Part 14 (2/2)

”Come on, you've hardly had a civil word for anyone and what's with the vodka?”

”It's all just too weird for me Katy,” he said looking far into the distance. ”Just too weird.”

”What's weird?”

”This is. Don't you think it's weird that this is the last time we will ever see each other?”

”Guess so but it's not exactly been a barrel of laughs has it?”

”No but, it's been good you know,” he said, turning to face her. ”Apart from making me sing stupid songs. We were good once weren't we? Really good. And I screwed it up.” He paused. ”Ever wonder what might have been? You know, if I hadn't been such a d.i.c.k.”

”No, never,” Katy lied.

”I do.”

”Don't.”

”I can't help it,” said Matthew, letting his head sink into his hands. Katy wasn't sure what to say. She hadn't expected this.

Suddenly Matthew's head shot up and he looked at Katy.

”Let me see you and the baby. Just once, I promise. I think I need to see you both. So I can get closure or something. Say a proper goodbye and then draw the line. Then I'll be able to move on. I think that will make me feel better.”

Katy stared back at him completely dumbstruck.

”Make you feel better?” she said finally through gritted teeth. ”That sums it up doesn't it? You just don't get it do you?” She was shouting right in his ear now to make sure he could hear her. ”Listen carefully. This is not about you. This is about the baby and me and Ben and us somehow making this work. And it is about your wife and your two kids on their way any day. You have to do what's right for other people now Matthew, not what might make you feel better.”

”But I can't help the fact that I care about you and what happens to the baby,” he said, rocking himself backwards and forwards.

Katy closed her eyes and tried to slow down her rapid breathing.

”The time to care was right about when you were s.h.a.gging the Virgin Mary, not now. You missed it Matthew. Well and truly missed it.”

Matthew looked utterly defeated for a moment and then his face hardened.

”I was stupid and I'm sorry, but you slept with me and I didn't see you worrying about Ben. Now you're planning the rest of your life with him despite the fact he's an idiot.”

”Leave it Matthew. It's nothing to do with you and you have absolutely no right to say that.”

”But he could be bringing up my child.”

”Stop. That's enough. How dare you talk like this now. We dealt with this weeks ago remember? Ben will be the father of this child, end of story. Now just leave it alone.”

Matthew stared at her briefly before saying, ”Fine, if that is the way you want it. Just don't come running to me when he walks out on you because he can't take the responsibility.” He got up and walked unsteadily in the direction of the gents.

What a t.w.a.t, she thought. How dare he ask to see the baby and how dare he say Ben was going to let her down. Deep down, however, she knew Matthew might be right. Despite Ben's sudden upturn in att.i.tude, come crunch time, he might not be able to take the pressure. She looked around for him, frantically needing some immediate rea.s.surance. He was talking to some of Luke's friends by the bar. She breathed heavily, trying not to cry, and made her way over. Just as she got within a few yards of him she felt the tears spring up like a sprinkler on a late-night timer. She tried sniffing vigorously but there was nothing she could do, they were off and running. Ben looked horrified at the blubbering mess advancing towards him. He muttered some words to the three boys talking to him, who took one look at Katy and backed away in terrified awe.

”What is it?” What's happened?” asked Ben putting his arm around her.

Katy breathed in hard again, trying desperately to regain some control.

”Katy my love, was it the trifle?” asked Ben. ”Did Charlene's mum make you eat it? I know it tastes like rat poison but I really don't think anyone who names her children after Neighbours characters would deliberately try to harm you. Although I did hear she wants to kill off all the guests so they won't have to return the presents come divorce time.”

Katy couldn't help but smile, then slowly but surely her shoulders began to shake with laughter as she buried her head in a tissue. She dried her eyes and gave a big sigh. G.o.d it was good to have Ben back on form.

”So what did the t.o.s.s.e.r say this time? I saw you talking to him,” said Ben turning serious. ”He wasn't giving you grief about telling me about you and him was he? Because if he was, I'll have to have a word with him. It's his lie not yours. It wasn't your idea not to tell her.”

”No Ben, it wasn't that. He was just a bit worried you know that, well you had taken it badly and were taking it out on me. That's all, nothing really.”

”You what? He thinks I'm giving you a hard time over his stupid b.l.o.o.d.y secrets. Christ he's got a nerve. Who the h.e.l.l does he think he is, playing all these games?”

”It's not a game honestly Ben, just a stupid lie that got out of hand that's all.”

”A stupid lie that was ridiculous in the first place. What kind of crazy relations.h.i.+p do they have that Matthew is scared s.h.i.+tless of confessing previous girlfriends?” said Ben, getting worked up.

”Ben, please just forget about it, it's really not worth it.”

”Back in a minute,” he mumbled and walked off.

Katy was about to reach for her tissues again when she noticed where he was going. Within moments the gents door shrieked then slammed with an ominous bang.

Matthew was standing unsteadily at the urinal, with his back to the room when Ben walked in. It was empty other than whatever inhabitants were encouraged by decades of grime and stale p.i.s.s. There were two cubicles to the right but only one had a door and a bare bulb flickered distractedly in the middle of the room making everything look like a scene from a B-movie.

There were three urinals and Matthew had taken the one to the far right allowing any newcomer to leave the one in the middle free in accordance with male toilet etiquette. Ben could sense that Matthew was therefore somewhat surprised when someone brushed up right next to him.

”So Katy tells me you're worried that I'm giving her a hard time because it somehow slipped both your minds that you used to go out together. That is despite the fact you've had a reminder tattooed to your shoulders for the last G.o.d knows how many years.”

The shock of the intrusion caused Matthew to halt mid-flow. He looked up at Ben and puffed his chest out.

”No, Ben. I was just checking she was alright. She needs looking after. She is about to have a baby.”

”Don't you think I know that? I'm doing it. I'm doing it and then you come along and upset everything,” said Ben.

”Doing what?” Matthew let out a small laugh. ”What are you doing exactly Ben? Because to be honest I don't see you doing that much.” Matthew called a halt to his interrupted stream and tucked himself away before turning to face Ben head on.

”All you ever did was a.r.s.e around at the cla.s.ses. You're out all the time with your mates and you still think it's a good idea to go to a stag-do when the baby is due. Honestly Ben, I don't think you're up to it. You need to grow up or leave Katy to it. No father is better than a father who doesn't give a s.h.i.+t and Katy deserves better than that.”

The door burst open and Scott came hurtling in.

”Mister, mister,” he said breathlessly to Ben. ”Your girlfriend is outside and she says I've got to get you out right now and she'll buy me a half of shandy if I don't tell me mum.” Scott grabbed Ben's hand and started pulling for all he was worth.

Ben's stony gaze did not move from Matthew's face.

”If you get out now I'll buy you a pint,” said Ben.

”What of shandy, or do you mean a real pint.”

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