Part 25 (2/2)

She shook her head, then shrugged. ”I have an apt.i.tude for languages, and mainly I was used to interpret codes and messages, mostly Arab. I'm also good with numbers and have broken a few numerical codes too.”

He couldn't help but chuckle once more. ”I can't wait for the rest of my life to get to know you, Minerva Ferguson. You are the most fascinating person I've ever encountered. I'm so honored-” His voice broke before he could tell her how honored he was to have her in his life.

She kissed him. It was sweet and gentle. Yet, nonetheless there was an urgency mixed with her lips, almost a desperation to keep him near. It was endearing. She pushed against him to sit up, and he let her. Feeling her body's movement internally made him feel thick and tight all over again. His c.o.c.k twitched, but she adjusted herself, and he slipped out of her.

”d.a.m.n,” he whispered, longing to be back inside her slick s.e.x.

She circled the girth of him with her fingers, making him moan and close his eyes. ”We have to go home right away and take care of this.”

He nodded and gently rocked into her hand.

”Can you do that, General? Can you come home with me now?”

He opened his eyes and tried his best to think as she stroked him. ”Reports. Need to write reports,” was all he could say, hoping she understood his meaning.

”I can help with that.”

”I'm sure you can, my little temptress.”

She giggled-low and throaty and it made him rock against her more. ”No, I mean I can really help. Although, I'm fairly certain you have much better handwriting than I do. Or can it wait until tomorrow? Mayhap the day after that?”

He stopped and stared at her, his heart feeling warm and wide. ”You said mayhap, not maybe, as you do.”

She smiled and stroked up his c.o.c.k, letting her thumb rub around his sensitive head, making him nearly tremble with the pleasure of her touch.

”I figure, if I'm going to stay here, then I'd better speak the language, right?”

Forgetting his c.o.c.k, his desire, he crushed her in a tight embrace. ”You'd do that for me?” he asked into the top of her head. ”You'd give up your time for me?”

She pulled away enough, hence releasing his erection, to glance up at him. ”I love you,” was the answer she gave.

He'd felt loved before. Julia had loved him deeply. Before her, he'd been loved by the set of maids who had raised him. If it hadn't had been for Mrs. Hetty, Mrs. Iverson, and pretty young Miss Greene, and the love of his wife, he'd never have known how to feel so deeply appreciative for what Erva was offering. As much as he had loved the women in his life previously, he realized it was nothing compared to the way he felt about Erva. Granted, for Julia he would have knocked down mountains for her. But with Erva, she would help him either move a mountain or go through it. This kind of love, a true partner in life, he'd never known, and it made his whole mind and body spin with the possibilities that life could offer.

He tucked himself back into his breeches, trying to b.u.t.ton up at the same time he helped her skirts down to her ankles. It was time to be painfully honest with her.

”Erva, darling.” He cleared his throat. ”You keep asking me why I'm here.”

She sat up a bit more after smoothing her skirt, staring him in the eye. ”Yes.” Taking a quick breath, she said, ”I don't understand why you agreed to come here. Especially now that I know you. I believe the Howe brothers are here because, as much as they disagree with how King George III is dealing with the colonies, they believe in loyalty to the monarch, to the current hierarchy. I don't think you do.”

He nodded. ”You would be correct.”

”There were several officers who wouldn't come to America to fight.”

”Yes.”

She lifted her hand and placed it over his heart. ”So...you knew you didn't have to come. You could have said no. You also voted against the war in Parliament. I don't understand. Why did you say yes?”

He rethought about telling her. After all, she might think it too great a responsibility. But he didn't mean to tell her to obligate her, but to relate how much he loved her. Never great with words, he prayed he'd find the right ones for her.

”I-I gave up hope. After Julia died, I didn't know what to live for any more. I kept attending Parliament, banquets and parties, trying to live each day attempting to find a purpose. But I-I couldn't find one.” He swallowed and couldn't look at her while he admitted the truth. ”I know very well how damaging suicide is. Even Paul who had never taken a liking to Julia was beside himself for years over her death. I-I knew I could never do that to him. To anyone.”

She gasped and clutched at his coat. ”No.”

He glanced up and nodded. ”War profiteering has been known for thousands of years. I'm sure there were men who made large sums of money off the wars Homer wrote of.” He peeked down again at the small amount of s.p.a.ce between them. ”I-I simply thought that I could die, and it wouldn't be that remarkable during a war. I'd profit from the war in that way.”

Utterly surprising him, she smacked him hard against his chest with her little balled hands. ”No!” Tears pooled in her dark eyes. ”No! You can't-you just can't-no-” She hit him again, but this time without the ferocity as earlier.

He shook his head. ”I no longer think like this.”

She clutched at his coat, breathing fire on him. A lone tear left her eye and surfed down her alabaster cheek.

He wiped it away. ”I decided to t-tell you because I wanted you to know that I'm not thinking like that any longer. But more than that, I have hope now. Not just about our future, but the future generally. Since you know the name of what possessed Julia, the schizophrenia, that means there might be a way to help those who have it. I-I could help research in this area. I tried when Julia was alive, but now I know where to start. Thanks to you, I am finally thinking ahead. I'm hoping. Lord, I don't know if what I'm saying makes sense, for I don't want you to feel that you have to stay with me in order for me to keep living. I know from what I've said, you might think just that. But-but even if you left me, I'd still think of hope. I'd still be hopeful for the future. I wanted you to know how much I love you, how much of an impact you've had on my life. How, my darling, you have made me a better man.”

More tears left her tense face. He realized she was holding her breath.

”Don't...you,” she hiccupped her words, intense agony dripping between each one, ”ever...leave...me.”

He nodded. ”I'm sorry. I should have kept that to myself.”

Even more tears cascaded down her face, but her voice had calmed. ”No, I wondered why you were here. Now I know.” She sniffed. ”So that means you wouldn't be heartbroken if the Americans won this war, right?”

”How on earth can they win?”

Erva chuckled. Ah, she laughed, which broke any melancholia left in his heart.

”Oh, they had help,” she said. ”Lots of help. But, yeah, they win their independence. The crazy part is, that the British won the war against France and Spain.”

”France will join this war? Good Lord, I'm glad to be retiring.”

”So am I.” She smiled at him.

He needed to make sure of where her heart lay. ”My darling, truly, if you left me, I'd be...okay. I don't want you to feel responsible-”

”Are you trying to get me to leave you?”

He gripped her arms and pulled her close. ”Never.”

”Then why are you-”

”Because of what I just confessed to you. I don't want you to feel obligated to me. I want you to...want me.”

She chuckled. ”G.o.d, now I know we're meant to be together. You just recited a Cheap Trick song two hundred years before it was even sung. Then again, it is an old song. Maybe it was sung around your time.”

He nodded. ”I'm not sure what any of that means, but I hope that you don't feel obligated?”

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