Part 25 (2/2)

Toni felt a sharp stab of homesickness at the sound of her friend's voice. At Megan's innocent ”How are you?” Toni wanted to lock herself in the bathroom and give her a play-by-play rundown of the events of the last few days, starting with the call from Marcy and ending with her confusing and dangerous reaction to Ethan Taggart. If anyone could talk sense into her, it was Megan.

But Ethan was staring at her, his arms folded across his bare, hard chest as he waited for her to get off the phone. Toni would keep Megan on the phone all night if it meant avoiding the discussion Ethan wanted to have.

Toni offered a semi-sincere ”Fine” in response to Megan's greeting.

”You don't sound fine,” Megan replied, ”but I have excellent news.”

”Good, because I need it.”

Ethan c.o.c.ked a dark eyebrow and made a ”wrap it up” motion with his hand.

Toni walked over to the window, showing him her back. She heard his heavy footsteps thud across the hardwood floor, the thump as a kitchen cabinet was opened with unnecessary force.

”Sounds like there's a juicy story there somewhere,” Megan replied, and Toni couldn't help but look at Ethan, who was still watching her and obviously eavesdropping. ”Too bad I'm about to go into a meeting. But I wanted to tell you-I got the job in Paris!”

Toni made appropriately excited sounds and offered her congratulations. Megan had been trying to get transferred to the Paris office for six months now.

”That's not the only good thing,” Megan continued. ”I'm only going for a year, so I'm keeping my apartment. I already talked to my landlord, and he's totally cool with you subletting it until I get back. Isn't that great?”

”Yeah, great.” Toni's reply sounded lackl.u.s.ter to her own ears. What was wrong with her? This was the solution to all of her problems. Megan's apartment was gorgeous, located only a few blocks from where Toni had lived. Better yet, her landlord was a family friend, so her rent was well below market value. And because Toni wouldn't have to come up with a security deposit, she didn't need to wait to build up her bank account before she could move.

All she had to do was pack up her stuff and head north. Megan's apartment was furnished, and Toni could fit all of her stuff in the trunk of a car.

”Why don't you sound more excited?” Megan asked. ”This is the perfect solution to the mess John left you in after he dumped you.”

”I know,” Toni said, doing her best to brighten her tone. ”This is great news.” But the reason for her lack of enthusiasm was less than twenty feet away, chugging a gla.s.s of water before slamming it down on the granite counter, watching her with an intense blue gaze that made her insides melt like hot fudge. Less than a week ago, Toni would have been jumping for joy at Megan's news. Knowing that she didn't have to wait until the end of the summer to move back to Seattle should have had her over the moon.

But that was before she had met Ethan, before he'd blown through her defenses and shown her exactly how amazing a physical connection between two people could be. But it was more than mere s.e.x. He'd stripped her naked in more ways than one. She'd talked more to him about Mich.e.l.le and how her sister's death had affected her than she ever had to anyone. He alone seemed to be able to get her to admit to feelings she'd rather keep boxed up and stored away in some deep, dark corner of herself.

He'd told her he loved her.

But she couldn't stake her future on something he said at the height of climax.

Could she?

Even as every logical brain cell warned her he would get bored quickly and move on, something about him tugged at her, pulled her in, until the thought of moving back to Seattle and never seeing him again was enough to make her physically ill.

Didn't she know better than this? Hadn't her experience with John been enough to teach her not to change her plans for any man? She knew exactly what she had to do to be successful, and John had thrown her so far off track she'd been afraid for a time that she'd never get back on. Now she had the chance to get back to her friends and to the life she'd missed so much in the past year. Was she actually contemplating giving it up? And for what? Because she was stupid enough to let a handful of o.r.g.a.s.ms fool her into believing this was true love?

Really, Toni, what in G.o.d's name do you think is going to happen? That he's going to declare his everlasting love for you? Ethan Taggart can have any woman he wants-and most likely already has. Are you seriously dumb enough to fall for the whole taming-the-bad-boy fantasy?

Toni was a lot of things, but stupid wasn't one of them. What she had with Ethan was nothing more than a hot fling, made all the more intense by the crazy circ.u.mstances of this case. Now the case was closed, Kara was home, and Toni couldn't let herself be distracted from her plan.

”I can't wait to get back,” Toni said, almost convincing herself that she meant it. Ethan's eyebrows shot up, then furrowed slightly. ”I've been dying to get out of here for months.”

”I can't wait to see you! But I'm leaving for France at the end of August, so you have to get up here before that so we can hang out for a little while before I go.”

”I just have to wrap up a few details on a case and pack up my stuff. After that, I'm out of here.”

Toni hung up, trying to ignore the imposing male presence now standing about two inches behind her. As if Ethan would ever be ignored.

”Who was that?” he demanded.

”My friend Megan.” She told him the news about the apartment. ”I'd been planning to move back sometime this fall, as soon as I could get enough money saved up. But now I don't have to wait. Isn't that awesome?”

He looked at her as if she'd just grown two heads. ”You're moving back to Seattle?” he asked.

”I've been planning it for the last year. I moved here to be with John,” she said, not wanting to go into the details of how, in addition to being cheated on, she'd found herself financially stranded here or else she would have moved back immediately. She didn't want him to see how pathetic she really was. ”Since we broke up, there isn't much point in my staying.”

”What about us?” he said.

”What 'us' Ethan? We've known each other for four days.” Her heart picked up speed, and she tried not to let herself get caught up in wild fantasies of ending happily ever after with Ethan Taggart.

He leaned into her, pressing her up against the wall. ”Tell me you don't feel anything. Tell me you don't feel something real here.”

”Okay, I can't deny there's something, but it's not enough to base the rest of my life on.” He leaned in and kissed her, sliding his tongue against hers in a way that made her want to give in, promise him anything. ”People don't fall in love in four days,” she repeated, feebly.

”Maybe I have,” he said and kissed her again.

CHAPTER 18.

E THAN CUPPED TONI'S face, holding her still as he pinned her against the wall and devoured her mouth. His hands shook with frustration and l.u.s.t. And, yeah, a little bit of fear.

Okay, a whole f.u.c.king lot of fear.

There was a reason he didn't do love, didn't do commitment. He'd seen what love had done to his father, seen how his mother's abandonment had wrecked a strong man. Ethan never wanted to be that weak.

Yet here he was, handing over his heart to a woman too scared to take it. Didn't she realize he was terrified, too? Terrified of getting hurt, opening himself up and letting someone inside?

But after he'd blurted out the love he'd only barely acknowledged, he figured it was up to him to be brave. Or stupid, depending on how you looked at it.

”I love you,” he said, the words sounding angry to his own ears.

”Don't,” Toni gasped against his mouth, almost crying. ”Don't say that.”

He nipped her lip in punishment, then slicked his tongue over the sore spot. ”Why not?”

Her fingers dug into the bare skin of his back, kneading the tense muscles. ”Because I want to believe you too much, and we both know it's not true.”

His c.o.c.k swelled against the zipper of his pants, insistent, needing. ”You can believe me, please believe me.” Christ, was he begging? He kissed her throat and sucked at the delicate skin.

”Please don't do this to me,” she said, her voice high and breathy. ”I don't want to talk right now. It's too much.”

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