Part 3 (1/2)

”Yes,” I said again, this time looking away from those serious blue eyes. ”But you can stop feeling sorry for me. I expected nothing else when I left the Inadni, so I wasn't surprised. Was there anything else of vast importance that you wanted, or can I go back to my tent now?”

”So you use insolence and arrogance to keep people from reaching too close to you,” he said, a calculating tone to the words. ”You won't accept having someone feel sorry for you no matter what you've got to go through, not even if it's friendly concern rather than pity. Hasn't anyone ever told you how dangerous a defense reaction that is? If I didn't have the self control that I do, you'd already have gotten more than one good beating from me.”

”Possibly if you used your Power,” I said, turning my head to meet his level blue gaze and letting amus.e.m.e.nt color the words. ”Without the Power you'd need those guardsmen you have stationed outside, and they'd have to be really good. If I didn't have the use of my skills they wouldn't have to be all that good - but you'd still need them.”

”I can see you also enjoy insulting people on purpose,” he growled, straightening a little where he sat in reaction to what I'd said. ”If I ever decide to give you a good beating, I won't need the Power or those guardsmen. If you don't believe that, just keep pus.h.i.+ng me.”

He paused then, possibly to give me a chance to enjoy myself a little more, but I really was too tired. I could have defended myself if I'd had to, but it would be a good deal easier once I had more rest and food to add to my strength. Rather than saying anything I simply continued to hold his gaze, but that didn't do much to lighten his mood.

”Under certain circ.u.mstances, even the G.o.ds have more patience than men,” I was told with the same growl, dark blue eyes glinting at me. ”I think you'll have the opportunity to learn that.

A few days from now, when all our preparations are complete, you'll be taken back to that city where you were held as a slave. You'll guide our people to the places they have to be, and then you'll see to the individual tasks I a.s.sign you. When you enter the city you'll be dressed and collared as a slave, so be prepared to also act like one.”

”You expect me to accept being enslaved again?” I asked with a laugh that had absolutely no amus.e.m.e.nt in it, abruptly sitting up straighter. ”If you do, you're in for a great disappointment.

Now that I'm free again, I intend to stay that way.”

”You'll only be pretending to be a slave,” he answered with continuing annoyance, gesturing aside my refusal. ”If you enter that city as a free woman, you run the risk of having someone recognize you as a runaway slave. If you're still ostensibly a slave, Prince Garam can always say he found you in the forest and is trying to return you to where you belong.”

”Garam!” I said with more incredulity than I had earlier, wondering if the man of Power was losing his grip on reality. ”Even if I did agree to pretend to being a slave, I'll be d.a.m.ned if I'd do it with him holding the chain. After the way he's been talking to me, I've already promised myself his blood. If you need a slave act all that badly, you can find someone else to take Garam's place.”

”All right, girl, I can see it's time you were told exactly how things stand,” Fearin said, abruptly back in complete calm control of himself. ”You may be dedicated to Bellid and the possessor ofmore skills than any of us completely understands, but you, just like the rest of us, are subject to the commands of Diin-tha. The G.o.d said you're to pretend to be a slave, and Prince Garam, because of our need to have him in the city, will be the one you pretend to be a slave with. He would be the one even if we didn't need him in the city; he won't have any trouble treating you like a slave, whereas Prince Talasin and Ranander would. If you try to refuse this command, you'll find a good deal more than the beating you would have had from me. Do I need to go into details?”

Once again I didn't answer him in words, but my silence was answer enough. Even those who had no truck with the G.o.ds knew what it could mean to face their wrath; I, who knew better than most and not simply through personal experience, also knew that a quiet, final ending would not be what I faced. Had it been, I would have gotten to my feet and happily left the tent and the camp as well.

”Prince Garam will be under strict orders not to cause you any harm,” Fearin said after a pair of moments, and I realized I was no longer looking at him. ”Above that our attack won't be long in coming after you've entered the city, so you shouldn't have to wear the collar beyond the length of a single day. And just remember: once the city is ours, you'll be free to ... go looking for anyone there you feel you'd really like to see again.”

”Except in certain specific cases, I'm not allowed to take revenge,” I said, still staring at the place that had been the center of the circle. ”No one in the city meets those requirements, so it's a waste of time wis.h.i.+ng they did. Was there anything else?”

