Chapter 18 (1/2)
But Xiao Yi was hired by Luzhou to be his personal a.s.sistant, in order to have several days off during New Year, he has to first discuss it over with Luzhou.
Xiao Yi: ”That's right, Brother Zhou, how are you going to celebrate the New Year?”
”Don't know.” Luzhou said: ”Watch TV at home.”
Xiao Yi: ”How you celebrated last year?”
Luzhou: ”In Paris.”
Xiao Yi: ”……”
”Then the year before last?” Xiao Yi asked again.
”I was with Zhang Xinran.” Luzhou said, ”Why? Just spit it out if you have something to say.”
Luzhou just came back from a get-together with his friends, they were sitting in the car and Xiao Yi's eyes fully concentrated on driving the car, he said ”Ah……I was thinking, in a few days I will return home to celebrate New Year, what about you? Do you have any plans?”
Luzhou: ”……”
In a flash, Xiao Yi had a premonition that he would hear Luzhou's roaring.
However Luzhou didn't, but instead, he said: ”You can return back home to celebrate New Year, no need to care about me.”
Xiao Yi was overjoyed, and said: ”When do I have to come back?”
”Oh, you still think of coming back?” Luzhou said sincerely: ”Go home and grow vegetables, little brother, the working people of the motherland needs you.”
Xiao Yi: ”……”
Xiao Yi parked the car in the garage, Luzhou got out and slammed the door and walked away arrogantly.
Xiao Yi carried 15 pairs of shoes from the backseat that Luzhou had bought from Taobao, and moved it into the house, he waited for Luzhou to issue an order, before bringing it all back into the room, but who would have thought Luzhou would said: ”Show me.”
Without any better option Xiao Yi had to tear open the packages, he hoped that Luzhou would feel that these wrappers were bothersome and make him throw all the shoes out directly, this unexpectedly didn't happen though.
Luzhou took a pair of shoes and said: ”44?”
Xiao Yi: ”Eh……”
Xiao Yi wore size forty-three, obviously a little smaller, he had to bite the bullet and put on the sneakers for Luzhou and tie up his shoelaces.
Xiao Yi: ”Is it small?”
Luzhou: ”……”
”Wear it yourself and see? Huh? Put it on.” Luzhou was simply becoming furious because of Xiao Yi.
Xiao Yi put on the other one, walked a few steps, smiled and said, “I'm wearing it just fine! “
The look that Luzhou had was simply wanting Xiao Yi to throw the shoes back into the box to return it, that night Xiao Yi was being chewed out by Luzhou, 15 pairs of shoes with a total of 4,300 yuan, this whole amount would be taken from Xiao Yi's pay. Xiao Yi had to take pictures one by one and upload them on Moment to sell all those shoes off……
(T/N: Moment = a social network function of the app WeChat)
”How about we go somewhere to celebrate New Year, Brother Zhou.” Xiao Yi said.
“Aren’t you going home?” Luzhou said while looking at Xiao Yi holding the iPad and leisurely surf Taobao.
”No, no.” Xiao Yi hurriedly said accompanied with a smile: ”I'm not going home, there are so many people going home around Chinese New Year, I couldn't buy a ticket.”
”Oh?” Luzhou said: ”I'm going on vacation abroad and I'm leaving tomorrow, since you're not going you can stay behind and look after the house.”
Xiao Yi: ”……”
”Turn the page!” Luzhou said.
Xiao Yi turned the page right away while he thought 'Wait until I go back I will book a ticket, I know you want to mess with me'. Luzhou stared at a dress for almost thirty seconds, Xiao Yi said: ”This……you want to buy this?”
”Are you insane!” Luzhou said: ”I'll buy a dress for who to wear! Turn the page.”
Xiao Yi thought 'I can go home, but is Luzhou lying?' He hadn't heard the company mention anything about Luzhou spending his New Year abroad. Also, recently he hadn't heard him say anything about it……
Xiao Yi accompanied Luzhou to surf Taobao, he reported the newest trending gossip on Weibo and found out that the matter regarding Zhang Xinran had already faded, everyone was focusing on the latest news of Li Changzheng. Before she went on vacation Du Mei had said that after the New Year she would organize a propaganda campaign to create gossip to promote Luzhou, she even told Xiao Yi to pay more attention, but recently what was there to hype it?
Luzhou let out a yawn wanting to go to bed, Xiao Yi returned to his room and began to look at tickets, they were all sold out and only 1st cla.s.s cabin seats remained, in order to return home Xiao Yi had to clench his teeth and buy it. After he just bought the ticket, he heard yelling from the room next to him.
”Hey!”
As soon as Xiao Yi went over he saw Luzhou on the bed making a phone call, he said into the phone, “Then I won't go, let’s talk about it next year. “
Xiao Yi: ”???”
