Part 39 (1/2)

'nobody wants to, pa,' rejoined his daughter

'nobody would if they did want to,' said Mr Snevellicci 'I am not ashamed of myself, Snevellicci is my name; I'm to be found in Broad Court, Bow Street, when I'm in town If I'e-door Dae-door I suppose Most ar shop round the corner I've been mentioned in the newspapers before now, haven't I? Talk! I'll tell you what; if I found out that any hter, I wouldn't talk I'd astonish hi, Mr Snevellicci struck the palm of his left hand three smart bloith his clenched fist; pulled a phantoer, and sed another glassful at a draught 'That's my way,' repeated Mr Snevellicci

Most public characters have their failings; and the truth is that Mr Snevellicci was a little addicted to drinking; or, if the whole truth must be told, that he was scarcely ever sober He knew in his cups three distinct stages of intoxication,-the dignified-the quarrelsoot beyond the dignified; in private circles he went through all three, passing from one to another with a rapidity of transition often rather perplexing to those who had not the honour of his acquaintance

Thus Mr Snevellicci had no sooner sed another glassful than he s exhibited synacity, and proposed 'The ladies! Bless their hearts!' in a most vivaciousround the table, 'I love 'em, every one'

'Not every one,' reasoned Mr Lillyvick, mildly

'Yes, every one,' repeated Mr Snevellicci

'That would include the married ladies, you know,' said Mr Lillyvick

'I love them too, sir,' said Mr Snevellicci

The collector looked into the surrounding faces with an aspect of grave astonish to say, 'This is a nice man!' and appeared a little surprised that Mrs Lillyvick's nation

'One good turn deserves another,' said Mr Snevellicci 'I love them and they love ard and defiance of all ations, what did Mr Snevellicci do? He winked-winked openly and undisguisedly; winked with his right eye-upon Henrietta Lillyvick!

The collector fell back in his chair in the intensity of his astonishment If anybody had winked at her as Henrietta Petowker, it would have been indecorous in the last degree; but as Mrs Lillyvick! While he thought of it in a cold perspiration, and wondered whether it was possible that he could be drea to Mrs Lillyvick in dumb show, actually blew her a kiss! Mr Lillyvick left his chair, walked straight up to the other end of the table, and fell upon him-literally fell upon hiht, and consequently when he fell upon Mr Snevellicci, Mr Snevellicci fell under the table Mr Lillyvick followed him, and the ladies screamed

'What is theunder the table, dragging up the collector byhim, all doubled up, into a chair, as if he had been a stuffed figure 'What do you mean to do? What do you want to do? What is the matter with you?'

While Nicholas raised up the collector, Smike had perforarded his late adversary in tipsy amaze to his astonished wife, 'here is purity and elegance coed-violated, sir!'

'Lor, what nonsense he talks!' exclai look of Nicholas 'nobody has said anything to me'

'Said, Henrietta!' cried the collector 'Didn't I see hi himself to utter the word, but he counterfeited the motion of the eye

'Well!' cried Mrs Lillyvick 'Do you suppose nobody is ever to look atto be married indeed, if that was law!'

'You didn't mind it?' cried the collector

'Mind it!' repeated Mrs Lillyvick conte everybody's pardon, that you ought'

'Pardon, my dear?' said the dismayed collector

'Yes, and mine first,' replied Mrs Lillyvick 'Do you suppose I ain't the best judge of what's proper and what's improper?'

'To be sure,' cried all the ladies 'Do you suppose WE shouldn't be the first to speak, if there was anything that ought to be taken notice of?'

'Do you suppose THEY don't know, sir?' said Miss Snevellicci's papa, pulling up his collar, andonly withheld by considerations of age With which Miss Snevellicci's papa looked steadily and sternly at Mr Lillyvick for so deliberately fro with Mrs Lillyvick

The unhappy collector looked piteously at his wife, as if to see whether there was any one trait of Miss Petowker left in Mrs Lillyvick, and finding too surely that there was not, begged pardon of all the coreat humility, and sat down such a crest-fallen, dispirited, disenchanted e, he was quite an object of coreatly exalted by this triumph, and incontestable proof of his popularity with the fair sex, quickly grew convivial, not to say uproarious; volunteeringthe social circle bethiles with recollections of divers splendid women who had been supposed to entertain a passion for hi occasion to remark at the same time that if he had been a littleat that moment in his chariot-and-four These res in the breast of Mrs Snevellicci, as sufficiently occupied in descanting to Nicholas upon the hter Nor was the young lady herself at all behind-hand in displaying her choicest allurehtened as they were by the artifices of Miss Ledrook, had no effect whatever in increasing the attentions of Nicholas, ith the precedent of Miss Squeers still fresh in his memory, steadily resisted every fascination, and placed so strict a guard upon his behaviour that when he had taken his leave the ladies were unani him quite a monster of insensibility

