Chapter 6 – Den of Immortals (1/2)
Chapter 6 – Den of Immortals
Part 1
April 17. Morning.
Within two hours of sunrise, every disciple of the Flowered Flag Sect had made contact with their street-level informants, and distributed a picture and instructions.
The picture had been drawn by one of the most famous sketch artists in Jinan, drawn based on descriptions provided by the staff of “Big Zhao’s” restaurant. It depicted two people.
A middle-aged man named Wu Tao, sharp-faced with narrow eyes, a long nose and a wide mouth, dressed up like a traveling merchant.
Another, a young beggar called Ingot, round-faced with big eyes and a smile that produced two dimples. Completely adorable.
The instructions had been dispatched with “Level 1 Flowered Flag” urgency: expend all effort possible to track down the whereabouts of these two people.
Within an hour, even the local bailiffs and constables attached to the Jinan local government had joined the search.
This was because the three squads of the Jinan constabulary had received an anonymous tip that the businessman Wu Tao was very likely one of the four famous criminals wanted in all parts of China. In fact, he could well be the famous bandit who had three times broken into the Imperial Palace to make off with treasures, a person people in Jianghu viewed as second only to the “Bandit Chief” Chu Liuxiang [1]. The “Laughing General.”
***
On the wooden bench sat a large tray of onion sauce and flatbreads, a big bowl of tender stewed meat, and a large plate of spiced, stir-fried vegetables.
Old Master Tian usually ate breakfasts such as this. He believed that if you ate a good breakfast, you would have plenty of energy to accomplish things throughout the day.
Today, he didn’t eat much.
Today, he had something weighing on his mind, and felt somewhat emotional.
“The Laughing General, surnamed Li,” he said. “He’s really got guts. And skills.”
“His name is Li… what?”
“I don’t know. Nobody knows.”
“Okay,” said Frogboy, “Well then, why do people call him the Laughing General?”
“Everyone acknowledges that his skill and ability is only slightly lower than that of Chu Liuxiang, so they call him General.”
“What about the ‘Laughing’ part?”
“After every heist, he lets out three big laughs.” Old Master Tian sighed. “Back then, when people heard that laugh, some became so frightened that they actually pissed their pants.”
“Then what?”
“Then, gone.”
“Gone?” said Frogboy, confused. “What does that mean?”
“Gone means gone. By the time people heard that laugh, gone.”
“What was gone?”
“Gold, pearls, jewelry, ancient jades and paintings. Anything and everything the General wanted to take, gone.”
Old Master Tian sighed again. “Ten years ago, he himself was gone. Like a bowl of alcohol poured down your throat. Suddenly, just gone.”
“Not gone,” said Frogboy. “When I pour a bowl of alcohol down my throat, it goes into my stomach.”
“Still gone. When the alcohol reaches your stomach, it turns into piss. The alcohol is gone.”
He didn’t laugh, because what he said was no joke.
Frogboy didn’t laugh either.
He understood what his father meant. “The Laughing General who went missing for so many years turned into Wu Tao.”
Old Master Tian suddenly turned and looked at Xiao Jun. “The Beggar Sect’s Torture Chamber was just founded. There should be countless affairs to handle. You shouldn’t be here.”
“Correct.” When one word sufficed to express his intent, Xiao Jun wouldn’t use two.
“And yet here you are.”
“Correct.”
“Why?”
Xiao Jun thought for a moment. “Because of the Laughing General.”
He spoke the truth. Never before had he lied, so Old Master Tian found his answer satisfactory.
“Of course you’re here for him,” said Old Master Tian. “And so must have Three Panthers Niu been here for him. I suspect many people in Jianghu now know he is in Jinan.”
Frogboy still didn’t understand. “But, Wu Tao was not in Jinan before.”
“In Jinan or not, it doesn’t matter.”
“Why is that?”
“Because the person they should have come after wasn’t him.”
“Not him? Who, then?”
“Sun Jicheng.”
***
Of course it was Sun Jicheng.
After the Laughing General disappeared, he turned into Jinan’s multi-millionaire Sun Jicheng.
It wasn’t as if Frogboy hadn’t considered this.
He was no fool.
He just liked to ask questions, questions of all sorts, even questions he already knew the answer to.