Xiao Yi was standing at the entrance, Luzhou said: ”I'm not going abroad, looks like I have bad luck I still have to see your face during New Year, go book the airplane tickets.”
Xiao Yi: ”Book the tickets?”
Luzhou: ”I'll take you out to celebrate New Year! Staying at home for what, you want me to die of suffocation?”
Xiao Yi went back to his room to arrange the trip for him and Luzhou, he was simply going insane as looked at the airplane tickets, there were only 1st cla.s.s cabin seats ah ah ah!——they were more than 3000 yuan! He suddenly thought of something inside his head, he went back to Luzhou in the room next door and asked: ”Brother Zhou, where do you want to go?”
Luzhou: ” Any place is fine.”
As a result Xiao Yi had to rack his brain, the next day he was being honest and said: ”Brother Zhou, the visas won't be made in time, we can only celebrate New Year within the country.”
Luzhou said: ”I want a place that isn't too cold, but it can't be too hot either, it must have a feeling of winter, within the country is fun, but try to find a place that is bustling with noise and excitement and also can't be found by fans, it needs to be peaceful and have the feeling of New Year, it's been a long time since I last experienced a New Year atmosphere, it needs to have a good atmosphere, a beautiful scenery and there needs to be healthy food to eat. The place must not have any tourist groups and in general it must not have many people, the hotel owner should be cordial and can't be too divided, also, in a New Year's celebration there must have family reunion dinner. It's even better if there is a hot spring.”
Xiao Yi: ”……”
Luzhou put forward a bunch of contradictory requests and said, ”The hotel staff must be friendly and the hotel must have many evaluation reviews and most importantly there, must, be, hot, water.”
Xiao Yi braced himself because trying to find such a place was simply even harder than reaching the sky , even Beijing didn't necessarily meet with Luzhou's requirements.
To Lijiang? There would certainly be fans chasing after them like dogs, Xiao Yi was only one person he could forecast that when the moment came surely the army of fans would push him over and then step on his face to get through. If they got a visa right now they could only travel in Southeast Asia, j.a.pan didn't celebrate the Lunar new year, South Korea……was not good. Thailand……also not good, if the Thai people saw Luzhou they would most likely recognize him. Hong kong, Taiwan……All of these places weren't good.
Northeast China was too cold, Sanya was too hot, in Xiao Yi's mind appeared a scene of him holding Luzhou's bag as he followed Luzhou closely while being scolded by him like being poured dog’s blood on.
(T/N: To pour dog’s blood on = torrent of abuse)
There wasn't anything to say about the hot spring, but a place bustling with noise and excitement, without fans, and also needed to have family reunion dinner, how was that even possible ah! And two people eating a family reunion dinner, how was he supposed to eat while looking at Luzhou's stinky face?
'I got a solution!'
”Xiao Yi, Xiao Yi一” the co-ordinator big sister's voice spoke through Wechat: ”At last the film is finalized, the screenwriter still to want to go through the latter part though. During the Lunar New Year we are going to eat at Sanlitun street and then we'll go to a bar afterward, are you coming?”
Xiao Yi: ”Although I really want to go……. Sister An, I already have plans to go on a trip to celebrate New Year.”
”Alright一” the co-ordinator said, ”When you have time, come to the company to hang out with us, your sister will take you out to eat delicious food.”
Xiao Yi burst with joy he thought that after this year was over he must look for them to hang out.
Xiao Yi looked for Luzhou to get his ID, when he took a glimpse at it he almost laughed, Luzhou bellowed and said: ”You! Bring yours out so I can see! Who doesn't have an ugly ID picture……”
Xiao Yi held Luzhou's ID while laughing out loud as he fell on top of the staircase, Luzhou gnashed his teeth as he s.n.a.t.c.hed Xiao Yi's ID. Xiao Yi's ID picture looked very handsome, therefore Luzhou didn't have anything to say.
“Where are we going? Did you find a good place to go?” Luzhou looked down at Xiao Yi down from the stairs.
“I found a good place,” Xiao Yi said, “we can leave tomorrow.”
Luzhou stared at Xiao Yi, seeing that for a long time Xiao Yi still hadn't told him the plan, he threatened: “If it doesn't satisfy my requirements, you at once will……you at once will……”
“Your servant will castrate himself.” Xiao Yi said sincerely.
Luzhou: “Remember it well, when the moment comes, I'll help you with the castration.”
The next day Xiao Yi drove Luzhou to the airport, he pulled a trolley while carrying a bag in his other hand, he carried another bag behind his back and Luzhou's Hermes bag hang around his neck on top of that. At boarding time Xiao Yi carried Luzhou's boarding pa.s.s to the first cla.s.s cabin, Luzhou's face changed as they went on the plane, he said: “Wuhan? What are we going to Wuhan for?”
“Wuhan is a very good place.” Xiao Yi turned over the magazine on the plane and said, “it's lively there during New Year!”. “