Part 82 (1/2)
You know, my dear Master, that the reverence I have for your art, even if I am not always capable of grasping it, equals the admiration I feel for the singing of Mrs. Adams-Ortenburg. I know how much you two mutually owe to each other, and how you--if I may say so--complement each other musically. And it would never occur to me to put any difficulties whatsoever in the way of your continued artistic relations.h.i.+p. I am equally aware of the tenderness with which you regard your child--for whom, by the way, as you probably know, I have a great deal of devotion--and I can give you my word that the doors leading to the quarters of little Peter will always stand open to you.
AMADEUS
In other words, you would have no objection to seeing the former husband of your--of the wife--of the Princess Lohsenstein, admitted to your house as a friend?
SIGISMUND
Any such objection would be regarded by me as an insult to your--to my--to Mrs. Cecilia Adams-Ortenburg, as well as to you, my dear Master.
With those provisions made, the new arrangement, which I am taking the liberty to suggest, would be more sensible and--if you'll allow me a frank expression--more decent than the one to which all of us now have to submit. I am convinced, my dear Master, that, when you have had chance to consider the matter calmly, you will not only agree with me, but you will be surprised that this simple solution of an unbearable situation has not occurred to yourself long ago. As for me, I want to add that, to me personally, this solution seems the only possible one.
Yes, I don't hesitate to say that I would leave the city, without hope of ever seeing Mrs. Cecilia again, rather than keep on compromising her in a manner that must be equally painful to all of us.
AMADEUS
Oh, has it come to that all at once? Well, if the matter doesn't trouble Cecilia or me, I think _you_ might well regard it with indifference. I hope you know that we have arranged our life to suit ourselves, without the least regard for popular gossip, and that I don't care at all whether or no Cecilia be compromised--as you call it.
SIGISMUND
I know you don't. But I feel differently. A lady to whom I'm so devoted, and whom I respect so highly that I would lead her to the altar, must appear spotless to G.o.d and man alike.
AMADEUS
You might have kept that in mind before. Your previous behavior has given no indication of such a view. You have been waiting for my wife in the immediate vicinity of the opera; you have been walking with her for hours at a time; you have visited her in the country; you have followed her to Berlin and come back here in her company....
SIGISMUND (_surprised_)
But it was in your power to stop all those things, if they didn't suit you....
AMADEUS
Stop them ... because they didn't suit...? What has that to do with what I am talking of?--I am not the person who has found this situation unbearable and compromising.
SIGISMUND
Oh, I understand. Considering, however, that you have placed such emphasis on your indifference to popular gossip, I must say that your tone sounds pretty excited. But permit me to a.s.sure you that this impresses me rather pleasantly. Bear in mind that I am merely human.
What young man in my place would have refrained from meeting the adored one, when everything was rendered so easy for him? And nevertheless I didn't visit the Pustertal or make the tour to Berlin without an inward struggle--in fact, I have often had to struggle with myself while waiting for her near the opera. And I cannot tell you how I have suffered under the searching glances directed at Mrs. Adams-Ortenburg and myself when we were having supper together after one of the Berlin performances, for instance, or when we went for an afternoon drive in the Tiergarten.[7] Not to speak of the painful impression my aunt's remarks made on me when I called to bid her good-by! Really, I can't find words to express it.
[7] A large park in the center of Berlin, corresponding to the Central Park of New York or the Hyde Park of London.
AMADEUS
How much longer do you mean to keep up this remarkable comedy, my dear Prince?
SIGISMUND (_drawing back_)
Do you mean....
AMADEUS