Chapter 231 - Memories (1/2)

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”Where...am...I…?” A voice suffused with weakness and exhaustion questioned. It sounded ghostly, as if it was flickering in and out of reality.

Yan Zaizen felt queasy. He tried to move, but his body was frozen. ”What…?” Attempting to open his eyes, he received no reaction. His senses didn't work either. The surroundings were a state of perpetual nothingness, not even the sound of the wind was in the air.

”...Am I dead?” His thoughts seemed to function but it didn't felt connected to his memories, as if they were independently formed and dissipated like sand. He couldn't retain any memory of his previous thoughts. It was only a very faint, vague feeling that he had 'thought' of this before.

”This state...it's what I was in when I opened the gate....right?” There was a brief but faint flickering light in the distance. This light seemed to contain a calling. It was exceptional powerful like hypnosis or subliminal messaging, attempting to persuade him to move towards it.

As he kept 'looking' at the light, he felt an exceptionally warm feeling like the womb of a mother or the embrace of a father. It felt protective, loving, and trustworthy.

”I...need to...go…” His odd state tried to walk towards the light. As he did, he moved for the first time since an indefinite amount of time. As he inched forward, he felt an increasing sense of warmth. This warmth felt addicting and true.

The light wasn't any discernible color. If one could say what color it was, it could be considered white as it held all and every color in existence, but it felt like a rainbow of infinite variety. What it appeared to be and what it felt like was fundamentally different.

After a period of time, unsure of short or long, he arrived a short way from the light. The light radiated emissions of wispy smoke. This smoke seemed to be hands or claws. They pressed forward calmly. Before long, Yan Zaizen was surrounded by these hands and claws.

”Is...this...death?” As he thought this, he had the strangest feeling that he was both smiling happily and frowning deeply at the same time. The conflict of emotions caused him to struggle deeply.

As he was pulled closer and closer to the strange light, a sigh filled with the vicissitudes of time resounded. A single line, thin and nearly impossible to see, swept between Yan Zaizen and the light. The hands and claws were severed.

Suddenly, a dark-amber glow erupted that pushed back the light. A demonic squealing sound erupted. It sounded hurt and angry, but it disappeared.

”What…?” Calmly watching these events, Yan Zaizen was shocked. What was happening? Where was he? What is that sound? Those thoughts formulated and dissipated. Before long, he had asked himself these questions nearly a thousand times in repetition.

A shadow with a ghostly shimmer appeared before Yan Zaizen. ”...” It didn't speak, but as Yan Zaizen 'looked' at it, he felt profound sadness and warmth.

A hand with an outstretched index finger formed from the ghostly figure. It pointed towards Yan Zaizen. It poked forward with a slow speed. Yan Zaizen didn't feel like he had a form or body, but as the finger approached, he felt a slight tremble throughout his entirety.

Shaa!

The finger 'touched' him. It lit up brightly, slowly increasing in brightness as time passed. Before long, it was blinding as the sun. Like a fire in frosty air, the light dimmed until it completely vanished.

Yan Zaizen felt his thoughts become clearer, his memory retention returning, and his 'form' felt as if it was in motion. Looking around, he saw the form that had touched him.

His eyes widened in shock.

”Me?” This was his first thought. However, he didn't know why. The ghostly shadow was faceless, featureless, and colorless, but he felt like it was him.