Part 4 (1/2)

I didn't say anything, so there was a silence. The purring of the electric clock sounded like someone clearing his 58 throat, but in a way that never made it any better.

”Why?” I said at last.

”What?” Father Franklin said.

”I'm sorry, but that just doesn't make any sense to me.

Why would G.o.d treat gay and straight people so differently? It's not fair.” ”I know it seems that way. But G.o.d places limits on heteros.e.xual people too.”

”Yes,” I said, ”but if straight people don't agree to those limits, you'll marry them anyway. And most Catholics don't agree with those limits.” I knew this for a fact. I was no fool. Before coming here, I'd done my research.

Father Franklin was back to s.h.i.+fting in his seat. ”Russel, I'm not just making these things up, you know. There are traditions. These things come directly from Scripture.”

”There used to be a tradition to keep slaves,” I said. ”The Church used to say that came from Scripture too, until they decided they were wrong. Maybe you're wrong about this too. Back when the Bible was being written, no one had any idea what h.o.m.os.e.xuality was, just like they had no idea that the earth revolved around the sun.”

Father Franklin held up his hand. ”I'm sorry, Russel, but s.e.x between two men just isn't a part of G.o.d's plan!”

This annoyed me. ”Who said anything about s.e.x?” I said. ”I never told you I was having s.e.x. I never brought up s.e.x at all. You did, twice now. I'm talking about love. And it 59 seems weird to me that the Church would say that two people falling in love is, like, this big, horrible thing, all against G.o.d's plan. I just can't believe G.o.d would demand that all these people be miserable and alone their whole lives. Or that they marry someone they can't ever really love.”

To his credit, Father Franklin just listened. I think he knew I had a point. The air seemed to have cleared a little too. I think the housekeeper had opened a window somewhere.

Father Franklin leaned forward in his chair. ”Russel, I can tell you're very smart. So can I be frank?”

”Yes,” I said. ”Be frank.”

”I know that human s.e.xuality is a little more complicated than the Church sometimes admits in public. When it comes to s.e.x, things aren't always black and white.”

Here we go, I thought. Back to s.e.x again. And they say we gay people are obsessed with it?

”What do you mean?” I asked.

”Well, I wasn't born yesterday.”

I thought, Oh, G.o.d, now I have to hear about Father Franklin's ”gay” phase again!

”Yeah?” I said.

”I know the Church can seem uncompromising,” the priest said. ”And out of touch. But the Church also says that ultimately we have to decide these things for ourselves.

60 That they're a matter of personal conscience.”

”So you're saying that if I disagree with you, that's okay?” ”I'm saying that none of this means there isn't still a place for you in the Catholic Church.”

Okay, so now I was thoroughly confused. What happened to Unchanging Truths? G.o.d's plan? And why hadn't he mentioned this right when I came in? Why did he bring it up only when he realized that I wasn't an intellectual pushover? Were the truths unchanging only for stupid people?

”If the world isn't black and white,” I said, ”why does the Church talk like it is?”

He thought for a second. ”I think some people in the Church think that if we admit we could be wrong about any one thing, then some people will think we're wrong about everything. One of the things that people really like about the Catholic Church is the idea that it's solid. Ageless. Something to cling to in times of change.”

”So your stand on gays is really more of a PR decision?” I said.

Father Franklin looked at me. Then he laughed out loud. This time, I hadn't meant to be telling a joke.

”Father Franklin,” I said, ”now can I be frank with you?”

He looked surprised, like a baby who had just touched a hot lightbulb. ”Of course.”

”The Church teaches things,” I said. ”People like my parents hear those things, and they believe them. And then 61 they freak out when they learn their son is gay. And other people hear those things, and they beat up gay people. Or they vote for politicians who write laws that make us second-cla.s.s citizens. And now you're telling me that the things the Church teaches might not be right after all?”

”What's your point?” ”Actions have consequences, Father. That's the basis for all morality.”

”Ah, yes,” Father Franklin said. ”I see what you mean. Touche.”

I stood up. ”I'm going to be leaving now. Is that okay, Father?”

”Huh? Oh, yes. Of course.” He stood up too. ”You probably don't want to hear this, but the Church could use more people like you. I hope you'll still give us a chance.”

”Well,” I said. ”Let's just say I wouldn't wait by the phone.”

Needless to say, the air outside the building was fresh and clean.

The next day at school, Monday, Min met me in the hallway. ”Hey!” I said.

She asked how it was going with my parents, and I told her. I felt guilty I hadn't kept her up-to-date on everything that was going on with Kevin. She was one of my best 62 friends. And if she called me on my c.r.a.p, well, maybe I needed my c.r.a.p called on right then.

”Here's the thing,” she said. ”I have a confession to make. It was an accident, but I still feel really bad.” ”Yeah?” I said. ”I've got something I want to tell you too.” I would tell her-everything.

But before Min could say anything more, a voice stopped us both dead in our tracks.

”Did you hear?” someone said. ”Kevin Land came out!

He's gay !”

CHAPTER FIVE.

So Kevin Land really had come out of the closet. Wow, I thought, standing in the hallway with Min.

Good for him. 63 Good for him, but bad for me. Because as long as he was in the closet, I didn't have to choose between him and Otto. Now I did. He'd also proven that maybe he wasn't quite as weak as I'd thought. All this was what he'd been impishly grinning about on the movie set on Sat.u.r.day. He knew by coming out, he would change everything.

Suddenly I wasn't so sure I wanted Min calling me on my c.r.a.p.

Otto IMed me that night.

OttoManEmpire: Hey, you! How's it going with your parents?

I told him about my encounter with Father Franklin the day before.

OttoManEmpire: Oh man! I wish I could have heard that! Smuggler: It was oddly satisfying. What's going on with you?

He told me how he and his friends Jan and Will were doing volunteer work at a ”no-kill” animal shelter. It was 64 interesting, but to be honest, I didn't know any of the peo ple he was talking about. So it wasn't that interesting. There was a pause. Neither of us typed anything. It probably wasn't that long of a pause, but it seemed long. I guess it was symbolic or whatever.