”No,” he said, this time sounding definitely weary. ”No, right now there's nothing else. I'll tell you what else I need you to do just before you leave for the city. Go back to your tent and sleep well.”

Since there was nothing else to say, I simply got to my feet and left. I spent the short walk back to my tent realizing all over again just how much I hated to be pitied.

Chapter 4.

It wasn't a very pretty mid morning as we rode through the forest, but the threat of rain didn't bother anyone in the party. The others were undoubtedly thinking about the city we rode toward, but certainly not in the same way I was thinking about it. This was only the fourth day since I'd escaped from the place, and to say I was reluctant about going back, even in pretend slavery, was like saying the world contained many unexplained mysteries. The words were true, but didn't tell the story by half.

The previous three days had seen quite a lot in the way of military preparation, with a bustle that gave me the feeling everyone was running in a different direction all the time at top speed.

Talasin, Lokkel, and Garam spent most of their time with the troops of guardsmen who were spread out thicker through the forest than I'd first believed. Fearin divided his time between the troops, the men leading them, and setting the air atingle from inside his tent, and Ranander was either with Fearin or carrying messages for the High Master.

I was the only one who hadn't chased hither and yon with grim purpose, but that didn't mean I hadn't been given orders by Fearin. I was ordered to sleep and eat as much as I possibly could, which took away something of the pleasure I should have felt over doing just that.

The ground rose under our horses hooves as we angled away from the stream, and a small covey of birds began to scold at us from the surrounding trees. Aside from the creak of leather and the soft breathing of men and mounts, the birds and the hoofbeats were the only exceptions to the silence all around. In an innocent, unknowing way it was almost peaceful, just like the last few days had been peaceful - almost.

”Things are too hectic right now, Aelana, but just you wait,” Ranander had told me once, taking time out from his busy schedule to rea.s.sure me. ”As soon as that city falls to us, youand I will have the time to get to know each other a little better. And I'm really curious to know what Shadowborn means.”

He'd flashed me a grin and then he'd hurried off, happily continuing on with Fearin's errands.

I'd found myself standing there shaking my head, wondering at the same time if I'd finally found a real, live, beneficial use for the horror, fear, and revulsion that was the truth about Shadowborn. For some reason beyond my comprehension Ranander had decided to sleep with me, and the only things that had kept him from carrying out his decision - or at least trying to carry it out - was at first my weakened condition and then the preparations for war. Since I didn't want to have to hurt that strangely innocent boy-man, I was actually relieved that the details of what I was would send him hurrying out of my life.

Details which would be forthcoming from Fearin, as soon as the High Master had the time to pa.s.s them on. The afternoon before I'd been invited to the man's tent, to be offered wine and told what I'd need to do the following day.

”No, I haven't discussed your abilities with any of the others yet,” he'd said when I put the question a bit impatiently, gesturing for me to sit on his golden floor weaving and help myself to a cup of wine. He seemed to be ignoring my unhappiness with him, not knowing or not caring how hard it was waiting for the grand announcement to be made.

”Why haven't you told them?” I'd demanded, sitting down but doing nothing about taking wine.

”Don't you think they have a right to know what they're sharing a camp with? Will you be happier if one of them finds out the hard way?”

”First I have to find out what we're sharing a camp with,” he'd returned as he'd leaned one elbow down to a cus.h.i.+on, the words definitely on the arid side. ”Since the only one who knows for certain refuses to part with more than hints and innuendoes, I've begun to research the matter in my own way. By the time this skirmish is over I should know something definite to pa.s.s on, which I will then do. Until that time, I don't think any of us has to worry about accidents. Our Guardian is the sort to antic.i.p.ate and prevent any unnecessary ...

complications.”

”Complications,” I'd echoed in a dissatisfied mutter, not caring much for the way he dismissed what could turn out to be a real problem. ”And isn't 'skirmish' a rather lighthearted description for the taking of a city? Your force won't be the first to try getting through and over those walls. What makes you think they'll have any better luck than those who came before them?”

”Those who came before my troops didn't have me to help,” he'd answered with what had seemed more like amus.e.m.e.nt than boasting, then he paused to sip his wine before continuing.

”You'll be surprised to see what a little Power can do in the way of aiding a campaign. Or, possibly, I should say you won't be seeing it, since you'll be occupied with another task during our attack. Why don't you take some wine and then we can get down to details.”

