Part 36 (1/2)

He broke eye contact and began serving up their plates. Far too much to think

about. Far too much yet to be done.

They were still sampling from the vast array of chafing dishes when Talia innocently rendered his planned retreat totally ineffective with a single volley.

”You know a great deal about me. I mean, about my past,” she began. ”I hardly know anything about you. I'd like to.”

He stilled, the ladle of gravy poised above his plate. He covered his sudden alarm with a grin. ”I'd say you know a great deal about me,” he said, She smiled, but there was that look in her eye, that determination he'd seen when she worked with a newly arrived orphan. He understood their panic now. Taking that step, handing over that trust, wasn't easy. He'd handed her a great deal more than he'd even known he had to offer. But this... this was territory he was extremely uncomfortable with.

”You've never really spoken of your family.”He clenched his fork so tightly he was surprised the heavy sterling didn't bend. So here he was, close enough to someone to care what they thought, scared enough to want to lie and avoid the whole issue. ”No, I haven't,” he said tightly, keeping his attention on his plate. Please, let it go, Tali, just let it go.He begged silently, without shame, because he knew he couldn't lie to her.

Of course, she didn't let it go. But not in the way he'd expected. And that was his final undoing. She fell silent, until he found himself looking up at her. She'd dropped her gaze to her plate. Her voice, when she spoke, was quiet. ”I'm guessing neither of us had an idyllic childhood.” She pushed her food around. ”I missed my mum for a long, long time.”

It wasn't calculated. And she was letting him off the hook, not trying to weasel more information out of him. So why he opened his mouth and said, ”I didn't miss mine,” he had no idea.

She looked up then and he met her eyes squarely. And what he saw wasn't pity, or even morbid curiosity. What he saw was understanding. From someone who knew what it was to be abandoned, to be left behind, to be unwanted. And suddenly it wasn't a hard decision to make. He only hoped she wouldn't be so turned off by his past that she distanced herself from him altogether. That was the risk he'd spent a lifetime avoiding.

If he never allowed anyone to get close, he never risked losing them. Of course, his whole life he'd believed he didn't need anyone close, thereby avoiding the whole issue. He hadn't counted on meeting someone who challenged that notion. Someone so important to him that he knew if he didn't share the past that had shaped the man he'd become, then whatever closeness they achieved would be built on a hollow foundation. And nothing worthwhile was built on a hollow foundation. If he expected her to accept him, she had to know all about him.

”Right,” he said under his breath. So why was he so b.l.o.o.d.y petrified? He put his fork down. ”My mother had a tough go of things.” He picked his fork up again. ”She, uh, she was on her own at an early age. A mining town in Queensland. Not a great place for a woman alone. But she made a living.” He stirred at his food, then put his fork down again.

Talia reached over and took his hand in hers. ”You don't have to-”He looked her directly in the eyes. ”Yes. I do.”She stilled, then she nodded, lacing her fingers through his. ”I'm guessing you didn't know your father, either, is that it?”

”Aye. My mum, she learned to survive. She was a good businesswoman.

Managed to carve out a life there.”

Talia smiled. ”So you come by your talents honestly?”

His grip on her hand tightened unwillingly. He made a conscious effort to

relax. ”I've always said that.” He'd said it a bit harshly and maybe he hadn't been as understanding of his mother as he'd always told himself he was.

”Hopefully I've a bit of my dad in me, as well.”

Talia's eyebrows lifted. ”What bit is that? I've always wondered what part of me is like my dad, for that matter like my mom, too. But it's too much torture to spend time on it.”

”Agreed.” He took a deep breath. ”Well, there's no way around it, so here's the thing. My mum's business was selling her body. And she'd made it quite a commodity.”

”Oh, Archer, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-””It's okay.” And oddly, it was, As terrifying as it was, it felt good to get it out. ”Anyway, getting pregnant wasn't part of her business plan. She tried to get rid of me.” He grinned briefly. ”But I was a stubborn blodger, even before I was born.”

Talia smiled, but her eyes were sad. ”What happened to you?”

”Well, being the businesswoman that she was, she fed and housed me, more or

less as an investment. One that took five years to mature before she cashed in

on it.”

”Oh, Devin!” Talia covered her mouth in horror.

He quickly reached for her hand and pulled it away. ”No, not that way. But

she had no intention of continuing my care and feeding, either. Cramped her already cramped lifestyle. Australia is a land colonized by convicts, but since your time much has happened there. When contact with other people... and by that I mean people not of this planet... was made, a certain ages-old trade sprang up once again.” He paused, then spit out the rest in one long breath. ”A slave trade. I think she got her money's worth and I got a firsthand lesson in the law of supply and demand. It's held me in good stead in this life. But I'd like to think I'd do things different. That's the bit of my dad I hope I got. Or maybe it's the part that's all me.”

”She sold you into slavery?” She wasn't just horrified now, she was p.i.s.sed.

Archer rather liked that reaction.

”You were only a little boy!” She looked down at the hand that held hers, then turned them over. ”Those lines. The scars.” She traced the thin, silvery lines that circled his wrists.

He knew, as she did now, that they also marked his ankles. Her eyes drifted to his neck, and he knew what she saw there, as well. There were other reminders, too. He hated the idea that he might repulse her now.

”I thought-” She stopped and swallowed. ”I know you lead a fairly rough life, and I noticed the scars but I thought they were the battle wounds that came with a tough business.” She looked back at him, her eyes round and gla.s.sy. ”I never imagined-Never would have thought- Oh, Devin.”

It wasn't repulsion he saw there. It was pain. Maybe he shouldn't have told her.

She felt things too keenly. ”I didn't mean to hurt you by telling you this.”