Part 21 (2/2)

SMITH. I am delighted to make your acquaintance. (_Shakes her warmly by the hand_.) Friends of Miss Faraday have a claim upon me which can never be obliterated from my mind.

AUNT IDA. (_Briskly_) I am sure it is very pleasant to know that. But why?

(SMITH C., AUNT IDA _to his right_.)

FARADAY. Colonel Vavasour has just returned from Somaliland.

AUNT IDA. (_In horror_) What!!

MADGE. From Somaliland.

AUNT IDA. (_Involuntarily_) But why did he do that?

(SMITH _looks at_ FARADAY.)

FARADAY. Eh?--I don't think you understand, Ida. Colonel Vavasour is here--I may say--on an errand of mercy. He brings us news of our poor--gallant--lost friend--Smith.

AUNT IDA. S-S-Smith--?

FARADAY. Colonel Smith.

MADGE. Celia's Colonel Smith.

TARVER. (_Coming_ C. _at back with atlas, beckoning to_ FARADAY, _who joins him, and together they look over the atlas_, FARADAY _explaining something to_ TARVER) Colonel Vavasour knew him quite well.

AUNT IDA. (_In awestruck voice_) You--knew--the--Co--Co--Colonel?

SMITH. My dearest friend. I bring to Miss Faraday a few trinkets he habitually wore and his last dying message.

AUNT IDA. (_Wildly. Stands rigidly, staring at_ SMITH) Trinkets!! A message!! (_During the following speech_, AUNT IDA _gradually becomes more and more hysterical, culminating in a series of wild shrieks of hysterical laughter and grotesque movements of her arms and body_.)

SMITH. A long message. He used to lie in his sickbed, gazing across the thatched roofs of Berbera to the Arab dhows, riding at their anchors in the sea, and----

(AUNT IDA, _by now, is shrieking wildly and waving her arms above_.

MADGE _runs frightened across the_ L. _of_ AUNT IDA _and_ PHYLLIS _runs down from fender to_ R. _of_ AUNT IDA, _and together they help her into chair to_ L. _of table_ R. TARVER _and_ FARADAY _look up suddenly, startled_. SMITH _goes up_ L.C., _concealing laughter_.

PHYLLIS _stands_ R. _of chair below sofa, trying to hold_ AUNT IDA'S _hand_. EVELYN _runs excitedly and aimlessly about, looking for smelling salts_. FARADAY _runs up and down extreme_ L., _waving his arms_. MADGE _above chair, fanning_ AUNT IDA. TARVER C., _fanning_ AUNT IDA _with atlas. He kneels and fans her more vigorously. They all talk excitedly to each other, such as, ”What has happened to your Aunt Ida?” ”G.o.d bless my soul, can't you do something for your aunt?” ”She is having a fit,” ”Go for a doctor,” ”Fan her, fan her,” ”Get some water,” etc., etc. During all this_, AUNT IDA _is still shrieking_.)

PHYLLIS. (_At a signal from_ AUNT IDA) The shock has been too much for her.

MADGE. She's so devoted to Celia.

(AUNT IDA _whoops_.)

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