Part 13 (1/2)

Chapter Twenty-One.

My family is falling apart.

Frankie is gone. Bob is here, but not really here at all. Ari disappears for hours at a time. And Clark is still uncomfortable around me, no matter how much effort we put into our strained friends.h.i.+p.

In a moment of madness, I think about calling Marco just to hear a friendly voice. Luckily, that moment of madness is just that. A moment. Xavier hasn't said a word to me from yesterday. And I know in my heart that he's disappointed in us. In me. I can see the hurt inside of him. He doesn't want this. But that's what happens when you make a deal with the devil. Any time something sounds too good to be true, it usually is.

With Xavier walking the grounds with Tomas, I am bored out of my mind. I think about tagging along, but something tells me to keep my distance from Xavier right now.

He needs time to adjust.

I was born into this. This has been my entire life. I don't know any different. For anyone else, the change would be astronomical. I don't blame him for feeling betrayed. I would, too.

My garden doesn't need attending, and is looking greener and healthier each pa.s.sing day, so I sit quietly on the bench under the large oak and contemplate life. In a spontaneous decision, I stand and walk over to the barn. I key in my code and enter. I try not to look suspicious, but my motivations are not good ones. I know Clark is at lunch and Ari is in the church with Bob, leaving me alone in Mirage.

As I reach the first floor, I hesitate. I mentally argue with myself, and win. Without a second thought, I make my way down the stairs to the ground floor. I stand by the two desks. Both computer monitors are on. I don't like the idea of intruding in someone else's workplace, so I sit at Marco's old desk.

All this thought about family has my mind reeling with unanswered questions. Questions it's time were resolved.

Who am I?

Where did I come from?

Do I have any living biological family? Maybe brothers or sisters?

My heart swells with hope. That would be awesome.

I'm prompted to type in my username and pa.s.sword. I do and a window opens.

Full access.

I've been granted full access to the Mirage database. Excitement makes my head pound.

I start by scanning my bio and alternate identification doc.u.ments. I quickly view the photographs. Some I have posed for, some candid. Shot from far away. When I get to the tab marked history, my eyes widen and my throat tightens.

This is it.

Swallowing hard, I click on the tab. A small window comes up. I frown.

Access Denied. Enter Pa.s.sword.

Access denied? Access denied?

Are you kidding me right now? Why the f.u.c.k am I denied access to my own history? Anger heats my cheeks. I start keying in codes that might possibly work.

CatarinaWhite.

Denied.

Mirage.

Nope.

FatherRobert.

Try again.

RobertWhite.

Better luck next time, kid.

BobWhite.

Denied, denied, freaking denied.

I push away from the table with a huff. Frustration has my hands shaking. I'm so close. I can feel it. There's something important there. I refuse to feel the stinging behind my eyes and take a deep breath. I inhale then exhale slowly, forcing the anger out of me.

Blinking, I pull myself forward and try again.

NightFury.

Access denied.

Okay. I take a breath and think. I wrack my brain for something anything that might help. But nothing comes. My shoulders slump. In a last ditch attempt, I lazily type without feeling.

CatarinaNightFuryWhite.

I hit the enter key hard and drop my forehead to the desk. Head meet desk. I chuckle silently. Seems appropriate. This was probably a good thing. No point in dwelling in the past forever. How am I supposed to have a good future if I can't move on? I can't change things.