”Let's start with a detail about wine,” I'd said, finally seeing that I would have to explain why I kept refusing his hospitality in so rude a way. ”I can drink a very small amount of wine without worrying, but if I tried to swill it the way the rest of you do your ... Guardian would have to be here in person to stop what would probably happen. One of the first things the Inadni teach is a ... reaching out, an intensification of everything you see, hear, feel - in any and every way experience. A whisper is like a shout, a glimmer is like a blaze - and a cup of wine is like a keg.

I can handle the cup, but after that things start to get fuzzy and uncontrollable.”

”Uncontrollable,” he'd repeated the way I had, a peculiar expression crossing his face briefly before he had it in hand again. ”I see. Or at least I'm beginning to get a glimmer. If you say you don't want something, it's best to ask before insisting, just in case you have a reason other than stubbornness for refusing. I'll be sure to remember that.”

He'd examined me briefly with a stare then, possibly waiting to see if I had anything to add; when he was sure I didn't, he'd nodded and continued.

”As I said, it's time you knew the details of what will be happening tomorrow. A group of our people will enter or have already entered the city, and there are certain places they have to be.Some of those places, like the guardsmen's barracks and the wing of the palace housing the city Administrators, aren't hard to find so the men a.s.signed to those places will manage on their own. If they have to ask directions they can do it openly, and no one will get suspicious.

Other places, however, won't be the same, and those are the places you'll be guiding them to.”

”If too many of those places are in the better part of the city, you might have to find yourself another guide,” I'd said. ”I was a slave, remember, and not the kind who's allowed to wander as she likes. From time to time I was put to work in the city and those locations I remember how to reach, but for places I've never been... ”

I'd shrugged to show him there was nothing I could do to make the truth sweeter, but he'd waved a hand in unconcern.

”The places we're most interested in are maintained with slave labor, so that shouldn't be a problem,” he'd said, unperturbed by the suggestion that I might not be as useful as he'd expected. ”Ranander has the complete list, and as soon as he gets here with it we'll all go over it together. Right now we need to discuss how you'll guide a group of men to different places without someone getting suspicious.”

He'd paused to swallow his wine again, and it's possible I wasn't supposed to notice that he was also studying me again. For that reason alone I'd kept my expression the way it had been, but inside I'd been more than annoyed. So it was Ranander who had the list of places I was supposed to guide people to, and for that reason alone Ranander would be here when Fearin asked if I knew how to get to those places. Ranander, who knew when people were telling the truth - and when they were lying.

Remembering that almost made me hiss my breath out in vexation, and that despite the relative peace and quiet we rode through. It had been fairly clear that Fearin didn't want to spend time wondering if I really didn't know how to get to the places I would claim as unfamiliar, or if I was actually trying to prove my pretending to be a slave would be a waste of time. The fact that I'd already thought of that very same point made it all doubly annoying, but there hadn't been anything I could do to take advantage of the idea. Insisting that Ranander not be there would have been tantamount to announcing that I intended being as truthful as a southern caravan merchant.

”Prince Garam and I developed the plan together, and now it's up to you to find fault with it if you can,” Fearin had continued after his pause. ”Having a slave guide a group of free men would be unusual enough, but having that same slave guide men who aren't supposed to know each other would be bound to make a city spy follow along to see what was going on. You do know that the city uses paid spies to keep an eye on its people and find out what they're up to.”

”Everyone in the city knows that,” I'd answered his half-question, making a face over the situation. ”Those of us who were slaves found it really funny, to think that all those n.o.bly wonderful free people were being watched as closely and as carefully as those free people watched us. The only difference between us seemed to be that we were in cages and they weren't.”

”I understand there were numerous times when that distinction abruptly didn't apply,” Fearin said with a sound of derision, s.h.i.+fting on his elbow cus.h.i.+on. ”If those spies find anyone doing what they shouldn't be doing, the city usually ends up with more gold in its treasury because of a fine, or the owners.h.i.+p of another slave because of the gravity of the crime. One of the few things they don't bother people about is how they treat privately-owned slaves, and there's an excellent reason for that. If people spend their anger on abusing their own property, they're less likely to notice how unhappy they are and then turn on the city and its officials.”