Next day the posters appeared in due course, and the public were informed, in all the colours of the rainbow, and in letters afflicted with every possible variation of spinal defor his last appearance that evening, and how that an early application for places was requested, in consequence of the extraordinary overflow attendant on his perfor a re since established beyond dispute, that it is a hopeless endeavour to attract people to a theatre unless they can be first brought to believe that they will never get into it

Nicholas was soht, to account for the unusual perturbation and excitement visible in the countenances of all the co in doubt as to the cause, for before he couldit Mr Cruitated tone of voice, inforer in the boxes

'It's the pheno Nicholas to the little hole in the curtain that he er 'I have not the smallest doubt it's the fareat-coat and no shi+rt-collar She shall have ten pound a week, Johnson; she shall not appear on the London boards for a farthing less They shan't engage her either, unless they engage Mrs Crummles too-twenty pound a week for the pair; or I'll tell you what, I'll throw in myself and the two boys, and they shall have the family for thirty I can't say fairer than that They o without the others That's the way some of the London people do, and it always answers Thirty pound a week-it's too cheap, Johnson It's dirt cheap'

Nicholas replied, that it certainly was; and Mr Vincent Crue pinches of snuff to cos, hurried away to tell Mrs Crummles that he had quite settled the only terms that could be accepted, and had resolved not to abate one single farthing

When everybody was dressed and the curtain went up, the exciteer increased a thousand-fold Everybody happened to know that the London er had come down specially to witness his or her own performance, and all were in a flutter of anxiety and expectation Some of those ere not on in the first scene, hurried to the wings, and there stretched their necks to have a peep at him; others stole up into the two little private boxes over the stage-doors, and froer Once the London er was seen to s to catch a blue-bottle, while Mrs Cruood,his fist at the comic countryman when he caht'

In the sae beheld no audience but one individual; everybody played to the London er When Mr Lenville in a sudden burst of passion called the elove, said, 'But I loo for his cue, as is proper in such cases, he kept his eye fixed upon the Londonat her lover, who according to custom stood ready to shake hands with her between the verses, they looked, not at each other, but at the London er Mr Cruuards came in to take the body off after a very hard death, it was seen to open its eyes and glance at the London er was discovered to be asleep, and shortly after that he woke up and went ahereupon all the co that his buffoonery was the sole cause; and Mr Cru tier, and therefore would feel obliged by his looking out for another engagement

All this was the occasion ofupon the subject was one of sincere satisfaction that the great h his part in the two last pieces as briskly as he could, and having been received with unbounded favour and unprecedented applause-so said the bills for next day, which had been printed an hour or two before-he took Smike's ar cas, very inky, very short, very dirty, very s Nicholas to return to London instantly; not to lose an instant; to be there that night if possible

'I will,' said Nicholas 'Heaven knows I have reainstWhat can have happened? Sether, and pay what little debts e-quick, and we shall be in tioing, and will return to you i away to the lodgings of Mr Cruood-will, that he awakened that gentleman, as still in bed, and caused Mr Bulph the pilot to take his 's pipe very nearly out of hisopened, Nicholas ran upstairs without any cere-room on the one-pair front, found that the two Master Cru on their clothes with great rapidity, under the iht, and the next house was on fire

Before he could undeceive thehtcap; and to him Nicholas briefly explained that circumstances had occurred which rendered it necessary for hioodbye,' said Nicholas; 'goodbye, goodbye'

He was half-way downstairs before Mr Cruasp out so about the posters

'I can't help it,' replied Nicholas 'Set whatever I ainst them, or if that will not repay you, say at once ill Quick, quick'

'We'll cry quits about that,' returned Cruht more?'

'Not an hour-not a minute,' replied Nicholas, i to Mrs Cru him down to the door

'I couldn't stop if it were to prolong my life a score of years,' rejoined Nicholas 'Here, take my hand, and with ithere!'