thing: yes, that snake-thing was there all right; I fought the thing.... I believe it was all rot ... except the great snake-thing, which licked me up ... with its tongue....”