“If people should have been coming after Sun Jicheng because they suspected him of being the Laughing General, then why would they suddenly be interested in Wu Tao?” he asked. “Don’t tell me Wu Tao and Sun Jicheng have some kind of connection?”
“I’m afraid so.”
“A big connection or a small connection?”
“A big one. A very big one. A deadly one.” He sighed. “Deadly for several people so far.”
***
Xiao Jun, his eyes staring off into the distance, slowly, one word at a time, said, “Sun Jicheng is dead. His killer is also dead. Why have his subordinates instigated such a huge search in Jinan?”
This was the critical question, a question that had already been asked multiple times, but that no one had been able to answer.
But this time, it was different.
As of now, there was someone who could answer the question, and that person was none other than Old Master Tian.
“Actually, the answer to the question is quite simple,” he said. “I can answer it in eight words.”
“Eight words?” asked Frogboy. “Which eight words?”
“Sun Jicheng actually isn’t even dead at all!”
This shocking statement would certainly surprise most people.
But Frogboy and Xiao Jun were not most people.
They were a minority amongst a minority.
And they were not surprised.
But Frogboy had another question to ask: “He clearly died, and everyone clearly saw his corpse. How could he not be dead?”
“Because Sun Jicheng didn’t die,” said Old Master Tian, “and that body was not his.”
“Whose was it?”
“Someone who looked very much like him, no doubt specially selected and manufactured for the specific purpose of acting as his double in death.”
“Specially selected, I understand,” said Frogboy. “But manufactured… What does that mean? What sort of manufacturing?”
“He selected someone who looked a lot like him, and then, using some special technique, made some alterations to the face.” Old Master Tian continued his explanation: “According to the rumors in Jianghu, the Laughing General got along well with Hua Shiniang. Hua Shiniang’s appearance altering arts are the best under heaven. Surely he learned a thing or two from her.”
“So he hid the person away in his cellar, just waiting for the time when it was necessary to replace him in death.”
“Right.”
“And by necessary, you mean when his secret was exposed.”
“Right.”
“So he strangled Liu Jin’niang, used Qiu Budao’s Divine Shaolin Palm to kill his body double, then forced Qiu Budao to drink poisoned wine. All to convince people that it was a crime of passion.”
“Right.”
“So even if people suspected Sun Jicheng to be the Laughing General, after he died, no one would come after him.”
“Right,” said Old Master Tian. And then he said, “Wrong.”
Frogboy laughed bitterly. “Is it right, or wrong?”
“You are right, he is wrong,” said Old Master Tian coldly. “He picked the wrong person to kill.”
“I don’t think he was wrong at all,” said Frogboy. “Liu Jin’niang made his clothes so well that they fit like a second skin. She obviously knew his body structure quite well. She no doubt would have been able to see that the body double wasn’t him, because every person’s body structure is different. If I were him, I would definitely have picked Liu Jin’niang.”
Old Master Tian suddenly got angry again. Slapping the table forcefully, he said, “But you’re not him! You’re just a little bastard who understands shit. In fact, you don’t even understand shit!”
Frogboy said nothing in response.
He could see that his father truly was angry, and he didn’t know why.
So he dared not open his mouth. But Xiao Jun did. “There’s definitely a flaw in his plan.”
He’d spoken seven words.
Actually, to express his full meaning would require probably thirteen or fourteen words, such as: “Sun Jicheng’s plan was thorough, but flawed; therefore, people realized he hadn’t died.”
But he’d spoken only seven words because he knew Old Master Tian would understand his meaning.
Old Master Tian nodded. “Of course there was a flaw,” he said. “Only lunatics believe in the perfect crime.”
“Sun Jicheng himself could sense it, therefore, he couldn’t help but return to check things out for himself.”
Old Master Tian laughed. “He probably thought it was safe, that no one would guess that he might come back.”
“So he came back,” said Xiao Jun. “And thus Wu Tao appeared in Jinan.”
***
That was the conclusion they reached.
But Frogboy had another question. “If Wutao is Sun Jicheng and the Laughing General, then who is Ingot the beggar?”
Old Master Tian, his face calm, said nothing.
Xiao Jun likewise remained silent.